Richelle Mead - THORN QUEEN

He gave me a small, sad smile. “Are you sure? Or are you the Storm Queen?”

I frowned. “What?”

“That’s what you told Leith. Back in the kitchen.”

“No.” So much of those memories were fragmented, but I was certain I’d recall that. “I told him I was the Thorn Queen a few times-but good God. Not Storm Queen.”

“I heard you. Once you said Storm Queen.”

I shook my head, anger returning. “You made a mistake. They sound alike. Easy to mishear.”

His smile twitched; his sadness grew. “Not with my hearing.”

Kiyo left after that-to where, I didn’t know. It didn’t matter. My heart was broken, and thinking about him too much was only going to make things worse. Instead, I knew I had to leave too. I had to get out of here-and I knew exactly where I had to go.

I had to go to my kingdom.

When I crossed over to the castle in the Thorn Land, I was surprised to find Nia sitting on the floor beside my rabbit paperweight. Her knees were drawn up, and her face-which appeared tear-streaked-rested on her knees. Yet, when she saw me, her face lit up like the sun bursting from behind clouds.

“Your majesty!” she cried, springing up. “Some of them said…they said you wouldn’t come back. But I knew. I knew you would.”

The devotion in the girl’s eyes was startling. Nia had been another servant passed from Dorian, and it had never occurred to me that she would serve me out of such love.

“Of course I came back,” I said softly. “Why wouldn’t I?”

She averted her eyes. “After everything that happened, and…well, because of Queen Katrice. There are those who assumed you’d abandon us and stay in the world of the humans.”

I didn’t bother pointing out that abandoning this land would kill me. I was too shocked by something else. “They thought…they thought I’d just start a war and leave?”

“I knew you wouldn’t,” she said fervently. “I knew you wouldn’t.”

I gave her a small, comforting smile while a knot twisted in my stomach. “Take me to Shaya and Rurik.”

The two of them were surprised by my arrival, but something told me they hadn’t doubted I would return either. I could tell by the compassion on Shaya’s face that what Leith had done to me was common knowledge. To my surprise, it was Rurik I took the most comfort from. He didn’t question my appearance. He offered no sympathies. He simply jumped straight to business.

“We’ve gathered as many soldiers as we could while you’ve been gone,” he said. “Some are camped outside, and Dorian’s said he’ll send reinforcements-his military’s much larger. The majority of yours is in Highmore. We’ll need to determine the best way to distribute them.”

For a moment, I felt dizzy as he continued rattling off military strategy. What was going on? What was I doing? I was a girl from Tucson who’d grown up in a middle-class neighborhood. How on earth was I standing here, listening to a fairy soldier explain how to lead a war?

I held up a hand. “Wait…before you go any further. Is there…is there any way this can be avoided?” Kiyo’s words came back to me, and I hated to say what I did next. “Is there any way to make peace?”

Rurik’s eyes widened, and shock and anger filled his features. “Peace? After what-”

Shaya silenced him with a gesture of her own. “Yes, actually. Katrice sent a rather long letter about it.”

“So…we could get her to understand that it…” Was an accident? Hardly. “I mean, could Katrice let all of this go, considering Leith started it?”

Shaya cleared her throat uncomfortably, and Rurik looked angry. “Well,” she began, “not entirely. For Katrice not to go to war, she demands that we become her subject kingdom and has very specific details on the kinds of tribute and taxes she requires for that. She also…she also says that you must marry her nephew in place of her son and tie this kingdom to her through that branch of the family. My impression is she sent a similar list of demands to Dorian-aside from the nephew part-which he refused rather, ah, indelicately.”

I stared, my mouth agape. That was not what I had in mind. How could Katrice demand those kinds of things after what Leith had done? How dare she act as though I had done something wrong? Yes, I could imagine her grief for her only son. I wasn’t that heartless. Yet…what she was suggesting was ludicrous. And if she thought I would ever, ever let another member of her family lay a hand on me…

I turned back to Rurik as though the issue of peace with Katrice had never been mentioned. Later, I would ask Shaya to help me compose a formal response to Katrice’s letter, something along the lines of I am the Thorn Queen. Fuck off.

“What should I do next?” I asked Rurik.

He smiled, a fierce delight in his eyes. “You should speak to the soldiers gathered here and make an official declaration of war. And then you should go to Highmore and speak to the ones there. They don’t even know you as their queen yet, let alone the person sending them to fight. And you should practice up on your magic, both for battle and to show your own people that that Rowan bitch can’t touch you.”

I shivered at the feelings his words inspired in me. In Tucson, I’d been trying to hide from my magic, but now it was calling to me again. And with this threat from Katrice-no, this insult from Katrice-there was nothing I wanted more than to summon all the forces of nature and rip her apart.

“Dorian is coming here-today, I think,” said Shaya, interrupting my murderous thoughts. “Follow his lead. He knows what to do.”

I wasn’t entirely sure what that meant. The only thing I felt certain of was that I wasn’t quite ready to go over the maps Rurik had laid out and examine all the troop placements he had in mind. I’d always sucked at Risk and had a feeling this would be similar. Besides, I hadn’t returned to the Thorn Land to make war-not right at this second, at least. I’d come because of the dream from last night, the dream where I’d felt at peace.

Because at the moment, I felt no peace. A gentry queen wanted to lead armies in and kill my people-and I was supposed to do the same to her. I’d just broken up with my boyfriend, someone I loved dearly, because I-possibly irrationally-held him responsible for not protecting me from an assailant. And as for that assailant…well, his face still flashed in my mind, and no matter how much time passed, I couldn’t seem to rid myself of that dirty feeling within me or my repulsion at being touched.

I swore to Rurik that I’d talk to him later, that I needed some time to myself first, and left them both for one of the castle’s enclosed gardens. It was the one I frequently meditated in, where Shaya was still attempting to grow grass and where Kiyo and I had made love. I sat down there cross-legged, taking in the sun on the orange rocks around me and relishing in the faint breeze that stirred the branches of the mesquite and smokethorn trees. A tiny lizard scurried off behind a rock, and I heard what sounded like a hummingbird-or a big-ass bee-in a cluster of nearby flowers.

I cleared my mind and tried to communicate with and heal the land like I had before, but for whatever reason, the connection didn’t come. Panic seized me. Had the events with Leith broken something within me? Had I lost my ability to revive the kingdom? I sat there sweating, wondering what would happen to the land if I couldn’t connect to it. The heat eventually made me sleepy, and I lay down on the grass, my hands digging into the earth.

When I woke up, two things immediate became apparent. First, I felt…better. I felt strong and refreshed, and all around me, the colors and scents seemed stronger and more vivid. I still wasn’t happy about the impending war, but that horrible feeling in me…the bitterness Leith had left…well, it had lessened. The air hummed around me, and for a disorienting second, I couldn’t tell where I ended and the land began. It was then that I realized why my meditation hadn’t worked. I had been in no condition to heal the land. It had had to heal me. I was energized now, ready to do anything. Ready to lead a war.