Ann Aguirre: Devil's Punch

She’d given me a fleeting smile. “I’m too old to care about such things, child. I don’t have much longer, and I choose to spend those days helping you. At least you’re willing to do my shopping when my legs hurt. That’s more than I can say for Juanita Lopez.”

I’d laughed, because Juanita was one of the worst; she’d hated me since my return. Before, she’d paid no attention to me at all. Apparently, my mother’s magick made me register on their visual radars well, whereas the touch had permitted me to run silent. Now I was a marked target.

With effort, I put the dark thoughts aside. Tia had been kind to me. I would make sure she didn’t suffer. She’d helped me with the grimoires I inherited from my mother, explaining various techniques. And she teased me mercilessly about Chance. He was good with her from experience with his own mother, Min.

“You should keep this one,” Tia would say. “You’ll make beautiful babies.”

I always laughed. It was almost—almost—enough to make me forget other pain. But I’d lost so much. Jesse, my almost-boyfriend, who didn’t remember me. My best friend, Shannon, who I missed even more than the man I’d thought I might love. In Laredo, I’d cast a forget spell—and screwed it up, giving the charm too much power—and fogged myself right out of their minds. Deep down I hoped the phone would ring soon. That the effect would wear off, and they’d both yell at me, and then everything could go back to the way it was.

But we don’t always get what we wish for. So far, my cell phone had been silent. No Shannon. No Jesse. And for obvious reasons, no Kel. He wasn’t—couldn’t—be here. It was awful that I wanted him to be, even a little bit, with Chance craving my attention. Kel wasn’t for me; rationally, I knew that. He was Nephilim, committed to fighting for all eternity. He didn’t have a life apart from his orders, and so there was nothing for me with him. It had been around two months since I’d seen him, three weeks since I’d come home. I shouldn’t be thinking of him. I should file our brief connection under MISTAKES I’VE MADE, or more accurately, THINGS I WANT BUT CAN’T HAVE.

Yet I found myself looking for him. Searching the crowd for him. Sure, I could call him, but what would I say? Hi. Missed you. Killed anybody amusing lately? You just didn’t trifle with someone who reported to archangels. So I remembered and I missed him and tried to put the pieces back together. Too bad they’d all been broken into jagged shapes that cut when I tried to connect the edges.

“You all right?” Chance asked, coming up beside me.

The mountains were beautiful, dark green and pointed like weapons against the darkening sky. Where I’d grown up, it was relatively flat and the countryside tended toward swampland. Until coming here, I’d never lived at high altitude. It changed everything from cooking to taking a walk. Everything felt like more of an achievement at seven thousand feet.

Including moving day.

I nodded. “Just tired. You fit a lot of boxes in the Mustang.”

“I’m a good packer. We used to move around a lot.”

“You and Min?”

His silence felt like an affirmative. Then I wondered why I didn’t know more about him, why I’d permitted his reticence. A woman more confident of her self-worth wouldn’t; she’d insist on learning about her lover. And if he didn’t care to share, she’d move on, looking for someone who wanted to be a partner, not a manager. The mistakes in our rearview didn’t all belong to Chance.

At length, he offered, “I think she was hiding from someone.”

“Your father…or the Montoyas?”

“Both? Min doesn’t talk about the past much.”

“And you didn’t press her.”

He shook his head. “I never wanted to disappoint her. She’d get this look, like I should know better than to ask. Like it was…impolite.”

“Maybe it’s a cultural thing?”

“What I’ve read suggests that it is. Which is weird—that I’m reading what it’s like to be Korean, but I’m American…and I’ve learned what I know about relating to people from my mom.”

“Did she ever have a boyfriend when you were growing up?”

Chance laughed. “Never. Not that they didn’t try. But she always seemed like she was waiting.”

“For your dad to come back?”

“I don’t know. I’m sorry if this is frustrating, but some of it I really don’t know. She tried to give me a normal American childhood, as much as she could, as much as we could afford.”

“Well, at least you’re telling me straight out that you don’t have the answers,” I said, smiling. “That’s more than I got before.”

“True.”

“Let’s unpack a little more, and then I’ll get us something to eat.”

The nice thing about the neighborhood, there were several tortillerias and taquerias within a couple of blocks, where I could buy rice and beans. The taco joints stayed open super-late, too, as they were a favorite of the college drinking crowd.

“Will you sleep over?” he asked.

I laughed. “You don’t even have a bed. But nice try.” In truth, he had little furniture. The Mustang carried his personal belongings, his books and clothes, but it couldn’t hold a sofa. “I’ll take you shopping tomorrow in the El Camino. I should be able to fit what you need, if we make multiple trips.”

“Thank you, Corine.”

I didn’t know what he was thanking me for—the offer of help or the second chance between us—but when he leaned down to kiss me, I forgot to wonder. His mouth tasted of tea and lemon with a hint of salt. It was a sweet nothing of a kiss, full of hope and expectation. Happiness swirled through me, despite everything I’d lost.

I forced myself to sound brisk. “If you had your way, we’d make out on the floor all night. Get to work.”

He grinned, shameless and beautiful, and my heart fluttered. The last of the light shone on his raven-dark hair, limning it blue. In profile, he was still the best thing I’d ever seen. I didn’t want to love him again; I feared it, but he had a siren’s call bound up in his tiger eyes and tawny skin. With Chance, I suspected—in the end—I would walk into the water, smiling, and let it close over my head.

An hour later I finished putting away his kitchen things, so at least we’d have cups and plates. The previous tenant had left some rusty wrought-iron patio furniture on the balcony, so we’d eat there, watching the sunset. I let myself out while Chance hung clothing in the bedroom. I ran lightly down the stairs; the hundred pesos in my pocket would more than buy our dinner.

The taqueria was two blocks down the hill. After passing the gate, I jogged them easily; thanks to my time in the jungle with Kel, passing Escobar’s test, I was fitter than I had been in years.

Because the food was good, there were a few people waiting outside. The man at the counter took my order and then I joined the queue. I got tacos al pastor, rice, and beans. Takeaway came in simple containers and wrapped in paper. I cradled the bag against my chest and retraced my steps. The security guy recognized me and didn’t demand my ID this time. He opened the gate just wide enough for me to slip through and then I headed for Chance’s flat. He met me at the door and relieved me of our repast, carrying it out to the balcony without being asked.

I guessed he realized there was nowhere else to eat. But in my absence, he’d fixed up the area with a couple of potted plants, cushions Min had embroidered, and candles. With the sun setting over the mountains, it was breathtaking.

“You approve?”

“Absolutely. I can’t believe you managed all this so fast.”

He winked. “Not a problem. I just unpacked the box labeled ‘Seduction.’”