H. Mallory - Ghouls Rush In

“ Ah, le barbare . The barbarian, ” Drake muttered in my head.

“ I don’t want to hear about it! ” I threw back at him. “ He’s my friend, and if you don’t like it, I’ll just put you on mute again! ”

“ I shall bite my tongue. No need to threaten me, ma minette. ”

I didn’t respond but, instead, focused on Ryan who continued to stand in my doorway, looking decidedly nervous or uncomfortable about something. “Ryan, is everything okay?” I asked.

He nodded and then shook his head, running his hand through his hair as he looked past me and into my living room. “Are you busy, Pey?” he asked, finally returning his gaze to my face. “I, uh, I was hopin’ we could talk for a few minutes.”

Confused as to what he wanted to talk about but undeniably curious, I held the door open wider for him. “I don’t have any plans this morning so we can talk,” I responded.

He didn’t say anything but quickly walked inside as I closed the door behind him. When I turned to face him, he was already staring at me and his expression was one of befuddlement as he took in my robe and then my nightgown. “Where did you get that white thing?” he asked, pointing at it and obviously not appreciating it.

I was about to tell him that Christopher had given it to me but then realized that would mean I’d have to unleash the whole long story about Christopher and Lovie possessing me with Drake’s soul and I couldn’t say I was in the right frame of mind to explain the whole thing. Especially not when it was clearly obvious that Ryan’s visit had everything to do with getting something off his chest. “Oh, around,” I answered evasively before changing the subject. “So, what’s up? You seem like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders.”

He chuckled as his eyebrows reached for the ceiling and then he sighed. He glanced around himself before returning his gaze to mine. “Is there somewhere we can sit?”

I smiled because he was more than aware that the only two rooms that were completed in the house were the guest bedroom and bathroom. I just nodded and took the lead down the hallway and into my makeshift bedroom where I took a seat on the bed and he sat just beside me, turning his enormous body so that he was facing me.

“Okay, so what’s on your mind? Spill the beans!” I said with a laugh as I wondered if this was the point at which he was going to try to talk his way out of finishing the rest of my house. He just had a worried expression that made me fear I wouldn’t like whatever was going to come out of his mouth.

“I, uh, I’ve been thinkin’,” he started and glanced down at his lap as he rubbed the back of his head and then brought his eyes back to mine.

“About?” I prodded, wondering why he was finding it so difficult to just come out with it.

“About us, Peyton,” he answered almost immediately.

I felt my stomach drop but then had to remind myself that we’d already had this conversation. “It’s okay, Ryan,” I said with a small smile. “I’m totally okay with us being friends.”

But he shook his head, which told me he wasn’t talking about the conversation we’d already had. I suddenly felt my stomach drop even further as I realized what this might mean. “Please tell me you still want to be friends?” I asked, hating the thought as it occurred to me.

“No, I don’t want to be friends,” he answered in a nearly harsh voice before he immediately shook his head. “That’s not what I meant…” Then his voice trailed off completely as he paid attention to his knee, which was bobbing up and down as if he were overloaded with nervous energy.

“Um, what did you mean?” I asked, afraid that he did mean exactly what he’d said but didn’t like the way it had sounded so abrasive and was now going to try to soften the blow.

He sighed and brought his attention back to my face. I suddenly wanted to cry. “Pey, I’ve been doin’ a lot o’ thinkin’ since we last talked an’ I’ve realized that I’m makin’ a mistake.”

Don’t cry, Pey! I told myself. Please don’t cry!

“ If this barbarian causes you to cry, ma minette, he will answer to me! ” Drake responded, reminding me that he was still in my body and my mind.

“ Answer to you? ” I demanded, thinking it sounded ridiculous. “ Remember, you’re in my body, which means he’ll basically be answering to me! ”

“ Ah, très vrai . Very true, ” Drake said in apparent realization and then disappeared back into the deep recesses of my mind.

“A mistake?” I repeated, placing my full attention back on the conversation as I inwardly sighed.

Ryan nodded and then offered me a genuine smile. “I have to get beyond this grief, Peyton,” he continued. “An’ I’ll be honest with you, meetin’ you scared the hell out o’ me.”

“But is that a good reason to end our friendship?” I asked, shaking my head against the tears that were already threatening to break their way through.

“I believe it is a good reason to end our friendship,” Ryan started before taking another deep breath. “Because I want to experience more with you.”

I felt my eyebrows scrunch up in the middle as he completely derailed my train of thought and I went careening into the side of a mountain. “Wha-what?” I asked, rather eloquently.

He chuckled and then took my hand in his as he leaned into me. “Peyton, I screwed up. I was afraid o’ the feelin’s I had for you because I haven’t felt them in such a long time an’ the idea o’ lovin’ someone is frightenin’ to me.”

“Loving someone?” I repeated, my voice sounding ridiculously high.

But he didn’t seem frightened by the word. “Yes,” he answered succinctly. “Pey, I want this to work out between us.” He waved at me and then himself. “I want us to work out because the idea of my life without you isn’t somethin’ I even want to contemplate. An’ the idea of another man sweepin’ you up makes me want to punch somethin’.”

I laughed and almost couldn’t believe I was hearing Ryan say these words because they were so unexpected. I had to half wonder if I was still asleep and dreaming or maybe I’d really lost my mind and was hallucinating this whole thing.

“He makes me want to punch something ,” Drake muttered.

“ Oh, shut it! ” I yelled back at him. He didn’t respond so I figured he’d taken my advice.

“Say somethin’,” Ryan said as I realized that while I’d been having a spat with Drake, Ryan was sitting here waiting for me to come back to reality. “Please tell me I’m not too late with this or that you don’t feel the same way I do?”

I took a deep breath and wasn’t sure if I should just throw my arms around him and cry tears of happiness or jump up and sing “Hallelujah” at the top of my lungs. Fortunately I managed neither and instead just smiled at him while I tried to keep my tears at bay. “When you came here, I thought you were going to tell me we couldn’t be friends anymore and the thought of that made my heart break in two.”

He nodded and dropped his attention to his hands where they fidgeted with my duvet cover. “So you do just want to stay friends, then?” he asked quietly.

“Let me finish,” I said and leaned forward while I shushed him with my index finger against his lips. “What I was going to say was that I can think of no better reason to change the scope of our friendship than by expanding it into a relationship.” I felt my lips split into a huge, beaming smile. “Ryan, I’ve cared about you from the moment you first showed up on my doorstep in the middle of that storm.” I took a deep breath and smiled again. “You had me at ‘Is your roof leaking?’ ”