Jessica Sims - Bear Naked

I pulled out my one thermos, rinsed it with some clean snow, and poured coffee in. Then, I extended it to him over the small, flickering fire.

He reached for it, and his fingers brushed mine. Warm, strong. His scent brushed over me and I felt a low shiver of pleasure in my belly. That’s the heat talking, Nikolina , I reminded myself. “So you don’t remember me?”

Leif raised the thermos to his mouth and drank. He grimaced at the taste, but then took another sip, as if not quite sure if he liked it or not. I smiled at his reaction. I liked my coffee super strong and bitter, and black as night. He stared down at his cup, and then squinted at me. “I seem to recall this tasting better.”

I chuckled at his displeased expression. “I didn’t bring sugar with me. Sorry.”

He grunted, and then turned his gaze on me, studying my face. I held my breath for a long moment, but then he shook his head. “I don’t remember you.”

“I’m Nikolina. Nikolina Aasen. I was ten when you left.”

“How old are you now?”

Was he not aware of how many years had passed? “I’m twenty-six.”

He stared down at the coffee thermos in his hands for so long that it grew uncomfortable. Then, he looked back up at me. “How old am I?”

I bit my lip. “You were eighteen when you left, so that would make you thirty-four.”

His brows drew down, as if he were surprised to hear that. “I see.”

I wanted to ask him if he remembered why he’d left, but I couldn’t. What if he didn’t remember that Katja had died? What if it broke his heart all over again and he ran once more? I swallowed hard. “Do you remember…anything else?”

“Not much.” He took another sip of coffee and shifted on his feet. I tried not to stare at his junk, dangling between his crouching legs. It was hard not to, though. It was just…out there. And prominent. Leif spoke again. “My memories are clouded. It’s mostly snow…and penguins.”

I smiled at that. “That’s all this island seems to be.”

He nodded. “I don’t think…” he blinked and looked at me, really focused. “I don’t think I like the way they taste.”

I laughed at that, surprised at his rueful admission.

Leif looked startled at my laughter, his muscles tensing. Then, he relaxed, and I watched his eyes crinkle at the corners, and his mouth pulled up into a return smile. “I like that sound.”

That soft flutter returned to my belly, and I clamped my legs tighter together, though for an entirely different reason this time. This time, it was desire.

He stared at me intensely for a long moment, and then his head tilted. “You are wounded.”

I touched the long scratch on my cheek. It throbbed when I thought about it, so I was doing my best not to. “Not badly.”

“Was it…me?” His mouth twisted, the smile disappearing. “Did I hurt you?”

I gave a small nod. I didn’t want to lie to him.

His face fell and he looked down at the coffee thermos in his hands. Very slowly, he set it down on the far side of the fire. Then, he stood, shrugging off the sleeping bag.

“Wait,” I said, “don’t go.” We were making progress.

But when I got to my feet, he loped away and began to change.

Frustrated, I dropped back down to my crouch and stared at his retreating figure, already turning into his bear form within a few paces. Damn it. Leif’s psyche was fragile. I’d have to tread carefully with him. I needed to get him to return, and coax him into spending more time in human form with me.

I picked up the coffee thermos and finished it off. Tomorrow, I’d brew more coffee and see what I could prepare in my supplies bag that might entice him back out for a visit.

The next morning, the scent of were-bear shifter was heavy over my campsite. I’d slept in my tent after stitching back together the pieces of my sleeping bag, and the fact that Leif had been exploring while I slept but hadn’t bothered me was pleasing. It meant he was aware of who I was and was curious enough to keep returning.

That was a good sign.

Pleased, I broke out some of my supplies and dug through them, trying to figure out what I could make over a fire. I’d stashed some chocolate away - I was hormonal thanks to the heat, and so it had seemed like a great idea. I dug out some of the chocolate and made a new pot of coffee - a bit weaker this time, in anticipation of Leif’s return. And then, I stirred a bit of my precious chocolate into the coffee and let it melt, sweetening it.

I didn’t drink it. I waited for Leif to show.

And waited.

And waited. While I waited, I pulled out my small sewing kit and tightened the stitches on my sleeping bag. I’d hastily stitched it last night but found that even the smallest gaps let the frigid air in, so I was busy re-stitching it and tightening it.

Just as I was finishing my stitches, the wind shifted and I caught the scent of were-bear on the breeze. I dropped my sewing and lifted my head, just in time to see a large mass of brown moving in the snowy hills in the distance.

“Leif?” I called out.

No response.

“Leif? I made some coffee for you again. It tastes better today, I promise,” I called. Could he even understand me when he was shifted? I could understand English just fine when I was in my bear form, but I also hadn’t spent sixteen straight years in that form.

But to my relief, Leif appeared - human Leif - a few minutes later. He looked uncertain, lurking around the edges of the camp as if afraid to come closer. His eyes watched me warily, and they were the eyes of a feral predator once more, almost all humanity gone from them.

I patted the sleeping bag next to me in invitation. I spread it out like a picnic blanket and then put the thermos of chocolate-sweetened coffee down on the center of it, and unscrewed the lid so he could catch the smell. I’d had to dump nearly a full bar of chocolate to sweeten the drink properly, but the scent that wafted up was rich and thick.

He hesitated only a moment, and then moved to sit on the blanket, wrapping his hands around the thermos. He sipped it, then closed his eyes in pleasure. “Nikolina,” he groaned.

I was startled to hear my name said like that. I supposed that was his way of saying thank you, but it was…odd. Pleasing, but odd. “You’re welcome,” I told him, and then shifted to pull the blanket around his shoulders to protect him from the biting wind. It was bitterly cold despite the sunshine and I was wearing several layers of clothing. Seeing Leif naked like that made me concerned for frostbite, despite his were-bear nature. “Do you want something to eat?”

He studied my face for a long moment, and then nodded. “If you…if you have it to spare.”

“I do.” I’d brought plenty of protein bars with me. They weren’t exciting food, but they were compact and I was able to bring a lot of them. I unwrapped a chocolate-flavored one and offered it to him, since he seemed to have a sweet tooth.

Leif took it and ate it quickly, wolfing it down. It concerned me to see him scarf the food, and I wondered if it had more to do with starvation than a lack of manners. He said he didn’t like penguin, but there wasn’t much more on this island than penguins. Maybe that was why he was so lean. “Do you want another?”

At his nod, I gave him another and watched him eat. When he was done, he returned to sipping his coffee, his gaze on me.

I didn’t move. Simply watched him and smiled encouragingly.

After a long moment, he reached out and touched my cheek with one dirty finger, caressing me. “I’m sorry.”

About the scratch there? It was almost gone. “Don’t’ worry about it,” I told him. “It’s healing up. And you weren’t in your right mind.”