William Gay: Twilight

As a matter of fact I ain’t. Let’s take a walk, Tyler.

He started off toward the railroad tracks and after a moment’s hesitation Tyler fell in beside him. He was torn between curiosity about Sutter’s purpose and the desire to just walk away. More’s the fool he didn’t, Tyler thought, but the moment when he could have just walked off down the road and made this never be had passed and it would not come again. Somehow this all felt preordained and out of control, as if someone was behind the curtains mimicking voices and controlling the strings. As if for all the years of his life he and Sutter had been passing and repassing in the dark and now here they were face to face in God’s own daylight and there was nothing for it.

They walked past the drygoods store down toward the railroad track. Poolroom loungers watched them pass with curiosity. Mentor and protege, perhaps, warlock and aspiring wizard. People they met seemed to defer to Sutter, to give him more room than was necessary for his passage. Grimes’s carlot. Grimes’s cars sat forlorn and lustreless under the leaden sky, and the pennants strung on wires snapped and fluttered in the stiff wind.

Sutter didn’t talk for a time. He built himself a careful cig Sutter dropped his cigarette. Ground it out with a conscientious foot.

Or who knows, he shrugged. Maybe you do look like your daddy. Names and blood don’t always go arm in arm.

Tyler was momentarily off balance. He stood studying Sutter as if measuring his size against his own. Finally he said, You might ought to watch your mouth. Anyway, I don’t reckon you been hanging around here waiting to talk to me about my daddy.

As a matter of fact I ain’t. Let’s take a walk, Tyler.

He started off toward the railroad tracks and after a moment’s hesitation Tyler fell in beside him. He was torn between curiosity about Sutter’s purpose and the desire to just walk away. More’s the fool he didn’t, Tyler thought, but the moment when he could have just walked off down the road and made this never be had passed and it would not come again. Somehow this all felt preordained and out of control, as if someone was behind the curtains mimicking voices and controlling the strings. As if for all the years of his life he and Sutter had been passing and repassing in the dark and now here they were face to face in God’s own daylight and there was nothing for it.

They walked past the drygoods store down toward the railroad track. Poolroom loungers watched them pass with curiosity. Mentor and protege, perhaps, warlock and aspiring wizard. People they met seemed to defer to Sutter, to give him more room than was necessary for his passage. Grimes’s carlot. Grimes’s cars sat forlorn and lustreless under the leaden sky, and the pennants strung on wires snapped and fluttered in the stiff wind.

Sutter didn’t talk for a time. He built himself a careful cigalmost dizzy with shock. He wished himself fleeing along the railroad tracks. All this over and forgotten or never been.

Course a man can get the bigeye thinkin about all that money. I can understand that. That’s why we can get this mess straightened out right here at the start and make it easy on everbody. All he wants is the pictures back. He’s willin to forget the rest of it, the blackmailin charge, the theft, just to get his property back. There might even be a small piece of money, call it a finder’s fee, say five hundred dollars, when you lay them in my hand.

Apprentice blackmailer though he was, even Tyler knew something about this did not quite ring right. He knew it was more than the pictures. Breece and Sutter knew it as well, for the pictures were only symbols for the dark perversions of the waiting graves: the graves lay ticking like timebombs, untold numbers of them, dividing insanely like the malignant cells of an embryonic cancer. The pictures didn’t mean anything.

I’d like to help you out, Tyler said. Lord knows I could use five hundred dollars. I just don’t know what you’re talking about. Pictures of what?

Sutter was quiet for a time. He seemed to be studying the cordwood haulers. They had the truck unloaded now and had jumped down from the bed. Tyler could smell the hot winy odor of curing wood. The sun had descended further and what he could see of the world lay half in shadow, half in thin light splayed out across the houses clustered on the hillside across from town.

He chose to ignore Tyler’s last words, as if they were so ludicrous they didn’t deserve comment or perhaps his acknowledgment might lend them a credibility they didn’t deserve. Course I took into consideration maybe it wasn’t all your doin. Maybe you just easy led, and I ought to went to her to begin with. But I believe a man’s accountable for the actions of his womenfolks, don’t you?

No, Tyler said. I don’t believe one person can be responsible for another person’s life. We’re on our own.

Sutter shrugged. Still, I figured man to man between me and you would be better. We ought to be able to come to terms. What it is, you don’t quite see the whole picture. You’re lookin at it, but you’re not seein all the details. You’ve got some idea about Fenton Breece and you’re judgin me by him. Fat and soft and very likely some specie of queer. Let’s get it straight right now that me and him ain’t nothin alike. Right? If we was, he wouldn’t have me agentin for him to begin with. He’d of just took care of it hisself.

What’s he paying you?

I won’t lie to you. He’s payin me plenty. Because he’s got a lot to lose and because he thinks I can stop up the holes where it’s spillin out. And make no mistake about it, Tyler, I can. I’m the fix-it man, and you’re the problem I been hired to fix.

I don’t have them, Tyler said.

Maybe not. But you know where they live. Whatever you have to do, you better get your mind right to do it. Because I’m not foolin around, and I don’t want no mistake about it. If you have to talk to her, you better let her know I’m dead serious.

Tyler didn’t say anything. The cordwood truck had gone, and a cool blue dusk lay over the railroad yard. Across the tracks where happenstantial shanties spilled yellow light, three young blacks strolled toward town, and a woman’svoice, faintly ridiculing, called something after them.

I got to get on, Tyler said. He’d thought he was able to handle whatever befell him but this was something new. Something far outside the borders, and he could feel a panicky fear like cold waters rising about him. He didn’t know how deep they were and he didn’t know if he could swim in them. Anywhere seemed preferable to here but when he made to go Sutter’s hand on his arm stayed him.

Not just yet, Sutter said.

The hand tightened on Tyler’s biceps, then moved away.

None of this means anything, Tyler said. It’s all just a waste of time. If I went to the law, it would all be out the window anyway.

If, Sutter said contemptuously. If a frog had a glass ass, he’d only jump one time and bust like a dropped teacup. We both know you’re not goin to the law. If you did, there’d go your big money. Which is gone anyway, you’ve kissed it goodbye and never knowed it. And on top of that, graverobbin and foolin with corpses ain’t never been too highly thought of in this part of the country.

We never robbed any graves.

Sutter shrugged. You got your story, Breece has got his. He’s prepared to swear in a court of law that he caught you and your sister diggin up graves and doin stuff to the bodies. Desecratin em, he called it. I guess the first tale told is the one that gets listened to.

I got to get on. I have to think what to do.

Then while you’re at it, think about this: I’ll do what I have to do. It’s a hell of a lot of money, and it would move me pretty far down the line, and it looks like I need to be there. All these son of a bitches. Push and push and keep on and I’ve hadabout all I want of it. I’m goin to lay some folks out to cool if I have to, and I don’t particularly care who. But what I want you to think about is the worst thing that can happen. You know when somethin bad happens, how folks kind of console one another? They say, well, it could of been worse. This or that could of happened. Well, not this time. Believe it. I am absolutely the worst thing that can happen to you.