“I’ll fetch it for you.” On returning, Greydusk handed me Chance’s pack, and went on, “With your permission, I’ll pursue some leads on my own. There are sources I dare not trust in your actual presence but who might be moved to part with information.”
“Are we safe here?”
The Imaron considered. “The protections should be sufficient against most would-be intruders. Don’t answer the door. Don’t invite anyone in.”
“That matters? I thought it was only for vampires.”
Greydusk flashed a mouthful of sharp teeth. “Ah, but the legends take their lore from us. It does, indeed, matter to the Dohan, the Drinkers.”
Drinkers. There was no question it meant what I thought. But apparently I had to be dumb enough to say, C’mon in and crack open some A-positive. Of course, the way I’d been going, I understood why the demon would warn me against the obvious.
“Go on. I’ll be careful,” I promised.
Once he left, I felt relieved. I didn’t want a witness to my bizarre conversation with my genius dog. Some things were too weird even for demons. I set Butch down, alongside the scrambled tiles. He pawed at them with adorable concentration, fumbling the letters with his tiny paws. When he finished, I read:
Theres a bad spirit in you
Hmm. “Do you mean the demon queen?” He had been in the room when Greydusk had explained how the Old King gained his gifts, but who knew if Butch had been paying attention?
Positive yap.
“Could you see her in me before?” God, I felt dumb, though you’d imagine I would be used to this by now.
Two barks equaled no .
“So coming to Sheol changed everything. Awesome.”
He went to work on the tiles again. New message. Its growing
My blood chilled. “When? If I use demon magick?”
All the time
Every moment I spent in the demon realm, the more power the queen gained over me. Soon it might be her in charge all the time and me screaming helplessly in my own head. Likely the demons had known—or at least suspected—it would come to this. So the ones who wanted me to do something to wreck the natural order? They only had to get me here. It was an insidious scheme, worthy of a cunning mind. If they could delay me long enough, they won.
There was nothing I could do about it now, though.
“Thanks for the warning, bud.” My expression must have been hopeless because Butch nuzzled my leg until I picked him up.
Then he licked my cheek. He only did that when things got impressively awful. I stroked his spine in deliberate, dragging motions, and then scratched behind his ears, which he loved. He forgot he was supposed to be consoling me and rolled over to demand a belly rub. I obliged for long moments, trying not to look too far down the dark path ahead of me. When I stopped, Butch stepped off my lap to curl up next to me. Being such a smart dog, he knew I had work to do.
I put away the letter tiles and then applied myself to the next order of business. I hoped Chance would brood for a while. Once I started handling Shannon’s things, well, any wild emotional reactions I preferred to keep to myself. Maybe I could salvage whatever dignity I had left. I didn’t brace hard; I just wrapped my fingers around her blue toothbrush and let the images come. This time the charge wasn’t strong enough to pull me in.
Instead, it showed a fleeting moment, sparkling bright, like a sunny day at the beach. Shannon leaned over the sink in Jesse’s bathroom in one of his shirts. As she brushed her teeth, he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Nuzzled her neck, and she turned, smiling. The toothbrush clattered to the sink and I lost the thread.
Nothing that can help me. But it was good seeing them both happy. It offset some of the pain still swirling from earlier.
Next, I tried the clothing, but there was nothing. Likewise with Shan’s laptop. It wasn’t the sort of personal possession that lent itself to emotional resonance. Nudging faint guilt aside, I skimmed her e-mails and browser history, hoping to feel closer to her. I wanted to know what I’d missed about her life these past months. Pretty quickly, I formed a picture.
Chuch and Eva had helped her find a place while they rebuilt. One of his many cousins needed a roommate, and Shan fit the bill. She’d gotten a job selling clothes at the mall, which she didn’t love, but it paid the rent. At night, she studied for her GED, and two weeks ago, she’d passed the test. She had an e-mail from Eva, congratulating her. In her DOWNLOADS folder I found a couple of PDFs from Laredo Community College. One contained fee info and the other was an admissions application.
Wow . I was so fucking proud of her.
And there were random notes from Jesse, too, showing the evolution of their relationship. At first just short and quick, uncertain almost, as if he didn’t understand why she was on his mind. They got gradually longer, and then I read, Dinner was amazing. And breakfast was even better. That had to be their first night together. I felt like a spy then, and I closed the computer.
Where are you, Shan?
I wished I had the ability to connect with her, mind to mind, but I knew no spells that permitted it, only natural gifts. Some people were born telepaths, but I wasn’t. Which meant I had to do this the hard way. Fine. With a faint sigh, I packed up her things and zipped the backpack we’d bought together. Afterward, I sat with my eyes closed, thinking, hoping Greydusk returned with a vital lead, as I had nothing, a galling admission.
Later, Chance came down to join me. I heard his steps but I didn’t open my eyes. What he had to say wouldn’t be fun to hear, but there was no point in putting it off. I steeled myself for a twist on the breakup speech. This time, accurately, it would be It’s not me, it’s you .
“Corine.” His tone throbbed a demand: Look at me .
So I did. I owed him that much, even if he broke my heart again. This time, I didn’t blame him.
“Yeah?”
“I don’t care about the demon stuff.”
I froze. Ran my fingers through my hair in stunned reaction.
He went on. “I don’t even know who my father is. And it’s clear something’s happening to me here too. I love you. And I’ll stand by you, even in this.” His charming, disarming smile flashed. “If the worst comes to pass, if you ascend as the demon queen, I’ll figure out some way to keep you happy, because there’s no way in hell I’m letting anybody else take my place as your consort.”
“Holy shit,” I breathed. “You’d do that? Why?”
“Because I’ve seen what life is like without you.”
“But you’d meet someone else—”
“Don’t you think I tried? You were gone eighteen months before I came looking that first time. Until Min vanished, I had decided to let you go.”
“For my own good,” I muttered.
“Well, yeah. I dated. But never more than once with the same woman. I was empty. Broken. When I had a reason to find you, I did. I was so glad to see you, even under the circumstances. Because in that time, I never found anyone who clicked with me like you. Now that we’re together again, I’m not leaving you. Ever.”
“It won’t come to that. I’ll do better at reining her in…and I won’t drink any more weird potions against your advice.”
“I understand why you did,” he said. “But your recklessness scares the shit out of me, love. Sometimes I think you don’t care if you live or die. You play chicken with the universe.”
I didn’t—couldn’t—deny it. Instead, I reached for him and when his arms went around me, I luxuriated in his familiar, comforting heat, the lovely cadence of a heartbeat that had lulled me to sleep in years past. “What’s your last name?” I asked.
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