Joshua Simon - Forgotten Soldiers

“I tried to but-”

“Do you have enough healthy animals to pull a wagon?” I asked.

Nason started. “Maybe a couple.”

“Get them harnessed. We’ve been so busy worrying about those here in town, we’ve forgotten about the farms.”

He swore. “You’re right. I’ll try to organize some people to pick up those really bad off and have them brought in.”

I thought of the old woman I lost. “No time for that. They could be too far gone to heal by then. Just take me to them.”

“You’re in no shape to travel,” said Nason.

“I can sleep in the wagon.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re swaying on your feet now. You need more than a few minutes of rest in the back of a bumpy wagon.”

“Molak be damned, Nason! You talked me into helping these people. Don’t try to talk me out of it now.”

Something happened then. I’m not sure what. One moment, I was all set to get into a shouting match with Nason, the next my eyes opened to Ira slapping my face. I was on the ground.

“All right, stop. I’m awake.”

Ira hit me again, this time harder.

“By the gods, I said I was awake!”

“I know,” said Ira. “That was for being so hard headed. I’ll drag you upstairs if I have to, Ty, but you’re not going anywhere until you get some rest. I’m not about to have you pass out again.”

“But by then it could be too late. .”

“I’ll go.”

All heads turned back toward the inn. Zadok stood on the edge of the porch looking at us.

“I thought I told you to stay upstairs,” said Ira.

“You were taking too long. I was worried about Pa. And Aunt Ava is doing all right without me.” He left the porch and walked toward us. “I heard what you said, Pa. Let me help those people on the farms. I know my resistance isn’t as strong as yours, but it’s better than nothing.”

I shook my head. The thought of Zadok going off without me made me sick to my stomach. If he went off into the country, I’d have no way of knowing how he was doing until it was too late. “No.”

“Why not?”

“It’s too dangerous.”

“Too dangerous? What’s dangerous about riding in a wagon and putting my hand on people who need my help?”

“A lot can happen.”

“A lot can happen here too. I could trip and fall. The inn could burn down. There could even be an explosion,” he said, gesturing toward the ugly sky that hovered in the direction of Hol.

My son, the jester.

“That’s different.”

“Why?”

“Because if something does happen while you’re at the farms, I’ll be too far away to help you.”

“I’ll go with him, Ty.” Ira’s face had taken on a look of stone. “I promise not a hair on his head will be harmed as long as I’m breathing.”

Ira didn’t make declarations like that often and when he did, he took them seriously. Still. .

“Please, Pa.”

I sighed, realizing he was right. “You can go, but so help me you better not do like I did. You need to take breaks to eat and drink.”

Zadok gave me a brilliant smile. “I will.”

“Don’t worry, Ty,” Ira said. “I’ll be as much of a nag to him as you can be to us.”

I shook my head. “All right, Nason. Go get a wagon. I’m going to see everyone off before I go upstairs.”

Lasha stood at the foot of the bed and slowly undressed, exposing the fullness of her dark, smooth skin. She wore a smile she saved only for me when the kids had gone down for the night and the house was quiet.

My heart raced and blood flowed to places I had no control over.

Her smile grew wider as she began to glide around the bed, stretching and pretending that she had no clue what she was doing. She looked down and noticed my excitement. “Oh, were you expecting something?” she asked, teasing me as she liked to do.

I loved every minute of it.

I started to speak, ready to fire back some bit of witty banter for her to play off of, but found I could not open my mouth. I attempted to bring a hand to my face, but my arm did not move and neither did the other. I was strapped to the posts of the bed. Looking down, my legs were bound similarly.

I pulled, jerked, fought to break free of the constraints without any success. Lasha stood as naked as her name day at the foot of the bed, smile growing wider by the moment.

The door to our bedroom swung open. Jareb entered. He said not a word. In fact, he didn’t even acknowledge me. Why would he? I saw the lust in his eyes. I knew what he wanted. He pulled Lasha to him, kissing and touching her in ways that only I had ever done. Bile crept into my throat and tears filled my eyes. The entire bed shook, creaking as I pulled as hard as I could against my binds. I felt the straps dig into my skin, cutting my wrists and ankles. Still, I pulled. I could not let him do that to my wife.

My Lasha.

She turned to me. Her eyes met mine and she whispered. “You weren’t here for me.”

My head slammed back against the pillow as the fight left me. I closed my eyes. Regaining control of my mouth again, I screamed.

* * *

“Tyrus! Xank be cursed, wake up!”

My eyes shot open and I sat up covered in sweat, chest heaving. I swallowed and winced at the grating rawness in my throat.

“What happened?” asked Dekar, hands still gripping my shoulders as if he let go I might slip back into the hell he shook me out of.

My eyes darted about, blinking. I saw the chairs, the dresser, the big window. I was back at the Hemlock Inn.

“A dream,” I said.

“About the war?”

I shook my head.

He noticeably relaxed.

In the army, some soldiers began to lose their minds as the things they had seen in the war began to haunt them. It started out while they slept, but over time, they began to dream of the horrors even in their waking moments. It couldn’t be predicted who would be affected. A grisly old veteran was just as susceptible as the young recruit. And the worst part was that none of the healers knew how to treat the ailment. Several of the men affected ended up taking their own lives rather than experience those memories over and over.

I was sure Ira had told Dekar about having to wake me from reliving the battle at Safed Plain.

“What was it then?”

“Just a nightmare,” I said.

“Do you want to talk about it?” asked Dekar.

“No.”

I didn’t want to even think about it. I sure didn’t want to discuss those images. To me, nothing in the war was as bad as what had entered my mind-especially because there was some truth to the dream. Granted, Lasha likely never enjoyed what she had done with Jareb, but he’d had her. And worst of all, I wasn’t there to prevent it.

One more thing that would haunt me forever.

My stomach lurched and my heart raced again, this time in anger. “Let’s just talk about something else.”

I went to rub my eyes and realized one of my hands was bound. I was in bed beside Ava, my forearm strapped to hers. I guessed that might explain part of my dream.

“What in the name of Molak happened? Last thing I remember I was outside as Nason went off to get a wagon to take Zadok out to the farms.”

Dekar reached over and snatched a skin of water off a nearby chair. “Here. Drink.”

I took the skin and inhaled the liquid, nearly choking.

“Slowly.”

I wiped my mouth. “So, last night?”

“Well, you ended up passing out in the street again and Ira had to carry you upstairs. Zadok came up too and they filled us in on what had happened. It was probably a good thing you were out because Myra was pretty livid at you for saying Zadok could go off by himself. Ira said he’d be there with him. Myra made some choice comment about that and within a matter of seconds all three were at each other’s throats.”