Michael Ford - Z

“He followed me,” said Charlie.

Josh stood there, not sure he’d heard her correctly. “Followed you?” he said. “When?”

“A few days ago,” Charlie said. “I was walking home, and he just appeared out of nowhere. He said he’d seen you talking to me on the train.”

Stella said she saw us on the train, Josh thought.

“He wanted to know who I was,” Charlie continued. “He wanted to know what you and I were doing together.” She was talking more quickly now. “He accused me of… of… being some kind of bad influence on you.”

“What did you tell him?” Josh asked.

Charlie shook her head. “He was yelling,” she said. “I didn’t know what to say.” She looked at Josh. “So I ran.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I don’t know,” Charlie said.

Josh sighed. “But you told Scrawl.”

“Yes. I just wanted him to know that someone might be trying to track us,” said Charlie. “We’re supposed to tell him when—”

“What did he do?” Josh said, interrupting her. “What did Scrawl do?”

“I think he just wanted to scare him,” said Charlie.

“Scare him?” Josh said. “What, into not following you? Into forgetting that he saw us together? That doesn’t make any sense, Charlie.”

She turned away from him, saying nothing. Josh stared at her back, waiting for an answer. When she finally turned around, she was crying. “You don’t understand,” she said, wiping her nose with her hand. “But it’s not your fault. I should have told you.”

“Told me what?” Josh asked.

Charlie bit her lip. “It’s not just the game that Clatter doesn’t want anyone to know about,” she said. “There’s something else.”

“What something else?” said Josh.

Charlie crouched down and put her head in her hands. “You’re going to hate me,” she said quietly.

Josh crouched beside her. “I won’t hate you,” he told her. “But you have to tell me.”

Charlie looked at him through tear-stained eyes. “It’s the Z,” she said, her voice hoarse. “He doesn’t want anyone to know about the Z.”

It took Josh a moment to put the pieces together. “You get the Z from Clatter,” he said. “That’s it, isn’t it?”

“We all do,” said Charlie. “Everyone who plays. He makes it and gives it to us.”

“And he doesn’t want anyone to find out that he makes it,” Josh said.

“Right,” Charlie said. “He gives it to us and also sells it to his customers who bet on the game. He’s going to start selling it on the streets, too, and he’ll make a lot of money. But if anyone finds out, he’ll probably go to jail, and the game will be shut down.”

Josh stood up. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked.

Charlie stood up and pushed her hair back. “Before I tell you, you have to know something.”

Josh didn’t respond. “Everything I feel about you is real,” she said. “Everything about us is real. I’ve never lied about that.” She laughed. “Believe me, it would be easier for both of us if I were lying. But I really like you, Josh.” She paused for a long moment. “You believe me, don’t you?”

Josh looked at her worried eyes and her shaking hands. He did believe her. “I do,” he said.

“Like I said, Clatter gives Z to everyone on the team,” she said. “The only one who doesn’t take it is Scrawl. He says it makes him feel sick. Anyway, Clatter doesn’t make us pay for it, but…”

“But?” Josh encouraged her.

“But after a while he calls in a favor,” Charlie said.

Josh didn’t understand. “What kind of favor?”

“He makes us find a new person for the team,” said Charlie. “If we don’t, he cuts us off. And believe me, it isn’t pretty when that happens. Bess refused to do it, and you saw what happened to her.”

“Bess?” said Josh. “What are you talking about? He saved Bess.”

Charlie shook her head. “No, he didn’t,” she said. “He killed her because she wouldn’t recruit for him. He sent her into the tunnels knowing she wouldn’t let the rest of us die. He didn’t get to her in time, Josh. He never even tried. He let her drown.”

“No,” Josh said. “You’re lying. He wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t let one of us die.”

“He’s done it before,” Charlie said. “You don’t know what he’s really like, Josh. You have no idea.”

Josh felt the air leave his lungs. Was Charlie telling the truth? Was Bess really dead? And was Clatter responsible? He couldn’t believe it.

Then something else she’d said clicked into place. “You’re telling me you recruited me as payment to Clatter for the Z?” he asked.

Charlie nodded slowly. “Yes,” she said. “That’s what I’m telling you.”

Josh ran through the rain, not caring where he went. He just wanted to get away from Charlie. She followed him for two blocks, calling for him to stop, but he lost her by getting on a hoverbus and then, just as the doors were closing, pushing his way off through the back door. The last he’d seen of Charlie, she had her face pressed against the bus window, yelling his name.

His heart was pounding, and he felt like he might throw up. Charlie had used him to pay Clatter for her Z. If what she said was true, soon enough Clatter would demand that he do the same thing. And all this time Charlie had been telling him not to mention Z to anyone on the team. She really played me, he thought.

He looked around, trying to get his bearings. He had run eastward away from Three Sisters Square and was now a block away from Midcity Park. He could walk through it, exit through the south end, and be only a couple of blocks from his house. But how could he go home when his best friend was missing? His whole life had been sent into a tailspin.

The rain had chased most people out of the park, and the ones who remained were mainly Dusters (who never seemed to notice the weather), Boarders using the empty paths as raceways, and the occasional person walking a dog.

He stuffed his hands into his pockets, and his fingers landed on something small and hard. He pulled out the tablet of Z and looked at it. He started to throw it onto the ground, but found he couldn’t do it. Despite the hatred he had for Z at that moment, the memory of how it helped him be a better player—and how it made him feel good even when he wasn’t playing—made it impossible for him to just let go.

Instead, he took it.

As he kept walking, his mind slipped into a comforting fog. The part of Josh that worried about everything disappeared and was replaced by a feeling of invincibility. Nobody could hurt him. They would be afraid of him. The world around him became all about sensations. The rain on his skin. The smell of the air. The sounds of cars honking and voices chattering like birds. All of it swirled around in his head like a storm.

A Boarder whizzed past him, the wheels of his board clack-clack-clacking on the pavement. They tossed up water behind them, and the spray caught the light from the streetlamps and dazzled Josh’s eyes. The Boarder laughed, the sound rolling through Josh’s head like waves. He laughed too. Everything was okay now. Charlie didn’t matter. Scrawl didn’t matter. Firecracker didn’t matter.

Nothing mattered.

The peaceful feeling lasted until he reached the center of the park, where a group of Zooeys was dancing in the rain beneath a streetlamp. The frantic, pounding beat of techno music filled the air as the rabbits, cats, and kangaroos bounced up and down, their paws waving wildly and their heads going back and forth. Watching them, Josh began to feel afraid. The music seemed to wrap around his heart, replacing its steady pumping with jerky, painful lurches.