J. McKenna: Secretary’s Punishment

The office nickname for her new boss didn’t do anything for her confidence. “Uh, yes, I am.”

“I’m Heather.”

“Oh, I’m Emily. Nice to meet you.”

“Word of advice?”

“Uh, sure.”

“Mr. Caudry hates those Styrofoam cups.” She went to the cupboard and pulled out a clean mug with the company logo on the side. “Use one of these.”

Emily flushed with gratitude for Heather. “Oh! Thank you! I don’t want to make a bad first impression.” She poured the coffee into the mug.

“Trust me, with that man, no one can make a good first impression. Just ride it out as long as you can.” She shook her head and turned and headed for the refrigerator.

Emily, feeling shaken by her close call, went back to the office and knocked on the door. “Mr. Caudry?” she said softly. “Mr. Caudry?”

“Come in, damn it!”

She hurried inside, holding up the cup. She noticed at once that his desk was completely clear of any clutter. “I’m sorry, Mr. Caudry, I don’t yet know how you want to be disturbed. Do you prefer I use the intercom or knock or just come in?”

For the first time, Caudry paused, his eyes seeming to soften. “Well, that’s nice of you to ask. When I’ve asked you to get me coffee, you may knock once and come in. Place the coffee on my desk and leave immediately. I’m often on the phone and I won’t want to be bothered.”

“Yes, Mr. Caudry.” She placed his coffee within reach and left at once, pleased that she had some kind of small breakthrough. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all, she thought.

If she had only known.

Emily quickly learned that nearly everything was a test. Pass and he’d nod his acceptance; fail and he’d express his great disappointment in that maddeningly calm voice of his. She knew she could be fired at any time and vowed to learn from her mistakes. She needed this job!

She was called in to dictate a letter and Emily was so nervous she could hardly sit still. She tried to remember her shorthand, but her boss spoke so quickly! When she left, three pages of notes in hand, she despaired to get it right.

Taking a deep breath, she started right away, hoping she could remember what her notes missed. She spent a half-hour typing it up on her computer until Mr. Caudry buzzed her and asked, “What’s taking so long? I could’ve written it myself by now!”

Emily wondered about that too—wouldn’t it be easier for him to simply write up the damn letters himself? Isn’t that what computers are for? “I’ll be right in, sir.”

She printed out the two-page letter, rose on shaky legs, knocked once on his door and went in. She passed the letter over quietly and waited. It didn’t take him long to scan it.

“What is this? I didn’t say ‘take’—I clearly said ‘make.’ Where did you learn shorthand, anyway?”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Caudry, I can fix it.”

He found two more mistakes—all in all, not bad, considering, she thought. They were easily fixable. A normal boss would’ve simply asked her to redo it and let it go.

But not Mr. Caudry.

“This is unacceptable, completely unacceptable. I can see I’m going to have to talk to Mrs. Dowd.” His voice was calm, just like before, which made her feel worse. She almost would’ve preferred he yelled at her. But to be admonished by that calm, forceful voice made her feel like a misbehaving child, not a grown woman!

Emily stood there and took it, her eyes downcast. Her heart beat wildly and she felt she was about to lose her job— and for no good reason! She was trying to learn! Just give her a little time!

“Please, sir,” she blurted. “I promise to do better. It’s only my first day!”

He took a long slow breath. “Very well,” he said. “I hope you learn quickly. As you’ve probably discovered, I have limited patience with errors.”

Emily corrected the mistakes and vowed not to make any others. But there were so many letters he demanded! He was still young—it didn’t make sense for him to be so technically inept with his computer.

Over the next two days, whether by nervousness or carelessness, Emily gave him two more letters with mistakes on them. To most bosses, it would’ve simply been first week adjustments, but Mr. Caudry was not like most bosses.

“I’m sorry,” he told her Wednesday, holding her latest letter with two red circles around the typos, “but this isn’t working out. I can’t conduct my business when I have to constantly be correcting your typing errors.”

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Caudry, please give me another chance! It’s all so new and—”

“Grammar is new? Spelling is new?”

She felt her face grow hot. “Un, no, I didn’t mean that. It’s just that this is only my third day. I’m trying really hard—”

“If you were trying hard, you wouldn’t be making these silly errors.” His voice was calm, as usual. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to call Mrs. Dowd and ask to have you replaced with someone whose English skills are more solid.”

Emily could not face going back out on the job market so soon. “Please, Mr. Caudry! I’ll do anything to keep this job! Anything!”

He paused for a long time. She finally glanced up and saw his expression. His head was tipped to one side and he was studying her, like a scientist might mull a thorny problem. She waited breathlessly for him to speak.

“There was one secretary who almost made it,” he said at last, wistfulness in his voice. Emily waited, certain she could learn something valuable. “She made mistakes at first, just like you. She also begged for a second and a third chance. She told me she would rather be punished than be fired. It seemed to work for a while.”

“P-punished?” What the hell did that mean? Dock her pay?

“Yes. Since she was acting like a child, I treated her as a child. Perhaps that might work for you.”

She looked up, confused. “Uh, well...”

“Or we can end it right here.” He picked up the phone. “I can ask Mrs. Dowd to replace you. Just tell her it didn’t work out and that you’ll be leaving immediately.”

She shook her head. “I’m sorry, sir. Please don’t call her.” She had too many debts to start over now! If she left now, she’d lose her apartment for sure. “I’ll do anything to help me learn more quickly,” she repeated.

He nodded. After a long minute, he put down the phone. “Very well.” He placed the letter in the middle of the blotter, the two pages side by side, and turned them around so she could read them. She could see the two red marks indicating her mistakes.

“I want you to lean over the desk on your elbows,” he said. “Put your face down close to your work.”

Confused, Emily did as she was told, feeling a thrum throughout her body. She knew this wasn’t right, and yet ... something was happening to her. Something she couldn’t explain.

“No, closer,” he said.

She scooted up until her thighs bumped against the desk and her face was less than a foot from the papers. She realized she was in a very vulnerable position. Emily could feel sweat begin to collect on her upper lip and neck.

Mr. Caudry gave her a moment to study her unacceptable work. Then, with deliberate slowness, he opened the desk drawer and pulled out a thick wooden ruler. Emily’s eyes widened and she fought a gasp that bubbled up from within. He held the ruler in his hands for a moment, giving her time to understand her predicament. Slowly, he walked around behind her. That thrumming feeling in her stomach expanded, moving to her loins and breasts and she tried not to shiver from anticipation.

“The rule we came up with, that secretary and I, was one stroke for each mistake, at first. Later mistakes required increasing the number of strokes per incident. It did wonders for her concentration. She reduced her errors almost immediately.”