Herbie Brennan - Ruler of the Realm

‘I think Alan would have mentioned it if he’d planned to rescue them by transporter,’ Madame Cardui said. Then, echoing an earlier thought of Pyrgus, she added, ‘I can’t imagine Hairstreak could have stolen it already.’

‘You think Hairstreak is behind this?’ Pyrgus asked.

‘Not really,’ Madame Cardui said. ‘Why would he want to abduct them if he already had them in his power?’ Her eyes drifted towards Pyrgus. ‘I was just thinking aloud. How could Henry kill a vampire?’

‘Pardon?’ Pyrgus frowned.

‘They’re notoriously difficult to kill. Difficult and dangerous. I like Henry – he’s a sweet boy – but he’s hardly the action-hero type. Tell me exactly what happened.’

Pyrgus had already told her exactly what happened, but he told her again. There wasn’t much to tell. The speed Henry moved at was impossible (and where did he find a wooden stake when he needed one?) and the way Henry disappeared with Blue was impossible as well.

Madame Cardui stared at him thoughtfully for a long time, then suddenly snapped her head round.

‘Kitterick, were you recording?’

Kitterick was grooming her translucent cat, which was stretched in a louche manner on its cushions. He glanced round. ‘Of course, Madame.’

Madame Cardui stood up. ‘I think it’s time we replayed this whole incident.’

Pyrgus followed them into a windowless room off the main office. It was filled with projection equipment and, as they entered, a reality globe expanded in the middle of the floor.

‘I didn’t know about this place,’ Pyrgus said, looking around in awe.

‘Your sister agreed the funding the day she became Queen.’ Madame Cardui lowered the light level with a gesture. ‘Kitterick, your seat, please.’

‘Yes, Madame.’ Kitterick climbed on to a large chair attached to the main projection equipment. As he settled himself, straps emerged to bind his wrists and ankles, while two gleaming metallic tentacles inserted themselves into his ears. He closed his eyes.

‘Are you ready, Kitterick?’ Madame Cardui asked.

‘Yes, Madame.’

Madame Cardui leaned across him and extracted a small card from the tangle of cables that surrounded the machine. It was attached by three differently coloured wires, red, green and blue, to the body of the projector. She parted Kitterick’s hair, and plugged the card into the slot in his skull. Then she threw a switch on the back of his chair.

The reality globe began to glow.

Pyrgus watched, fascinated, as a pretty young Trinian in a spangled bathing suit materialised within the globe.

‘Concentrate, Kitterick!’ said Madame Cardui sharply.

‘Sorry, Madame.’

The pretty Trinian disappeared, to be replaced by a replica of Lord Hairstreak’s privacy chamber. They were all there: Blue close to Hairstreak, Flapwazzle… (Where had Flapwazzle disappeared to? Pyrgus suddenly thought. He’d accompanied them back to the palace.)… Henry, Kitterick and Pyrgus himself, just inside the closed door. And behind Pyrgus, the slim form of Pelidne, Hairstreak’s vampire. No one was moving.

‘Run sequence,’ Madame Cardui demanded.

The scene sprang to life, in three dimensions, full colour and stereo sound.

‘ Kitterick?’ Blue asked conversationally.

‘Never better, Ma’am,’ Kitterick – the Kitterick inside the reality globe – nodded benignly. ‘In the peak of my health, one might say.’ Pyrgus noticed that the real Kitterick, the one in the chair, mouthed the words silently.

Hairstreak said, ‘Now we have the niceties out of the way, Your Majesty, perhaps your people would care to tell us why they were trespassing on my land, and what -’

‘We have a confidential message for Her Majesty,’ Pyrgus watched himself say loudly. ‘ We were proceeding along -’

‘ Shut up, Pyrgus,’ Blue said. She half turned towards her uncle. ‘Lord Hairstreak, perhaps if we -’

And then it happened. Henry moved away from the door towards Blue and Hairstreak. He had a peculiar expression on his face, like somebody listening to distant music.

‘ It’s time we left, Blue,’ he said, and took her arm.

Pyrgus watched carefully. It was just possible Blue was in on this, but from her expression, he didn’t think so. She seemed surprised and reluctant, maybe even shocked. Pyrgus would have bet his Halek knife that if it had been anybody but Henry she’d have pulled her arm away. As it was, she began to move with him – reluctantly – towards the door.

‘ Pelidne!’ This was Hairstreak’s voice.

The scene must have been influenced by Kitterick’s concentration, because it narrowed in focus now so that Hairstreak, Kitterick himself and much of Pyrgus were cut from view. Pelidne grew in size, as did Blue and Henry.

‘Slow motion,’ Madame Cardui murmured.

There was an audible click from Kitterick’s head as it rested in the chair. Within the reality globe, Pelidne slowly withdrew his hand from the one shoulder of Pyrgus that was still visible and began to place himself between Blue and the door. Despite the fact that the scene was slowed, he moved with considerable speed. But nothing compared to Henry when he moved. Even with the scene creeping like a snail, Henry still blurred. Pyrgus watched his body twist as he pulled something from a pocket.

When it really happened, Pyrgus thought Henry had stabbed the vampire. Now he could see he’d actually thrown the stake. It entered Pelidne’s chest like a driven sword and stuck there, buried all but a protruding inch.

What happened next was even worse than the reality, since every slow detail was replayed. The scene juddered as Kitterick jerked back his head to avoid the spurting blood. Then Pelidne slowly collapsed into a corrupt powder. His clothes must have been new for they fell to the floor in pristine condition.

‘ What -?’ somebody said. Pyrgus thought the voice was probably Blue.

The focus of the scene narrowed again. From behind him, Pyrgus heard a sound like snoring as if Kitterick had fallen asleep. Blue and Henry were now the only two showing in the reality globe. Henry had hold of Blue’s arm and was dragging her towards the door. He looked utterly calm. It was impossible to believe he’d just killed a vampire.

Blue shouted, ‘No, Henry! Let me go!’ and tried to pull away.

Pyrgus leaned forward. This was the point where they’d disappeared.

But they didn’t disappear. Henry continued to drag Blue to the door, which he opened with his free hand. He looked back briefly into the room, then pulled her over the threshold and closed the door behind him.

Pyrgus stared in disbelief. ‘That wasn’t what happened,’ he told Madame Cardui.

‘Ah, there you are, Alan,’ Madame Cardui said, as Fogarty swept in. ‘Where were -?’ She stopped. ‘Why on earth are you dressed like that?’

Pyrgus glanced around, then blinked. Mr Fogarty was dressed in the full regalia of a Purple Emperor. Only the State Crown was missing. He scowled at them both.

‘Heard the news about Blue. Somebody had to run the shop.’ He sniffed. ‘Even if it involves dressing like a ponce.’

Pyrgus felt a sudden surge of suspicion. He’d have trusted Mr Fogarty with his life, but sometimes a lust for power did strange things to people. He said cautiously, ‘How did you hear about Blue, Mr Fogarty?’

Fogarty was staring at Kitterick, who was still strapped to the chair with the card plugged into his head. ‘What?’

‘How did you hear about Blue, Mr Fogarty?’ Pyrgus repeated. ‘Kitterick and I were the only ones who knew.’

Fogarty turned slowly to look at him. The barest hint of a smile curled his lips. ‘You weren’t the only ones who knew. I had it from the talking rug.’