Warren Murphy - Spoils Of War

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The entire U.S. army is being forced to wage war on its own people by a pontificating ten-preacher and the blonde Venus traveling as his wife. But, saints be praised, Remo and Chiun are of a different persuasion, and their unorthodox tactics leave many a zombie-eyed Christian soldier prostrate on the ground. Chaplains are dying left and right . . . an army base appears out of nowhere those answers to a higher authority than even the Pentagon. Agents of CURE postulate that a Mideast power may have created these apocalyptic events, but the facts are cloistered in secrecy. When Remo and Chiun look for answers, there's no room for sacred cows - and that's the gospel truth!

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"I'd rather you didn't," Smith said flatly. "The general the president sent for you knows your whereabouts."

«So what?"

"It doesn't hurt to be cautious."

"Why bother? You're going to see to it that the guy gets transferred to some obscure combat unit out in the Indian Ocean anyway."

There was a pause on the other end of the phone. "That was unnecessary, Remo," Smith said finally.

"But true."

Smith cleared his throat. "You'll be pleased to know that the investigation of Senator Nooner began today," he said, changing the subject. "It seems he got the Assistant to the Chief Clerk of Records at the Pentagon to switch the Vadassar files around, and then had the man killed. If s all coming out in the wash. The senator is going to face at least five hundred counts of murder. The case will make history."

"Happy as a clam, aren't you?" Remo said. ' "And Samantha Thwill is in custody in Texas on accessory charges. The army convoy picked up samples of everything in the kitchen at Vadassar, and if any of that stuff is drugged—as it probably is—the finger will point to her."

"Well, friend, my finger is pointing in a different

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direction," Remo said testily. "What you did to us was unjust and unfair."

"Somebody had to do it," Smith said. "Just get back here, and I'll see to it that you and Chiun get the vacation you deserve."

Remo's mouth dropped. "You mean it, Smitty? How'd you know? As a matter of fact, a vacation is exactly what we had in mind. Tahiti, I think. Tahiti would be great. You have the tickets ready, and we'll be there in four hours."

"I've already arranged for passage—"

"Aw, Smitty," Remo said, grinning, "you're really too much. I underestimated you. You're a prince. Chiun, we're on our way."

"—to Sinanju," Smith finished.

"What?"

"Chain's been asking me for months. I thought it would be a treat for the both of you."

Remo turned from the phone to stare beady darts at Chiun. The old Oriental smiled sweetly and nodded. "The sun shines nicely in Sinanju," Chiun said.

"Thanks, Smitty," Remo said. He decided not to kick a hole in the wall. "Remind me to bring you a souvenir from the glorious shores of Sinanju. Like maybe a poisonous snake. And I hope this case puts you up to your pecker in paperwork."

He hung up with a clatter and yanked the telephone cord out of the wall.

"Are we on our way to Emperor Smith?" Chiun asked, his feet bouncing in a little dance of joy.

Remo pulled down the shade to the nicotine-colored window. In the darkness, he kicked off his shoes and plopped onto one of the room's two sagging beds. A puff of dust rose from the blankets. "We're staying here," he said. "Forever. I'm never

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leaving this room. We'll probably come down with some filthy disease and die here, and it'll serve Smitty right. Sinanju. Fll bet you two were in on this all along."

Chiun continued to dip and swirl in the darkened room, his thin voice chanting a happy Western melody:

Disco Lady

Won't you be my baby . . .

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