Roger Zelazny - Blood of Amber

Then she did a strange thing. She knelt, leaned and sniffed the track. When she recovered there was a slightly puzzled expression on her face. «What did you find?» I asked.

She shook her head, then stared off to the northeast. «I'm not sure,» she finally said, «but it went that way.»

I studied the ground further, rising and finally moving along the trail it had left. It did run off in that direction, though I lost it after several hundred feet when it departed the grove. Finally, I turned away.

«One of the dogs attacked the others, I guess,» I observed. «We'd better find that stick and head back if we want our breakfasts warm.» Inside, I learned that Luke's breakfast had been sent up to him. I was torn. I wanted to take mine upstairs, to join him and continue our conversation. If I did, though, Vinta would accompany me and the conversation would not be continued. Nor could I talk further with her under those circumstances. So I would have to join her down here, which meant leaving Luke alone for longer than I liked.

So I went along with her when she said, «We will eat in here,» and led me into a large hall. I guessed she had chosen it because my room with its open window was above the patio, and Luke could have heard us talking if we ate out there.

We sat at the end of a long darkwood table, where we were served.

When we were alone again, she asked, «What are you going to do now?»

«What do you mean?» I asked, sipping some grape juice.

She glanced upward. «With him,» she said. «Take him back to Amber?»

«It would seem the logical thing to do,» I replied.

«Good,» she said. «You should probably transport him soon. They have decent medical facilities at the palace.»

I nodded. «Yes, they do.»

We ate a few mouthfuls, then she asked, «That is what you intend doing, isn't it?»

«Why do you ask?»

«Because anything else would be absolutely foolish, and obviously he is not going to want to do it. Therefore, he will try to talk you into something else, something that will give him some measure of freedom while he recovers. You know what a line of shit he has. He'll make it sound like a great idea, whatever it is. You must remember that he is an enemy of Amber, and when he is ready to move again you will be in the way.» «It makes sense,» I said.

«I'm not finished.»

«Oh?»

She smiled and ate a few more bites, to keep me wondering. Finally,

«He came to you for a reason,» she continued. «He could have crawled off to any of a number of places to lick his wounds. But he came to you because he wants something. He's gambling, but it's a calculated thing. Don't go for it, Merle. You don't owe him anything.»

«I don't know why you think me incapable of taking care of myself,» I replied.

«I never said that,» she responded. «But some decisions are finely balanced things. A little extra weight this way or that sometimes makes the difference. You know Luke, but so do I. This is not a time to be giving him any breaks.»

«You have a point there,» I said.

«So you have decided to give him what he wants!»

I smiled and drank some coffee. «Hell, he hasn't been conscious long enough to give me the pitch,» I said. «I've thought of these things, and I want to know what he's got in mind too.»

«I never said you shouldn't find out as much as you can. I just wanted to remind you that talking with Luke can sometimes be like conversing with a dragon.»

«Yeah,» I acknowledged. «I know.»

«And the longer you wait the harder it's going to be,» she added.

I took a gulp of coffee; then, «Did you like him?» I asked.

«Like?» she said. «Yes,I did. And I still do. That is not material at this point, though.»

«I don't know about that,» I said.

«What do you mean?»

«You wouldn't harm him without good reason.»

«No, I wouldn't.»

«He is no threat to me at the moment.»

«He does not seem to be.»

«Supposing I were to leave him here in your care while I went off to Amber to walk the Pattern and to prepare them for the news?»

She shook her head vigorously. «No,» she stated. «I will not - I cannot - take that responsibility at this time.»

«Why not?»

She hesitated.

«And please don't say again that you cannot tell me» I went on. «Find a way to tell me as much as you can.»

She spoke slowly then, as if choosing her words very carefully. «Because it is more important for me to watch you than Luke. There is still danger for you which I do not understand, even though it no longer seems to be proceeding from him. Guarding you against this unknown peril is of higher priority than keeping an eye on him. Therefore, I cannot remain here. If you are returning to Amber, so am I»

«I appreciate your concern,» I said, «but I will not have you dogging my footsteps.»

«Neither of us has a choice.»

«Supposing I simply trump out of here to some distant shadow?»

«I will be obliged to follow you.»

«In this form, or another?»

She looked away. She poked at her food.

«You've already admitted that you can be other persons. You locate me in some arcane Fashion, then you take possession of someone in my vicinity.»

She took a drink of coffee.

«Perhaps something prevents you from saying it» I continued, «but that's the case. I know it.»

She nodded once, curtly, and resumed eating.

«Supposing I did trump out right now» I said, «and you followed after in your peculiar fashion.» I thought back to my telephone conversations with Meg Devlin and Mrs. Hansen. «Then the real Vinta Bayle would wake up in her own body with a gap in her memory, right?»

«Yes,» she answered softly.

«And that would leave Luke here in the company of a woman who would be happy to destroy him if she had any inkling who he really is.»

She smiled faintly. «Just so,» she said.

We ate in silence for a time. She had attempted to foreclose all my choices, to force me to trump back to Amber and take Luke with me. I do not like being manipulated or coerced. My reflexive attempt to do something other than what is desired of me then feels forced also.

I refilled our coffee cups when I had finished eating. I regarded a collection of dog portraits that hung on the wall across from me. I sipped and savored. I did not speak because I could think of nothing further to say.

Finally, she did. «So what are you going to do?» she asked me.

I finished my coffee and rose. «I am going to take Luke his stick,» I said.

I pushed my chair back into place and headed for the corner of the room where I had leaned the stick.

«And then?» she said. «What will you do?»

I glanced back at her as I hefted the staff. She sat very erect, her hands palms down on the table. The Nemesis look overlay her features once again, and I could almost feel electricity in the air.

«Whatever I must,» I replied, and I headed for the door.

I increased my pace as soon as I was out of sight. When I hit the stairs and saw that she was not following,I took the steps two at a time. On the way up, I withdrew my cards and located the proper one.

When I entered the room I saw that Luke was resting, his back against the bed's pillows. His breakfast tray was on the smaller chair, beside the bed. I dropped the latch on the door.

«What's the matter, man? We under attack or something?» Luke asked.

«Start getting up,» I said.

I picked up his weapon then and crossed to the bed. I gave him a hand sitting up, thrust the staff and the blade at him.

«My hand has been forced,» I said, «and I'm not about to turn you over to Random.»

«That's a comfort,» he observed.

«But we have to clear out - now.»