James Galloway - The Tower of Sorcery

"Make time," Tarrin said. "Because I don't think I'll get to the last stage of the Initiate."

That made the Council stare at him, then glance at each other nervously. "And what nonsense is this?" the Keeper asked.

"I don't have to stay," he told her bluntly. "The latter stages of the Initiate are for those who go on to become katzh-dashi . I have no intention of becoming katzh-dashi . After I'm taught how to control my power without hurting anyone, I'll be leaving. So I'll never reach that stage of the training."

It was technically true, anyway.

"Well, if you must know, when a katzh-dashi serves for a period of ten years, they take the Vows of the Goddess. When we do that, we simply stop aging," she said calmly. "It's one of the gifts given to us by the Goddess. Master Brel there came to us as a middle aged man when he began his Initiate. How he appears now is how he appeared when he took his Vows."

And that answered that. The Goddess stopped their aging, and when they were no longer technically mortal, she could bestow her blessings upon them. Making a katzh-dashi stop aging wasn't a gift, it was more like a change so they could receive their true gifts. It was just a change with beneficial side-effects. It explained why most of them looked mature, in their thirties or early fourties. Some took years to pass the Initiate, and that would make them middle-aged after their ten years of service.

"Now, enough silliness," the Keeper said. "Come sit on the table, Tarrin. We're going to try a few experiments to see what limit your power has. I promise you that you won't have to touch the Weave without being restricted in some way. And if you feel anything unusual while trying, you're free to stop and let us know. We don't want this to be painful for you."

"Alright," he said suspiciously.

That began a very curious morning, where the Council would cut him off from the Weave at varying strengths before he tried to make contact with it. And unlike the previous attempts, this time the Council could manage his power, if but for a few moments. By reducing his ability to touch the Weave, it lengthened the amount of time he had before the power that tried to flood him could wear away at the barrier they placed in front of it. They had tried stopping that flood while it was in progress the time before. This time they put obstructions in front of it before it could really get moving.

But it was still no solution. It took the combined might of the Council to slow the flood by a moment or two, but it did give Tarrin long enough to perform a few simple weaves, and it gave him time to let go of the Weave before that flood hit him and neutralized his ability to separate himself from his magic. He was very careful not to let it catch him; the pain of tearing himself away was enough to make it something to avoid if at all possible. And the Council, fully understanding that their circle was in very real danger should Tarrin get overwhelmed, were also very careful to be ready to break the instant Tarrin did get overwhelmed.

After a morning of such careful, delicate probing and experimentation, they had found that Tarrin's raw power could be briefly contained by a barrier. They had studied how his power worked, and the Keeper had promised him that the six Lorefinders in attendance, of whom Brel was part, would study that and try to come up with a new, more effective barrier that they could use for him to help him control that power.

The Keeper leaned back in her chair, rubbing her eyes. The lunch bell had just sounded on the grounds, and the Council looked a bit harried. It was real work for them to use their power to control Tarrin's, so he could do what the Lorefinders asked. "I think this is a good stopping point," she said. "We've made real progress today."

"Yes," a dark-haired Sorceress, Lilenne, said. She was the Mistress Loremaster, the lead of that organization of knowledge-seeking katzh-dashi . She was a Shacean, with a thin, graceful neck and a swallow's eyes. She was pretty, but there was a sharpness to her features that Tarrin found a bit unnerving. She looked like a bird of prey. "We have made good progress, yes? I think we can find a control solution for you, Tarrin. Maybe something that you can even use for yourself to give you more time, yes."

"I'd appreciate it," Tarrin said sincerely. "I can't learn if I can't use the Weave, and I can't get out of here if I can't learn."

"Yes, well, a solution, we will work on that for you, yes. Have no worry. I notice you use our library."

"It's a good way to study what I can, Mistress."

"A good attitude, yes," she said with a hawkish smile. "Come to the library tonight. A book, I will give to you, on High Sorcery. Maybe it will help."

"Is that wise, Lilenne?" the Keeper asked.

"High Sorcery, it is his domain, Keeper," she replied calmly. "If he can access it alone, then he should learn as much about it as possible, because nobody will be there to help him. Mistakes, it will help him avoid them. Best he be armed with everything he can, yes?"

"You're the Lorefinder, Lilenne," Amelyn told her. "We will accede to your judgement in the matter."

"Tomorrow," she told Tarrin, looking at him, "be here at sunrise. We will keep working."

"Yes, Mistress Lilenne," he said respectfully.

"You are excused, Initiate," the Keeper told him. "You have done well today."

"Thank you," he said, scooting off the table.

It wasn't as long as he thought it would be, but he definitely felt it. He was tired, both from effort and from fear. He was afraid of Sorcery, because he knew what was waiting for him if he was flooded. That pain was something nobody could ever get used to, and it was pain that he would avoid at all costs. Only if threatened with more pain than he would feel tearing himself away from the Weave would he subject himself to that kind of punishment. The morning of feeling it right on the edge of him had exacted a toll, and he felt drained by the time he walked out the door.

He thought about the Goddess' riddle for him, and its solution. So she had worked a way around the restriction for her people, but why was it so important to him that she would send him off to find out why? It really didn't make much sense. After all, he never intended to become katzh-dashi , and it wasn't like that would do him any good anyway. Maybe she was just testing him, to see how observant or how smart he was. Maybe she wanted him to know for some other reason, something that he couldn't comprehend. The Goddess was obviously trying to carefully set him up for something, but unlike the katzh-dashi , he trusted the Goddess. If she wanted him to do something for her, he probably would.

Miranda's wise words about a person occassionally having to give up personal need to fulfill the needs of others rang in his mind for some reason. Maybe the Goddess needed something from him, and because he was one of her children, he would have to try to fulfill it for her.

Maybe everything she was doing, and everything around him, was preparing him for the choice that she said he would have to make. And that choice would involve whose needs he would strive to fulfill.

The thought occupied his mind as he went to the kitchens and fixed himself a plate for lunch, then sat down in the small Inititate's dining hall and pondered on it. Because he was so preoccupied, Dar managed to sit down at his table before he scented or noticed the young man, and that startled him. His claws were out and halfway across the table before the young man flinched, but they stopped well short of his nose.

"Don't do that!" Tarrin gasped as he pulled his paw back. " Never sneak up on me, Dar! It's dangerous!"