Robert Asprin: Dragons deal

"How difficult is it to get to be royalty on a float?" Mai asked, speculatively.

"Just about impossible," Fox Lisa said. "Unless you have been a member of the krewe for years and years, and it's come around to your turn, then maybe if everyone is willing to vote for you. Or you drew the lucky ticket in a random drawing. It varies a lot how krewes pick the king. The only outsiders who are ever asked to be king are usually celebrities." She beamed at Griffen. "That means you've been accepted as a local, Griffen. Congratulations!"

"What's the congratulations about?" Maestro asked, coming up for air from his discussion.

"Griffen's going to be a Mardi Gras king!" Fox Lisa exclaimed. "Oh, I am so happy for you!"

"What krewe?" Maestro asked.

"Fafnir," Griffen said.

"That one's been defunct for years," Maestro said, with a lift of his eyebrow. "Did they say why they're reviving it instead of starting a new krewe?"

Griffen shook his head. "I guess I can ask all that at their meeting on Tuesday," he said. "I don't know much yet, only that it's going to cost me a bundle."

"Do it anyhow," Maestro advised. "It's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. I can't believe you're even hesitating."

"Neither can I," said Val. "It's not like you."

"It's a pretty expensive proposition," Griffen said.

"So what is money for?" Mai asked. "If it is something you will enjoy, spend it. I would."

Griffen looked at the eager faces around him. "Well, okay," he said, with a huge show of reluctance.

"You phony!" Val said, laughing. Griffen grinned back.

"That's better," Mai said, studying him critically. "If it does you good in the community, it sounds like a worthwhile opportunity."

"Well, it's got responsibilities, too," Griffen said.

"Purely ceremonial," Maestro said, sitting back with his drink in his hand. The second and subsequent drinks of the night were always Diet Coke. He raised the glass. "Cheers, King of Fafnir. Just one question: Who's your queen?"

Griffen felt his eyebrows lift. "Queen?"

"Yes. Not all krewes have 'em, but if I recall correctly, Fafnir had both a king and queen."

Griffen frowned. "I don't know anything about that. Won't they ask someone, just like they asked me?"

"Not necessarily," Fox Lisa said, her eyes shining. "Sometimes the king gets free choice. Did Etienne tell you?"

"No," Griffen said, though he wasn't a hundred percent certain. The conversation he had had was a faint noise in his memory underneath the sounds of saws, planes, hammering, and shouting. He had been far more interested in the intricate floats.

"Maybe he just didn't mention it," Val said. "He probably thought you were going to go away and think about it."

"Wow," Griffen said, sipping his whisky. "Maybe."

"Who would you choose?" Mai asked. Griffen almost choked on the mouthful. That had not been a casual question. He looked up. The eyes of all three women drilled into him. Griffen, a practiced poker player, concentrated on looking noncommittal.

"Me?" he asked.

"Well, they usually choose a local," Fox Lisa said eagerly. "I've lived in New Orleans all my life. I'd do it if you wanted. I'd love it."

"But they want a highborn dragon for king," Mai said. "That means they would want the same for their queen. I would be an excellent choice."

"But I'm your sister," Val said. "My bloodline is the same as yours, Griffen. You should tell them I'm interested."

"The king and queen as brother and sister? That sounds like incest," Mai said, her eyes aglow. "It would be far more logical to ask me."

"It might not have anything to do with that!" Griffen said. He realized what kind of a minefield that Maestro had led him into, and from the amused glint in the older man's eyes, he had done it on purpose. "Look, it's premature to get into a discussion about it. I hardly know a thing. Why don't we just forget about it for now and talk about it after I've had a chance to ask Etienne."

"That's right," Fox Lisa said. She ducked under Val's arm and cuddled up against Griffen's shoulder. Her fingers played with the top buttons of Griffen's shirt. She looked up at him coyly. "We were gonna go listen to music, then go home. Why don't we get going?"

"That's a good idea," Mai said, taking Griffen's other arm. "We'll go and have some fun."

Val looked disgruntled. Griffen remembered that Mai had come in with her and had been planning to spend the evening with her.

"We could all go," he offered. "I hear Beth Patterson's on tonight. She said her new CD might be ready by this week."

"No," Val said, her eyes sparking. "I'm going home. If I can't count on support from my own brother, then I just want to be by myself for a while." The air trembled with tension.

Griffen had had his fair share of Val's melodrama when they were teenagers, but with the advent of her dragon powers and her pregnancy, the pout took on a more frightening attitude. She had enough control not to grow to giant size right there in the bar, but the resident dogs rose from under Griffen's bar stool and retreated to the corner, whimpering. He had better intercede before the human denizens joined them.

"Come on," Griffen said, with his most persuasive smile. "I don't have a clue whether I have any say in the decision. I bet they have some society woman with a pedigree dating back to the real Fafnir. Etienne knows all about me. I bet he has something special in mind for you. For all of you," he added, knowing how lame the evasion sounded.

"Griffen, I have known you for many years, since we were freshmen, and you know me," Mai said, not taking his hint at all. Her small face was as expressionless as a mask, which had always boded trouble for him. "The least you can do is say that you know I would be a wonderful queen."

"I . . ."

"What about me?" demanded Fox Lisa. "This is my city! If anyone, you ought to consider me."

"I'm going home," Val said, standing up suddenly. Her eyes were very bright. The glasses hanging from the frame above the bar began to crack one by one.

"Val, no . . . !" Griffen said, alarmed. "Come on, calm down. We'll talk about this."

"What's to talk about? If what's important is being a dragon, I can't believe you wouldn't ask me, your only sister ." The glass in front of him let out a snap! A thin crack appeared in its side. A thin drop of whisky and water seeped down the side and onto the bar.

"But it doesn't have anything to do with that," Griffen protested, mopping up the liquor with a paper napkin. "At least, I don't think so."

"But you didn't even say you'd nominate me if it was pertinent," Val said. Now a tear had started in each eye. Griffen knew that Val only cried when she was really angry.

"Or me!" Mai said.

"How do you think you figure into this?" Fox Lisa demanded, standing up to Mai. She was a couple of inches taller than the Asian woman, but her anger made her seem much bigger. One would think she would be frightened considering what she knew about Mai and the others, but as she had accepted Griffen's dragonhood with little more than a "hey, cool!" she had much the same reaction to Mai's trying to prove she was superior. Griffen admired her easy attitude and her courage. "You barge into this town, like you're some kind of big deal. Who the hell do you think you are?"

"Uh, guys? Do you think you could keep it down a little?"

The bartender leaned over the counter toward them. Griffen ducked his head apologetically.

"Sorry, Fred," Griffen said. "The discussion's just getting a little, uh, emphatic."

"Look, Griffen, I sympathize, but your ladies are scaring the customers," the bartender said, tilting his head in the direction of the door. The groups that had been seated at those tables were pushing out of the chairs and scrambling in their pockets for money. "I'm real sorry, but I think you ought to take it somewhere else for a while. No offense."