Anne Bishop - Bridge of Dreams

“But not the same,” she said quietly.

“Ever changing, like the world.”

“Why your change of heart?”

“Lots of reasons,” he replied. “The biggest being that I don’t trust Medusah right now. She doesn’t know you, and while her magic might be able to merge your aspects, it doesn’t mean you’ll be whole.” He hesitated. “And she’s not happy with you at the moment, so I don’t want her messing around in your head or your heart.”

“Why is she annoyed with me?”

“Because I helped Zhahar ask for Heart’s Justice instead of accepting the Tryad’s punishment for loving a man of single aspect.”

“Lee!”

He stared at her. He thought about fetching one of the lanterns, but if the light was bright enough for him to see her face, he’d end up wearing the damn glasses to cut the light and wouldn’t be able to see her anyway. At least they were both in the dark this way.

“If Zhahar and I had become lovers, the only way Tryad law would allow her to remain with me is if her sisters were merged into her. One body. One face. Two people trapped inside and unable to experience the world except vicariously through her—if any part of them survived at all. They say it’s a merging, but the end result is the death of two of the sisters, with the remaining sister looking at that one surviving face for the rest of her life. What kind of life could she have? What kind of relationship could she build?”

“But asking for Heart’s Justice,” Glorianna protested.

“Zhahar doesn’t deserve that punishment. Neither do Zeela and Sholeh. And I don’t think this has much to do with Zhahar or me, but it does seem like someone wants to use us as an excuse to strike at the a Zephyra Tryad’s authority. ‘Prove you’re our leader. Kill your daughters.’”

Glorianna said nothing, just stood looking out over the land beyond the island. Finally, she asked softly, “What do you want for Sholeh Zeela a Zhahar, Lee? What are you hoping Heart’s Justice will do?”

“I’m hoping it will give them a chance to have a life in a place where they can be accepted as Tryad and still explore choices that their people aren’t ready or willing to accept. They were changed by their exposure to the city of Vision and by working at the Asylum. By meeting Danyal and me. I want Zhahar and her sisters to find the place they were meant to be.”

“Even if it’s not with you?”

The question made his heart ache. “Yes. Even if it’s not with me.”

Glorianna sighed. “All right. That’s a problem for another day. It’s time for me to find Danyal.”

“I’ll fetch the lantern.”

As he made his way to the shed to fetch the lantern, he wondered what Glorianna expected to find that she didn’t want him to see.

The living fruit struggled a while longer. Danyal watched them, feeling nothing but a heavy satisfaction. Some part of him knew that feeling meant he was in danger, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

Then something shimmered through the currents of Light—and something far darker than the darkness he’d found in his own heart slid through the Dark currents as she suddenly appeared.

She looked at the thorn trees and their fruit, then looked at him—and smiled.

“It’s easy to become a monster, isn’t it?” Belladonna said. “So easy to become the terrible and sublime when you can give shape to every dark dream the human heart has ever known. Fear can be a seductive kind of worship, and when you can do anything , it’s hard to demand that the monster go back to the can’t-do-it rules everyone else lives by.”

Danyal turned his back on the thorn trees to look at her. “You did it. You turned away.”

“I do it,” she corrected. “I could find that landscape again, that place Belladonna ruled.” She lifted her chin to indicate the thorn trees. “Just as you found a piece of it tonight. The memories of people I loved, people I had cast out of my heart in order to survive in that landscape, gave me a way to return to the Light. But I remember what it felt like to be everything, do anything. I remember, and every day I choose not to do the things I did in that place. Every day I choose not to let the monster walk in the landscapes that are in my keeping. Every day I choose to hold on to both Glorianna and Belladonna, to stay among the people I love and who love me. I choose, Danyal. Every single day. And now that you’ve had a taste of what you can do with your connection to the world and what you might become if you allow yourself, you will also have to choose—every single day.”

“Have I forfeited the Light?” he asked, looking back at the thorn trees.

“Some pieces of it,” Glorianna replied. “Not all of it. You didn’t cast it out; just smothered it for a little while. I don’t think you’ll be able to find the Place of Light in the Shamans’ compound, but you can still walk in Sanctuary.”

His heart hurt from the relief her words gave him.

“I need a teacher,” he said softly. “I need a Guide to help me learn what I’m becoming.”

“I know,” she replied just as softly. “Let your heart travel lightly, Danyal. Right here, right now, let your heart travel lightly.”

He closed his eyes and used his training to empty his mind and heart of all the fury, all the dark thoughts.

Who was he now? A voice for the world. A Shaman. But those things didn’t mean the same thing as they had a few months ago. Who was he now—and what could he become that would help the people whose lives he touched?

“Well,” Glorianna said with a soft laugh, “not so far from the Light after all.”

Danyal opened his eyes and looked around. The Asylum’s dead were still all around them, but the thorn trees and their terrible fruit were gone. So were the brothel, the house held by the wizards, and the privy.

And something now glowed where the temple had been.

“Wind chimes,” he whispered, moving toward the glow. “I hear wind chimes.” Joy.

As he and Glorianna approached the small building, the chimes rang louder, almost changing to something harsh.

“Nik?” he called. “Benham? Are you in there?”

The door cracked open. “Danyal?” Benham said. “Is that you?”

He laughed, his heart soaring with relief. “Yes, it’s me.”

He passed through the glow as Benham pulled open the door. But the Meddik looked past him and stiffened.

“Fog hides,” Glorianna said softly, stepping up beside Danyal. “The people in here don’t need to see what is out there.”

He looked at Benham and nodded. Benham stepped back from the door. Danyal started to move aside to let Glorianna enter first, but she put a hand on his back and pushed him forward as she said, “They’re your people.”

Eight inmates, plus Benham and Nik, whose left arm was in a sling. The inmates bobbed their heads at him but stayed on the other side of the room as he, Glorianna, Benham, and Nik formed a tight circle.

“We were just leaving the temple when Nik rushed up to warn us,” Benham said, keeping his voice low. “Nik was sliced in the arm while defending the door until I got everyone back inside. It was the strangest thing. The door shouldn’t have held, but a couple inmates grabbed up wind chimes and began ringing them, and it was like this building went away from the fighting.”

A queer shiver rushed down Danyal’s spine.

“You saw the glow when you came up?” Benham asked. “That’s all we saw. Then it began to fade and someone tried to break down the door, so we all grabbed wind chimes and rang them.”

“Joy,” Glorianna said. “Dark hearts couldn’t see a place filled with the Light released through joy.”

“Odd things happened,” Benham said. “The glow gave us a little ground all around the building. Enough to make a toilet outside. And the other day, when we were feeling desperate for water, pails of fresh water appeared outside the door.”