Anna Campbell - What a Duke Dares

He turned to her, stricken. “I promise I won’t.”

“That’s not a promise you can keep,” she said sadly, twining her hands together.

He straightened. “I won’t give up.”

She sighed, wishing this was over and she could go somewhere dark and silent to grieve. “The whole world knows that we’re an unsuitable match. London’s perfect gentleman and harum-scarum Penelope Thorne.”

He stumbled upright and this time when he advanced, he didn’t stop. “I don’t give a rat’s arse what the world says.”

Shock paralyzed her. “Of course you do.”

“No, my sweet, misguided wife, I don’t.” He placed his hands on either side of her head, caging her against the wall.

Her voice shook. “You’ve devoted your life to proving that a Rothermere can be a man of principle.”

“Rather I’ve wasted my life,” he said bitterly.

Bewildered, she stared at him. “You’ll rise above this scandal. Especially if I’m in Italy and you go back to being society’s ideal.”

“If you run away to Italy, I’ll follow.”

“Why would you do that?” She’d been afraid that if she touched him, her resolve might weaken. Now she pushed at his chest. Even a blow to her head couldn’t addle her like Cam’s nearness. “For heaven’s sake, stop looming.”

Desperation tightened his features. “Will you listen to me?”

She almost wished he’d retained his imperturbability. She still had no idea why her decision to leave touched not just his pride, but some deeper level. “Cam, if I stay with you, it will only sully the family reputation.”

To her relief, he lowered his arms. He remained too close for comfort, but she didn’t feel quite so surrounded. “Pen, I’ve come to realize that no man of character lives by someone else’s leave. I’m not responsible for my parents’ behavior. It’s time to say I’m Camden Rothermere, take me or leave me.”

Now that she observed him more closely, he did look different, as though he’d sloughed off a demon or two. Despite everything, she smiled. If he broke free of the old scandals, she could only rejoice. “Cam, if that’s true, I’m happy for you.”

“A man of character also stands up and says this is the woman I’ve chosen.”

Regret bit deep. “You didn’t choose me.”

To her surprise, he smiled. “Now who’s a fool? Of course I chose you. I think we were meant to end up together from the day we were born.”

“You only married me to prevent scandal,” she said miserably.

“I don’t care about scandal.” His voice lowered to a deep rumble that vibrated in her bones. “I care about you.”

She stiffened. “It’s not enough, Cam.”

“I’ll convince you that it is.”

“I’ll be in Italy.”

His gaze was unwavering. “If I have to go to the ends of the earth, I’ll court you as no woman has ever been courted. I’m going to win your love.”

“But why?” she asked frantically. “This can’t just be vanity.”

The frown returned. “Pen, don’t you understand what I’m saying?”

Vehemently she shook her head. “You’ve always treated love as the enemy.”

His laugh was harsh. “Love was terrifying.”

Confusion still fogged her mind. “Of course love is terrifying. If it’s not terrifying, it’s not love.”

Another harsh laugh. “So terrifying that I still run like a coward.”

“You’re not a coward, Cam,” she said woodenly, tiring of this bewildering conversation. Lack of sleep must make her stupid. Or Leath’s blow.

“Mere words frighten me.”

When he grabbed her shoulders, she started. “Let me go.”

“Not yet. Not until you hear me out.” He was ashen and the hands on her shoulders trembled. A muscle twitched in his cheek, always a sign of deep emotion.

“Cam—”

He spoke over her in a hard voice. “I love you, Pen. I love you more than I ever thought I’d love anyone in my misbegotten life. I love you so much that you make me shake. I love you so much that you have the power to consign me to eternal darkness if you leave me.”

Amazed, speechless, devastated, disbelieving, Pen stared at him. Her heart stopped beating. Even in dreams, she’d never imagined that he’d say anything like this.

“You’ve brought me to this pass. It started years ago. Before I proposed. Before the world’s longest wild goose chase to find another woman I wanted to marry. My affliction has only worsened since I found you again.” His voice cracked as the words tumbled out. “I know your gift for love. I’ve seen it over and over again. I covet that love for myself. I humbly ask for the chance to become the man you want.”

Cam was made to command. She couldn’t believe that he loved her enough to beg.

“Please, say something. Even if it’s to send me to the devil.” His hands clenched on her shoulders before, with an apologetic gesture, he released her.

“Do—” She swallowed to release the scratchy words. “Do you mean it?”

“Damn it, of course I mean it,” he said roughly. He reached for her, then reconsidered. That truncated, defeated gesture sliced at her heart.

“If you don’t mean it, I’ll never forgive you,” she said in a rush.

“You have no reason to give me another chance, but if you do, I promise to make you happy.” His eyes burned into hers. “Put me out of my misery. Tell me there’s hope.”

She blinked away tears. Despite the anguish and violence and drama, today turned into the best day of her life. She caught one of the hands he bunched at his sides. “I don’t understand how this happened.”

That muscle still flickered in his cheek. “I’ve loved you for weeks. But I’m such a novice to love, it was only when you leaped between Harry and Leath that I could admit to myself what you really mean to me.” His Adam’s apple bobbed as if he relived the horror. “You’d die for the people you love. I realized that I’d die for you. It’s as simple as that. Once I accepted that, everything else made sense. Please, Pen, all I ask is one word to say that it’s not too late.”

She felt buffeted by his astounding confession. Not yet happy. Not yet secure. But as she met his gaze, she believed him. Tears won the battle and started to fall.

“Don’t cry, Pen. Please don’t cry.” Shaking, he cupped her cheek.

“Cam—” Too choked to speak, she raised his hand and kissed his knuckles. A kiss of homage. A kiss of gratitude. A kiss, above all, of love returned. “You’re wrong. You are the man that I want.”

The confession was so low and so weighted with tears, she didn’t expect him to hear. But he went instantly still. “What did you say?”

Dazzled, she gazed at him. “I said I love you.” She sucked in a shuddering breath and finally confessed her oldest secret. “I’ve always loved you. You. Only you.”

She saw hope leap, then subside under confusion. “But when I asked you to marry me—”

She twined her arms around him and kissed him with all the love in her heart. His lips answered with an unspoken question. He wanted to believe her, but he didn’t. She’d felt the same when he’d said he loved her.

Reluctantly she broke the kiss. “Of course I said no. How could I bear to live with you every day and know that you’d never return my love?”

The green eyes flared and his lips curved in an exultant smile. “You have such pride.”

“So do you.”

“I should have damn well realized that I loved you when the thought of you drowning made me want to die too.” His eyes darkened. “Pen, I’ve hurt you for so long. I had no idea. How can you forgive me?”

She returned his smile with a joy that washed away regret and bitterness. “Say you love me again.”