Glen Cook - Cruel Zinc Melodies

Took me a second to get it. I had to go back to the islands, us moving from one hellhole to the next aboard troop transports.

Singe left the room as we entered. She returned with a new mug and the pitcher refilled. Block accepted the mug. He didn’t mind it having been touched by a ratperson.

He took a long drink. ‘‘That’s good.’’ He eyed the Dead Man.

‘‘He’s asleep,’’ I lied. That being Old Bones’s preferred state.

‘‘I don’t believe you. But it doesn’t matter. The world is at peace. I hope winter never ends. So, what do you have going?’’ He looked at John Stretch.

I saw no reason not to tell him. He wouldn’t believe me, anyway.

I didn’t betray John Stretch’s secret power. The Crown doesn’t need to know everything. Especially if that might cause feelings of vulnerability.

‘‘Giant bugs? You’re shitting me.’’

‘‘I might be. By accident. I only saw one. But it was huge. I’m more worried about the ghosts.’’

‘‘Why would there be ghosts around there?’’

‘‘I don’t know. An old burial ground?’’

‘‘With the tenants just now getting disgruntled? Be rational. The usual reasons ghosts jump up would’ve brought them out a long time ago.’’

I’d spotted that flaw on my own. ‘‘Weider thinks it might be somebody angling for a payoff.’’

‘‘Villains. Breathing villains. Stupid, breathing villains.’’

We were getting sloppy already.

Possibly with a little subtle assistance.

I closed the door behind the colonel. ‘‘What was that all about, Chuckles?’’

He was passing by. Feeling lonely. Colonel Block will not admit it, especially to himself, but he is a lonely man. He may have created an adversarial relationship here but it is a relationship.

None of which was alive in his surface mind.

Another day, half of it wasted on morning. I wakened early, feeling good, and couldn’t go back to sleep. I ambled down to the kitchen, where I surprised Dean, though he wouldn’t admit it. He just poured tea and started the eggs and sausage. ‘‘This could turn into a habit.’’

‘‘A good one, I’m sure you’ll argue.’’

He wasted no breath responding. ‘‘There was a message from Miss Weider.’’

‘‘Um? What does she want?’’

‘‘To know why you haven’t cleaned up the world.’’ He seemed both amused and puzzled.

‘‘It’s a big place. And I don’t run so fast anymore.’’

‘‘I’m sure that isn’t what she meant.’’

‘‘That kid Penny still running messages?’’

‘‘I wouldn’t be surprised. But I don’t know how to get hold of her.’’

‘‘Figures.’’

‘‘You need a message carried?’’

‘‘I do. To Playmate.’’

‘‘There’s a new family moved in down by the corner. They have a boy who could do it. Joe Kerr. He seems like a good kid.’’

I gave him the look. ‘‘You’re kidding.’’

‘‘What? How?’’

‘‘Joe Kerr?’’

‘‘Yes? So? There’s a problem with that?’’

‘‘Maybe not. Maybe it’s just me. Is he trustworthy?’’

He shrugged. ‘‘I trust people till they give me reason not to.’’

‘‘I’ve noticed. But see if you can recruit him.’’

‘‘Me?’’

‘‘They very one. He knows you. He’d think I’m some pervert trying to pull him in.’’

‘‘I can see how he’d think that. You have that look.’’

I speared a sausage and ignored him, except to say, ‘‘Round him up. As soon as you can.’’

I met the kid on the stoop. He was nine or ten. There was nothing remarkable about him. Wild red hair. Freckles. Big ears and fat front teeth. Gray-green eyes. Ragged clothes. Nervous smile. I gave him two coppers, the message, and instructions on how to get to Playmate’s stable. ‘‘Three more coppers when you bring back an answer.’’

‘‘Yes, sir.’’ Off he went. He acquired an escort of three younger siblings before he got to the intersection with Wizard’s Reach.

Singe wandered into my office. ‘‘Playmate is here.’’

‘‘His own self? Already?’’

‘‘Yes. And yes. I’m off to get John Stretch. Close the door behind me.’’

Instead, I closed the door behind me. Playmate couldn’t leave his coach unattended. A coach that wasn’t his to lose. He has a mildly disreputable penchant for borrowing vehicles left in his care. Sometimes to help me. We’ve been fortunate enough not to destroy one yet. But one time we did forget to take a body out.

Play brought the children back. The message kid met me with both hands out. I paid even though he hadn’t brought a message.

‘‘What’s this?’’ I asked Playmate. Indicating the huge, burr-headed man leaning on the mahogany coachwork. Play hadn’t left the driver’s seat. ‘‘How you doing, Saucerhead? What’re you doing here?’’

‘‘I was over to Play’s when your message come. I didn’t have nothing to do. Any shit involving you usually gets entertaining. So I decided to tag along.’’

Probably hoping to pick up a few loose coins himself.

Saucerhead Tharpe isn’t quite as big as Playmate. And not much smarter than the horses pulling that coach. But he is more social. Than both. And he’s handy to have around.

People don’t argue with Saucerhead. Not for long.

‘‘I’m not hiring,’’ I said. ‘‘Not right now.’’

Tharpe shrugged. His shoulders were mountain ranges heaving. He needed new clothes to cover them. A bath would contribute something positive, too. And a date with a razor would help. ‘‘Don’t matter, Garrett. I’m not working. Not right now.’’

‘‘You’ll be the first to hear when I do need help.’’

‘‘Yeah.’’ He scowled. He knew where I’d turn first. ‘‘Thanks.’’

I throw work his way when I can. He’s a good friend, long on loyalty but short on critical life skills. He never learned how to think about tomorrow.

‘‘Tag along if you want. I’m just gonna shake some bugs out of a place Old Man Weider is building.’’

‘‘You in the extermination racket now?’’

‘‘Not quite. These are special bugs. Here they come.’’ Meaning Singe, John Stretch, and several of Stretch’s associates. Each lugging a clever wicker cage filled with quarrelsome critters. Up close, those were the nastiest rats I ever saw. Pit bull rats. Champion fighting cock rats. I grumbled, ‘‘Did you need to bring the ones that are foaming at the mouth?’’

Singe countered, ‘‘There you go, exaggerating again. Hello, Mr. Tharpe. How is Grosziella?’’

Grosziella? Who would that be?

‘‘We broke up. I . . .’’ Saucerhead launched a tale told many times. The names change but he keeps connecting, and disconnecting, with the same woman. They could wear the same underwear.

John Stretch told me, ‘‘I thought you would want enthusiasm.’’ The last word arrived in a flurry of lisps.

‘‘As long as they save it for the bugs. Everybody set? You bringing all these handlers?’’

‘‘Have to. Too many rats for me to manage alone.’’

Singe said, ‘‘I need to run inside for a minute.’’

I told John Stretch, ‘‘I don’t see how we can get them and the cages all inside the coach.’’ I watched Singe climb the steps. She’s worse than Tinnie, sometimes. And Tinnie must have a bladder the size of a grape.

John Stretch and his crew began unloading cages.

I frowned at the World. Construction had stopped. ‘‘Am I missing a holiday? Did the weekend sneak up on me?’’

I went looking for Handsome. I found a pair of Civil Guards instead. They were all shiny and self-important in the new, pale blue uniforms. They wore red flop hats and brandished tin whistles.