Herbie Brennan - The Faeman Quest

Mella gave a brittle little laugh. ‘I wasn’t eaten, silly,’ she told him happily. ‘It was all a set-up to fool Lord Hairstreak.’ Her mother had warned her not to mention Lord Hairstreak’s name, but she couldn’t see how to tell the story without it; and besides, everybody knew about Lord Hairstreak’s involvement, even though he kept denying it. ‘Mella II and I changed clothes to make him think she was me and I was she and the Yidam – you know what a Yidam is, don’t you, Victorinus -?’

Victorinus reached out langorously to take a grape. ‘Big scary Old God,’ he said.

‘- the Yidam could make the manticores do anything and he had this special one called Aboventoun who had loads of fake blood and pretended to attack me and kill me and carry me off, only it wasn’t really me, it was Mella II and I was watching and screaming and dressed like Mella II so Hairstreak would take me back to the Palace thinking I was Mella II. You see, he thought Mella II would do everything he told her and take my place at the Palace, but instead he brought me right back to where I wanted to be so we could be sure my parents would believe it when I told them everything. Wasn’t that cool?’

‘I wish I could have watched you and your sister changing clothes,’ Victorinus told her softly.

Along the table a little way, Mella II was talking to Victorinus’s brother Pharnaces. Or rather listening, warmed by the steady gaze of liquid eyes. ‘So beautiful and yet so brave,’ he was saying. ‘Such a devastating combination.’

Mella II giggled nervously. ‘Oh, I wouldn’t say I was all that brave,’ she said coyly.

‘But, bella, you were, you were! ’ Pharnaces exclaimed. ‘Single-handedly you overthrew the dreadful regime of Haleklind and removed the greatest threat to our beloved Realm the world has ever known.’

Mella II was having trouble breathing, due to unfamiliar body sensations. Her heartbeat was raised, her skin was tingling, her mouth kept smiling of its own accord. It was like being dreadfully, wonderfully ill with a fever. For some reason, Pharnaces seemed to send her into a delirium of delight. She licked dry lips and admired the curl in his hair.

‘Hardly single-handed,’ she protested. ‘I was helped by more than a thousand manticores.’

‘Ah, beauty and the beasts!’ Pharnaces breathed in the husky way he had that sent shivers down her spine. ‘Thrill me again, bella, with the story of what happened!’

‘Oh, it was nothing really,’ Mella II sighed. ‘But I’ll tell you anyway,’ she added quickly. ‘When Aboventoun carried me off, he brought me back to the herd and the Yidam – you know what a Yidam is, don’t you, Pharnaces -?’

Pharnaces reached out to take a grape. ‘Big scary Old God,’ he said.

‘- the Yidam could make the manticores do absolutely anything and he suggested that if I took the whole herd with me to Kremlin Karcist, it might help me persuade the Table of Seven not to use them as a weapon, but when the Companions saw them – you know what a Companion is, don’t you, Pharnaces -?’

Pharnaces placed the grape between his perfect white teeth and bit into it very slowly. He did not take his eyes off hers, not for a single, shivery instant. ‘Big scary old Haleklinder,’ he said softly.

Mella II swallowed. ‘- When the Companions saw them, they ran away because manticores are really sweet, but they’re really, really scary at the same time, especially when there’s a whole lot of them, and then Uncle Pyrgus arrived, and of course I’d never met him before so I didn’t know who he was, but he had this Haleklind friend called Corin with him who wanted to overthrow the rotten old Table of Seven and free the manticores and make Haleklind much nicer and he took over the Government and called off the whole war. Corin did.’ She’d spilled it out all of a rush, which wasn’t remotely cool, but Pharnaces was still looking at her adoringly, so that was all right.

Queen Blue was climbing to her feet. Conversations round the tables ceased immediately as heads turned in her direction. ‘My friends…’ Blue said. She was speaking quietly, but had the knack of projecting her voice so that it carried clearly throughout the banquet hall. ‘… We are gathered here this evening to celebrate the arrival of a new addition to the Royal Family…’ There was a sudden burst of excited applause and a few strident whistles. Blue waited for the din to die down, then went on. ‘… A new addition to the Royal Family who has arrived from a most -’ She hesitated, pretending to search for the appropriate word, ‘- unexpected source.’

‘And nothing to do with King Henry!’ shouted a racous young earl who’d clearly had too much to drink.

Blue smiled as she waited for the laughter to die down. ‘A gift from my uncle – who unfortunately cannot be with us tonight – my uncle and former leader of the Faeries of the Night, now thankfully fully recovered from his tragic… accident, my uncle Lord Hairstreak…’ She waited for applause and it came, although notably subdued from those Faeries of the Light who were present. ‘My uncle Lord Hairstreak who has generously presented us with a perfect, fully grown, cloned sister for our beloved daughter Mella.’ She gestured, turning smiling towards Mella II. ‘My Lords, Ladies and Gentlemen, I would ask you to please be upstanding and raise your glasses in a toast to… Mella II! ’

As Blue sat down again, Henry murmured, ‘You overdid the uncle bit.’

Blue was still smiling and acknowledging the congratulations of their guests. Out of the corner of her mouth she said, ‘I wanted to emphasise family unity. The last thing we need now is another Lighter-Nighter split.’

‘I think we should have jailed the old tort-feasor,’ Henry growled. ‘Locked him up and thrown away the key.’

Blue turned towards him. ‘Where’s the proof? We have no documentary evidence of his involvement with Haleklind, no evidence at all except hearsay. We may claim he wanted to replace our daughter with a clone. He says he was merely grooming Mella II as a gift. It would be political madness to move against him without a cast-iron case. Remember he used to be the leader of the Faeries of the Night and could well be again, now he’s got a new body. There’s nothing we can do except play along.’ She reached for her goblet and took a small sip. ‘There’s one positive thing about what’s happened: Hairstreak’s now out in the open, where we can keep an eye on him.’

‘Two,’ Henry said.

Blue frowned, puzzled. ‘Two?’

‘Two positive things…’ He glanced down the table.

Blue followed the direction of his gaze.

‘We now have twins,’ said Henry, grinning.

‘Do you think she’ll go back?’ Henry asked, gnawing away at something that had been troubling him.

‘Mella?’ Blue asked.

‘Yes.’

‘To the Analogue World?’

‘Yes.’

‘To see your mother?’

‘Yes.’

‘I expect she will,’ Blue said mildly. They’d had this conversation before and Blue was sick of it. She cast around for something that would shut Henry up. ‘Maybe you should take her.’

‘What?!’ Henry exploded.

‘Better than having her run away.’ Blue dropped her head as if studying some State papers so he couldn’t see the smile.

It had the desired effect. Henry stopped obsessing. Or at least stopped obsessing aloud.

After a while, Blue said, ‘That’s nice. I think.’

‘What’s nice?’ Henry asked her.

They were together in the His ’n’ Hers study on the top floor of the Purple Palace. Sunlight streamed through the high windows, giving what was essentially an office space a bright, cheerful, holiday look.