Gareth Williams - A Dark, Distorted Mirror. Volume 5 - Among the Stars, like Giants. Part 1 - Learning How to Live

Kulomani stared out into the rising daylight for a while, and then said softly. "You are Marrago, are you not? The former Lord-General of the Centauri?"

"I am."

"I understand your Government has placed a price on your head."

"They have. Are you going to try to claim it?"

"No. I am a soldier, not a bounty hunter, and one old soldier can respect the decisions of another, even if we are on different sides."

"Yes, we are on different sides, but which of us is on the right one? Are you happy with the way things are?"

"Happy? I do not think I know. The war is over. That is good."

"And how long until another one begins?"

"That is not something I want to think about."

"It's coming, though. You can't deny that."

"No. I have felt something stirring, an undercurrent of.... pain and fear and anger. Soon it will all break free on the surface, and then....

"And then...."

He paused. "I think you had better tell me everything."

Sheridan immediately took a step back, the trance that had gripped him as he had walked the dead corridors at an end. His PPG seemed to fly into his hand and he pointed it directly at Sinoval.

But the Minbari was faster still. Stormbringer flowed in his hands like water, like an extension of his self. One thrust and the gun was knocked from Sheridan's hands.

"I did not come here to fight," Sinoval said simply.

"You could have fooled me," Sheridan replied. "You look like you were expecting one."

"A wise man prepares for every eventuality, is that not so? I did not think you would welcome me kindly, Sheridan."

"You thought right. The Alliance wants you brought in for a war crimes tribunal."

"Oh? And what war crimes have I committed exactly? I made no bargains with the Shadows. At best, you could say I treated with one who was working with them, but that was outwith my knowledge, and she is long dead."

"You are plotting sedition and rebellion against the Alliance."

"How can it be rebellion? I was never sworn to the Alliance, and I never will be. The Federation joined only after I departed, remember. If you mean I am assembling forces to bring you down, then yes, I admit it. But if I am going that far, then I expect the same honesty from you, Sheridan.

"Who rules the Alliance?"

"We all do."

"And still you delude yourself. I saw the truth in you in that Council Chamber over two years ago, and I still see it now. They rule you. They rule all of you, and you just do not see it at all. Who wants me arrested, Sheridan? Who orders the Inquisitors? Ironic, isn't it? They hide in the shadows and make you all dance to their tune."

"The Vorlons aren't our enemies."

"The Vorlons are destroying you all, and you are too blind to see it! Look, Sheridan! Open your eyes and look around and think for one moment! Is this why the Alliance was created? Did any of you have the Inquisitors in mind then? Look at what is happening to the Centauri. Is that what you had in mind? Look at what happened to the Drazi.

"Did you envisage any of this at the beginning? Secret police. Martial law. Civil war, even.

"Can you truly tell me you wanted these things at the beginning?"

"It's not that simple, and you know it. We have to make sure the Shadows don't come back. We have to make sure this peace is eternal, not just for a few years, or even for a thousand."

"And your methods.... these will bring war in months. All you have done is build a paper house around foolish dreams. You remember the war, as you should, but you think anything is preferable to that. What matter if we have lost our freedom? What matter if we weaken and shatter and destroy one of our oldest allies? What matter if we are angry and hungry and lost?

"What matter any of those things? After all, we have our peace, don't we? Our precious peace!

"Tell me this, Sheridan.

"Just what kind of peace have you bought us?"

"Listen to me, you worthless hypocrite, before you start coming over all noble and concerned! A champion of the poor and downtrodden?

"How dare you? I've been at war for eighteen years solid! Eighteen years! It's cost me my friends, my wife, my parents, my sister, my daughter, my son.... It's cost all those things and more, to God alone knows how many people!

"Fine, what we have isn't perfect. Nothing ever is this side of the grave, but it's better than the alternative!

"And I think we should look at your motives here just a little. You're a warrior, remember. You're bred to kill. That's all you know. What does it matter whom you kill, hmm? As long as you have someone to fight, then good on you and get on with it, and to hell with anyone who gets in the way.

"War does no good for anyone. Talk to the people of Kazomi Seven and Proxima Three who can now look up at the skies without fear. Talk to the parents who can watch their children grow up without fear. Talk to the children who can look at a future where they don't have to be afraid."

Sinoval smiled. "Ah, Sheridan. What makes you think I haven't? And as for you, talk to the Drazi. Talk to the Centauri. Talk to those who have lost sons and daughters and wives and husbands to your Inquisitors. No fear? They are more afraid now than they ever were before."

"Don't lie to me. The Inquisitors look for Shadow agents. The innocent have nothing to fear from them."

"And who defines who is innocent, Sheridan? The Inquisitors themselves, of course. Whom do they serve? To whom do they answer?"

"The Council, of course."

"You are a blind man, Sheridan. Whom does the Alliance serve? All of your noble ideals of peace and justice and an end to war. Yes, I was a warrior, and yes, I was bred to kill. But all that means is that I look at peace with a suspicious eye. And this peace in particular is shaking at the foundations.

"Look at them, Sheridan. Just open your eyes and look. Ask yourself this question, and see if you like the answer.

"Whom do you serve?"

"I serve peace."

"You're as much of a warrior as I am. More, perhaps. You didn't have the training I did. You learned it all as you went along. There's no more place for you in a world of genuine peace than there is for me. Why do you need the Dark Star s if you have peace? Why the fleets, the defence grids? Why your new and precious Babylon Five?

"Whom do you serve, Sheridan? It is not peace."

"The people of the Alliance."

"Which people? The Drazi, perhaps? Vizhak was with you from the start, and where is he now? Go to Zhabar one day and look around. Or perhaps the Centauri? Speak to them of the wonders of peace sometime.

"Or better yet, wait a few months. Wait until the Inquisitors arrive in force on your beloved Proxima. Then go and speak to the people there and talk of peace.

"Whom do you serve, Sheridan?"

Sheridan suddenly laughed. "Is that your question, then? What did the Shadows ask - 'What do you want?' That's how they tempted me, and so many others. 'Whom do you serve?' doesn't have quite the same ring to it."

"Then I'll try another question. Who are you? Do you even recognise the face in the mirror any longer?"

"Do you?" Sheridan snapped. "Enough of the questioning of me. Look at yourself. You've changed since the last time I saw you. All those Soul Hunters, all that death, they've unhinged you. Who are you these days, Sinoval? Whom do you serve?"

"Ah." Sinoval threw back his head and spread his arms wide. Behind him countless little lights began to emerge, and a chorus of voices rose as one. Tiny stars began to sparkle beneath his skin.

"That question, I think I can answer," he said, his voice sounding like many mixed into one. "You see, Sheridan. We are not so different after all."