Rachel Caine - Bite Club

“Shane, I—”

“I can’t do this. Just leave me alone.”

Claire scrambled backward, through Frank’s flickering image, back until she was pressed against the cold, heavy bulk of one of the lab tables.

Then she used her cell phone to call for help.

Shane didn’t say another word to her. Not another word to anyone.

Not for days.

It had been almost a week, and Claire still felt frozen, stuck in a horrible, empty place that was full of darkness and loneliness. Eve tried to cheer her up. So did Michael. But it was the specter of Shane, who never left his room except to get food or visit the bathroom, that haunted their house now.

Shane, who hated her.

The doctors had given him good scores on his wound; with a little time and rehab, he’d be fine. Kim was going back to prison for good. Myrnin had recovered in less than two hours, drained half the cooler of blood, and looked suspiciously interested in the bloody floor where Shane had been standing. But Claire didn’t want to think about that. She hadn’t talked to him, and he hadn’t pressed.

Frank kept trying to talk to her on her phone, so she finally turned it off. Today was the first day she’d switched it back on.

There were three messages from MIT.

Claire lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling, playing them one after another on the speaker. Ms. Danvers, just calling you to see if you’ve reached a decision…. Ms. Danvers, I urgently need to hear from you by the end of the weekend if we’re to hold your place for the next term…. Ms. Danvers, I’m concerned that you haven’t returned our calls…….

She started to dial the phone. Her fingers felt numb and thick, and she wasn’t sure she wasn’t going to burst into tears, but she dialed.

He answered on the second ring. “Sir?” She’d been right; the tears threatened immediately. Claire cleared her throat. “Sir, this is Claire Danvers. I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you.”

“Oh, excellent. I’ve been waiting to hear from you,” Mr. Radamon said. “Have you worked out all your arrangements? Can we confirm you for the records? Because I have to tell you, Ms. Danvers, it’s a little puzzling that it’s taken so long to hear from you. We normally have no hesitation at all.”

Claire heard a sound at the door. Shane was standing there, looking at her. He had on a ratty old T-shirt and sweatpants, and his shoulder was still bulky with bandages. His hair looked like he’d combed it with an eggbeater…and still, she felt her heart skip and then race.

Claire sat up slowly, phone at her ear.

“About the January start,” she said, and wet her lips. “I know you need my final decision.” She was staring right into Shane’s dark eyes, waiting for a sign. Waiting for something.

He didn’t give her anything at all. But he was there . For the first time, he was there.

Claire drew in a sharp, hurting breath, and said, “I’m sorry, but I won’t be available. Thank you for considering me. If it’s possible to put my application in again next year, I will.”

“Ms. Danvers, I hope you realize that this is a very momentous decision,” Mr. Radamon said. “MIT would be very happy to have you as a student.”

“Yes, sir. Thank you.” She hesitated, and tried to put all her love into the stare she was holding with Shane. “But I need to stay here for now. I absolutely can’t leave. Not now.”

She hung up and dropped the phone on the bed.

Shane said, very quietly, “Did you do that for me?”

“Yes. And no. Because I can’t leave when you’re hurting, but I also can’t leave because there’s so much I can learn.” She took in a quick breath. “MIT can teach me amazing things, but it’ll always be there, and science isn’t a dying field. Myrnin knows things nobody else in the whole world can teach me, things that have been forgotten and need to be remembered. I know you don’t like him, but learning from him is…unique.”

“Well, that’s a point.” He didn’t have any expression yet, and his body language was guarded at best. “What else?”

“I can’t leave before Eve and Michael work out this marriage thing.”

“That could take a while.”

“And I’m not even eighteen yet. I think my parents were right all along. I don’t think I’m ready to move that far away.”

He almost smiled. “Not ready to leave Nowhere, Texas, to go off to Boston . You think that through?”

“Oh yes,” she said. “I’ve been thinking about it for days.”

“You ever think about the other answer?”

“Yes,” she said. “But not for a while now. Because there’s one more reason: I don’t want to leave you.”

Shane took a step inside her room. Just a single step. She slid off the bed and took two toward him.

And they met in the middle, not touching, just looking. Trying to find something in each other’s faces. Hungry and scared to hope.

Claire said, “I need to make this right with you, Shane. Because I love you.” She’d promised herself she wouldn’t cry, promised , but now her eyes were burning and full of tears. She didn’t let them fall as she twisted the claddagh ring from her finger and held it out to him. “But I understand if you want this back. I understand if you don’t think you can trust me. You think I betrayed you, but I didn’t. I really tried—”

“God,” Shane said. “You don’t understand me at all.”

And then he leaned forward and, with his good hand, slid the ring back on her finger. He put his forehead against hers for a moment, then kissed her. It was the sweetest, most tentative kiss he’d ever given her, and it made the tears break free, and all she could taste was salt and desperation and the silence between them…. And then his arms went around her.

“I wasn’t mad at you, and I didn’t think you betrayed me,” he said. “Not after the first few minutes. I know why you did it, why you kept it secret. You had to. You didn’t want to hurt me. I get it.”

She shuddered in relief and relaxed against him. His hand stroked her hair.

“I wish you’d told me,” he said, “but Frank was right. I’d rather it was him living in that machine, if it had to be somebody. And maybe it’s okay this way. He’s not exactly gone, but he can’t hurt me anymore. He’s just a voice. A ghost. A memory. Maybe all the best parts of my dad, and none of the worst.”

“Then why didn’t you talk to me about this?” She tried to say it reasonably, but it came out in a wail, full of pain.

“Because I wanted you to decide on your own. And I knew that if I said anything at all, you’d know how much I need you right now.”

“You need me?” She looked up at him and felt her heart speed faster.

“It’s been the toughest week of my life, not touching you. Not talking to you. Waiting to see what you were going to do.” He kissed her again, a warm, damp touch of lips, exquisitely controlled. “But it doesn’t matter whether you stay or go. I’ll still need you. So if you want to go off to Boston, I’ll wait. Right here, whenever you need me.”

Claire smiled against the press of his lips and felt him smiling, too. It was like the sun coming out after all the long, cold days.

“You know what?” she murmured. “I need you right now.”

His voice dropped lower. “Now?”

“Right now.”

“Oh,” Shane said, and backed her slowly toward the bed. “That’s so exactly what I was going to say.”

“Jinxies,” she whispered, but the word was lost between them when he kissed her, so hot and sweet.

And once again…she liked his version better.

In case you want to listen along to the songs I used to help me write this book, here they are! Buy the tracks, please. Don’t be a vampire preying on the artists.