Morgan Rice - Resurrected

“What’s the point?” Scarlet responded, feeling her heart pounding inside her chest. “I don’t understand. Like I said, I’m fine.”

Was her mom losing her mind? Was her family going crazy?

“You don’t know that,” her mom said.

“What are you saying: I’m not fine?”

Scarlet felt herself shaking inside.

“Caitlin, Scarlet is fine,” her dad interjected. She was grateful that at least he was taking her side. “Just because the event shook you – ”

“I just want her to meet with the priest,” she responded, her voice rising, too, more insistent than ever. “Please. Just do this for me. He can heal you.”

Scarlet found herself standing, her face flushing red.

“Heal me of what !?” she snapped, nearly shouting.

Her mom just stared back, silent.

“You’re crazy!” she yelled back at her mom. “You’re losing it! You’re the one that needs to be healed! Seriously. You go talk to someone. Like a shrink or something. I don’t need to be healed. I’m fine. I’m sorry if you see me as some kind of freak. But I’m not. I’m perfectly normal!” she shouted, as if trying to convince herself, too.

Scarlet burst into tears as she turned and fled the room, running up the steps, crying, Ruth at her heels.

She could hardly process it all. She couldn’t believe that her mom thought of her as a sick person. As needing to see a priest. To be healed. What did that even mean? What did she think was wrong with her?

As Scarlet ran up the steps she heard her parents voices below, arguing with each other. She heard her dad sticking up for her, yelling at her mom, and heard her mom yelling back. Scarlet cried harder. She felt as if her entire family life was crumbling around her. Was she to blame? What was going on? It seemed like just yesterday everything was so perfect.

Scarlet ran down the hall and slammed her bedroom door behind her. She heard her mom’s footsteps on the staircase, then down the hall, coming towards her door.

“Scarlet, I want talk to you!” her mom shouted, outside her door.

“Go away!” she screamed back.

“Scarlet, please, open the door!”

But Scarlet ignored it. She locked her door, crossed her room, and curled up in her favorite chair, Ruth at her lap.

Scarlet sat there, never feeling more alone in the world, as she cried and cried. After a long time, finally, her mom’s voice disappeared from the door.

Scarlet eventually sat up, wiped away her tears, and reached over and grabbed her small, white leather journal from her end table. She used to write in it every night, though she hadn’t written in a while. Now, she felt the need to. She had to make sense of her world, to get a hold on her range of conflicting emotions.

She pulled back the cover, flipped through the pages and found an empty page. She reached over and grabbed her favorite, purple pen, then leaned over and began to write:

Today was the worst day. I woke up in the hospital. I can hardly believe it. It was so weird. I came home sick, then blacked out, and I don’t remember anything in between. Mom and Dad say I ran out the house, and that I was missing for a while. Which really freaks me out. I don’t remember it at all. I really want to know where I went. What I did. If I saw any of my friends. Hopefully, no one saw me.

I’m also freaked about what happened to me. Am I sick? Was it sleepwalking or something? Will it happen again? Mom doesn’t want to let it go. She keeps asking me if I’m okay, and she’s so worried. Now she wants me to talk to a priest. It’s so annoying. I can’t stand to be around her right now, and I’ve never really felt this way before.

The dance on Friday is causing me so much pressure. I was sure Blake would ask me today. I’m sure he would have if it weren’t for Vivian. I hate her. Every time Blake gets near me, I feel she’s waiting to steal him. I don’t know if he asked her. Or if he’ll ask me. I hate dances. This is all so stupid anyway.

I wish I knew where Blake stood. We had a really good time the other night, at the movies, on my birthday. I really want to be close to him. I want him to be my boyfriend. I don’t really know if he feels the same. Is he not into me? Is he into Vivian? Did I do something wrong?

Then there’s this new kid. Sage. The one Maria likes. It was so weird, seeing him today. I can’t explain it. It’s like I knew him. I wish I hadn’t seen him. He’s Maria’s territory after all, and I’m into Blake. Or am I? I don’t really understand how I’m feeling – and that bothers me more than anything.

I need answers. Tomorrow can’t come soon enough.

The next day for Scarlet came and went too fast. She rushed off to school, leaving early so she didn’t have to deal with her parents, and her morning classes had gone by in a whirl. She’d had no contact with Blake whatsoever, and had hardly even seen him. She caught a glimpse of him in the halls, as she rushed from one class to the next. She hadn’t seen that new kid, Sage. And she hadn’t seen Vivian either. It was just a long and boring and anxiety-provoking day, keeping her in suspense as the minutes ticked slowly from class to class.

She’d been so nervous for lunchtime, expecting to see them all in the cafeteria, expecting Blake to come up to her. But her stupid science teacher had kept her after class, and by the time she reached the cafeteria, she only had a few minutes to eat, and had missed everybody. She was so mad at her teacher. She was sure that if she’d arrived just a few minutes earlier she would’ve run into Blake, and he would’ve asked her.

Now, the day was almost over, with only a few periods left, as Scarlet walked with Maria down the halls, heading towards gym and the playing fields. They walked outside into the beautiful October day, the sun shining everywhere, lighting up the leaves in a million colors, and she headed eagerly with Maria across the acres of grass. At least she was sure that this time, she would see Blake. They all had gym together, after all. Several classes met for gym – nearly a hundred kids – but still, there was no way he could really avoid her – unless he wanted to.

At least, finally, she would know how he really felt. If it turned out that he didn’t want to take her to the dance, fine – she could at least get clear in her head that she would either go with someone else, or not go at all, and be able to stop obsessing over this.

“Think we’ll get picked for the same team?” Maria asked, as they jogged towards the big crowd of kids.

“Hope so.”

Scarlet wasn’t exactly the best athlete on the field. She wasn’t the most coordinated person in the world, and she never got picked first, or close to first. She just wasn’t as competitive as some of the other girls. The gym teacher always let them divide into teams and pick whoever they wanted; Scarlet just hoped that she got picked on Maria’s team.

Scarlet jogged with Maria across the grass, and it felt good to be out of school and under the open sky, as they headed towards the crowd. As they went, Scarlet scanned the fields, looking for Blake. She spotted him in the distance, on the adjacent field, with the boys as they divvied up teams for the boys’ football game. But he wasn’t looking her way and there was no way to really talk to him. She would just have to hope he came over after the game.

“OMG, he’s here,” Maria suddenly said in an excited whisper. “I can’t believe it. Don’t look but I think he’s staring at me.”

At first Scarlet was confused, but then she looked in the other direction, and spotted someone else: Sage. She did a double take. There he stood, hands in his jacket pockets, standing alone on the sidelines, watching. She couldn’t believe it. He was here. And he was looking right at her.