Dave Duncan - When the Saints

He seemed to find Madlenka better company than the muttering priests, so she sat by his bed, held his huge, rough hand-twice the size of hers-and spoke of the golden days of long ago. She helped him sip water and she wiped away his sweat. Now and again he would speak. Sometimes the one remaining doctor or priest would come by to check on him or ask her permission to do something or other. The rest of the time she just talked, and at times she managed to make him smile. News of the Wends’ destruction by a thunderbolt from God arrived, and she was passing on the wonderful news to Radomir when she realized that his eyes were no longer moving. She called the doctor over to confirm that he was dead. Then there was nothing to do except wait for the rest of the patients to die, so she left the priest in charge and went to her room to mourn.

After a while she rang for a light supper and water to wash her face. She knew she must try to get some sleep before Anton came, because she might not get much after. She asked for Giedre, but she had gone out celebrating.

Madlenka had just finished eating when Wulf appeared-not close, over by the bed. She gasped and glanced at the door. There was a bolt on it, but what possible reason could she have to lock her husband out of their bedroom? Then she took another look at Wulf.

“What’s wrong? You’re hurt?”

He forced a smile and held it. “Just tired. No sleep last night and not much for two nights before that. I’m about to fall over and disappear until morning, but I want to ask a favor…” He leaned against the bedpost as if he needed the support. “A big favor.”

Her eyes kept sliding back to the door. “Wh="0on#x2ere’s Anton?”

“In the solar, with Otto. That’s really what I came to tell you. Anton’s going to ask the bishop to annul your handfasting.”

She leaped off the stool and went to him, gripped his arms. “You’re serious?”

“I’m ecstatic, but how do you feel?”

“Ecstaticker! Oh, Wulf, darling! This isn’t his idea of a joke?”

“No.” The smile had faded. Golden eyes solemn… “You won’t be countess.”

“I don’t want to be countess. I want to be your wife.” She decided he wasn’t going to kiss her, so she tried to kiss him.

He turned his face away from hers but he did join in the hug, strong arms tight around her. “Wait, please! We can’t. I’m doomed. It was me destroyed the Wends’ army. I set fire to their powder wagons.”

“I wondered if that was your doing. Oh, I’m so happy!”

“I killed thousands of men, maybe even the duke himself.”

She thought of Radomir’s agony. “I wish you’d killed every last one of the rats.”

“I may have come close.”

“I don’t care. I love you. The war was their fault. You did right.”

“But the Church will not say that, even if the men were schismatics. I killed a priest. The Inquisition may take its time to plan its campaign, but it can always find me. There is nowhere I can run.”

“You don’t believe that! There must be a way out!”

“Well, maybe. But it’s a very thin chance…”

Sudden brightness, and they were not in her room anymore. They were in… nowhere. Not truly bright, but not dark; all silent and empty, a sort of shining fog. Nothing in sight anywhere. She cried out in fear.

“It’s all right.” His embrace tightened even more. “You’re perfectly safe. This is limbo. It’s very hard to spy on us here, that’s all. There’s a legion of people after me, not just the Church. King Konrad is dying, so Cardinal Zdenek wants me, and I think he’s up to no good. Even the Orthodox Church may send Speakers to hunt me down for killing Vilhelmas. Our life together may be very, very brief. There is one, very faint hope.”

“Tell me!”

“There’s a group of Speakers calling themselves the Saints. They say they’re honorable. They say they can protect me from the Church, in return for my loyalty. They even promise a priest who will absolve me of my sins, although I don’t know if the pope himself could do that now. Speakers are only human, and the Saints believe that we cannot be trusted not to abuse our talent. I have a wickedly quick temper, as I’m sure Anton has told you.”

She chuckled. “Several times! You laid him flat with one punch, I heard.”

“Two punches. He deserved both of them, but that was fists, not talent.”

“What do you mean by ‘talent’?”

He hesitated so long, just looking at her, that she thought he wasn’t going to answer at all. Then he whispered, “The ability to speak to the devil and get him to perform evil miracles.”

“Wulf! No! You’re not that, not a Satanist!”

“I don’t know,” he said miserably. “I still don’t know! I truly think I must be damned, darling. I try to do good but everything I do turns out evil. Trying to rescue my brother, I killed a friar. Helping Marek kill Vilhelmas was wrong! I know now that he didn’t kill your father and brother, although he knew who did and didn’t stop him. He did lead the raid that killed fourteen men at Long Valley, and yet I still feel as bad about Vilhelmas as I do about destroying the Wend army. I didn’t intend to wipe out the army, just its supply of powder, but that blew thousands of men to mush.”

“Vilhelmas was a traitor and a killer and you saved Jorgary from an unprovoked war. How can you call those results evil?”

He pulled her head against his, so that they were cheek-to-cheek. “Well, I may do even more terrible things if I’m not controlled. People who know about Speaking insist that a Speaker must be bound to a person who isn’t a Speaker. The master is called the cadger and the Speaker the falcon. They’re just code words. The cadger can limit what the falcon can do. Not give orders, just permission. It’s a partnership. The Saints want me to swear to their leader, Lady Umbral, but I haven’t met her. There’s only one person in the world I trust enough, and that’s you.”

“Gladly! If an oath’s all it takes, I’ll swear to be a dormouse.”

“But it would mean that you may share in my guilt.”

This gnawing doubt wasn’t like him, she knew, but he was visibly exhausted, at the end of his tether. He should be comforted and put to bed to sleep around the clock.

She said, “I’ll happily share in your entire life, as long as I as long have your love. I just want you to live. And my second wish is to live with you.”

She felt him draw a deep breath. “I won’t swear to the Umbral woman. I don’t know her or what her motives are. I could trust Otto, but I’d be tied to him all my life, always the baby brother. I want to swear to you.”

“I swear to love you forever. What else do I have to do?”

“Just accept my oath. Now, don’t let go of me!” He removed his hug and took hold of her hands instead; then he knelt down on… on nothing at all, but she was standing on nothing at all and looking down made her feel dizzy. “Madlenka, I swear by my immortal soul that I will never use my unnatural powers except to do things that you have given me permission to do, and I will never hurt you or threaten you in any way, and I will always defend you and keep you from harm, and I swear to God that I will keep this oath all the days of my life. That’s it, and all you have to do is accept my oath, which shall bind us unless and until I agree to let you transfer it to another cadger.”

“I so swear, and may God help me keep this oath all the days of my life.”

He stood up, still holding her hands. “Do I have your leave to return us to your chamber, cadger?”

“Yes, after one more kiss and… Mmmph!”

He was very good at kissing already. But then they were back in her room, in dim, wobbling candlelight.