Joshua Simon - Forgotten Soldiers

“You’re crying?”

She punched my arm with her free hand. It was a weak effort, but the meaning was not lost on me. “Of course, I’m crying. I’m not a piece of granite.”

“Sorry, I’m just surprised.”

“I’m sorry, Tyrus. For everything.”

“Forget about me. Think about Lasha.” I nodded toward the door. “And the kids.”

She wiped her face. “I guess they had been fighting their own war while we were fighting ours. That explains why your daughter could probably freeze water with that look.”

I bobbed my head in agreement.

“How are you dealing with all this?” she asked.

“Not well. But I don’t really have a choice. I’ve got two kids to look after.”

“So you been keeping it in then?”

“Well, I’m not about to talk to Zadok or Myra about what I’m feeling.”

“What about Dekar? Or even Ira? Have you told them everything?”

“A few things in passing, but not all the details. I’m sure they’ve been able to put the pieces together, especially if others in town have talked to them. They’ve been good enough to keep it to themselves.”

“Big brother, when will you learn? You can’t keep this stuff to yourself.”

“Look who’s talking.”

“True, but I’d talk to you about something like this if the roles were reversed. Gods, I can tell you’re feeling better already. I know that’s not just from me coming around.”

“I was worried about you.”

“Still.”

I sighed. “I’m not disagreeing with what you’re trying to say, but it’s not as easy as you think.” I thought of my dream with Jareb and Lasha. “Frankly, I don’t want to talk about the stuff going through my head, because its images of things no man should have of his wife, you know? I don’t want to share that with anyone because I want to forget it myself. Her enjoying. .” I coughed, then started to laugh bitterly. “I keep thinking about our conversation over that last recruit you hurt when he hit that whore. You asked ‘What if that was Lasha?’ To think after all this time you had a talent for prophecy too.”

She put her free hand over mine and I realized I had started to shake. “I never in a thousand years thought there’d be any truth to what I said. Otherwise, I never would have made the comment.”

“I know.”

“Big brother, promise me something.”

“What?”

“Not to forget that regardless of how genuine those images seem, they aren’t real. Lasha worshipped the ground you walked on in a way I never understood. Still don’t. She loved you. Just like she loved those kids. I’m sure anything she did she treated like a job. Like you and I would have looked at digging ditches. I’m willing to bet it lacked all enjoyment and love. No way she would have given that part of herself to anyone but you.”

“I know,” I whispered. “It’s just going to take time.”

“Then let’s drop it. Pull yourself together so we can call in Ira and Dekar. They should be back by now. It will do them some good to hear what I have to say and I’d rather not repeat myself.”

“Are you up for more talking?”

“I’m feeling better after that food. Besides, after what you told me, the end of the world doesn’t seem half as bad as what’s happened already.”

* * *

Before I grabbed Ira and Dekar, I helped Ava put on an old shirt we’d borrowed from Dinah so she could sit up without someone helping her hold a sheet over her chest. She wasn’t keen on putting her leathers back on just yet. Dekar came in shortly afterward carrying more food-a bit of ham, cheese, fresh bread, a couple of apples, and honey. He took the lone chair in the room and began laying the goods out. Ava went right for the honey, attacking it with a spoon while Ira brought in another chair from the sitting room.

Everyone got comfortable and waited. Ira, as usual, lacked any patience. “Well? What’s going on?” he asked Ava.

She glared. “I’m thinking about where best to begin.”

Having recovered from our earlier talk, I couldn’t miss the chance to poke at her. I gestured to the dresser. “How about that white robe? If I recall, you swore you’d never wear one.”

Ira seized on the opening. “Yeah, how long did it take for you to cave in?”

“I didn’t cave in, you idiot. It’s a disguise. I had never opened a transfer portal before and knew I needed to get to Tyrus. I figured he had made it back here, but without any experience, I knew I’d be taking a risk trying a portal that would cover that distance. So, I needed access to the Sky Tower. It’s this place in Hol where the High Mages perform their most complicated sorcery. The wards etched in the stone there make it easier to cast a spell. Only a High Mage can get past the guards, which I’m not. Therefore, I needed the robes so people wouldn’t ask questions.”

“The Sky Tower? That’s a pretty dumb name,” said Ira.

“Almost as dumb as Ira, huh?” Ava shot back.

Ira opened his mouth and closed it like he had been ready to agree.

Dekar snorted.

“How does that fit into all this end of the world stuff?” I asked.

“Not much other than providing me a way to get here. But you asked the question.”

“Fair enough. Start when you’re ready.”

She took another swallow of honey, set the spoon down, and cleared her throat.

“News of Damanhur hit Hol hard. Everyone agreed something had to be done about the rogue soldiers who started that mess as Damanhur had reported things to the king,” Ava began. “No one in the army believed the city’s report though. We all knew this wasn’t a bunch of green recruits, but veterans. You wouldn’t have started killing unless someone had been trying to kill you first. The king knew this too at first, but popular opinion began to sway him. The High Mages took the side of the king. Probably for no other reason than to get under General Balak’s skin, who, by the way, was livid. He and the king got into quite the shouting match. Balak didn’t back down until the king threatened to remove him as commander of the army.”

“I never thought Balak would do that,” I said.

Ira grunted in what sounded like disgust. I remembered his story about why he hated the man and wondered if Balak could ever do enough to redeem himself in Ira’s eyes. Probably not. Honestly, after hearing Ira’s story, I doubted Balak could ever do anything to redeem himself in my eyes either.

“Despite the outcry,” continued Ava, “the king ordered Balak to release the next wave of soldiers. Balak did and word is he told them to pass through Damanhur. He was daring the people to try something again.”

“Why?” I asked.

She shrugged. “Probably out of spite. Balak was angry and I guess he figured that since that group was triple the size of the group you left with they’d be safer. He was wrong. Damanhur attacked the second group at the city’s gates. The city took heavy casualties, more than twice of what they gave, but in the end they had the numbers and wiped that second group out completely.”

Ira, Dekar, and I all exchanged curses. More of our brothers had died while just trying to get home.

“Makes me want to go back and kill every last one of the people in that city while they sleep,” said Ira.

“Too late,” said Ava.

I raised an eyebrow.

“Balak lost it. The same night he got word of what happened, he pulled the entire army out of Genesha and marched on Damanhur while refusing all communication with the king and the Council of High Mages.”

“By the gods, he marched on a Turine city?” I asked.

She nodded. “He razed the blasted thing to the ground. Every last man, woman, and child killed. Word is he wouldn’t even allow it to be looted. Said he didn’t want the taint of those spoils in his army.”