Hesh Kestin - The Siege of Tel Aviv

Kuwait sues in the International Court of Justice at the Hague for return of its sixty F/A-18s—London’s Daily Mail gleefully summarizes the charge sheet as “Grand Theft Air Force”—but the judges rule for Israel after documents are entered into evidence proving Kuwait a veteran financial supporter of international terror in general and anti-Israel terror specifically. The aircraft are termed spoils of war.

ALEKSEI TUPIKOV, THE RUSSIAN general in charge of GRU operations in the Middle East, is transferred to Washington as nominal second commercial secretary. One evening, at a diplomatic reception, he comes face to face with Misha Shulman, now director of covert operations for the Mossad. Though Misha never met the Russian during the war—the GRU mission in Jerusalem was helicoptered out before the first Israeli tank entered the city—Tupikov’s role, and the role of the GRU, becomes public knowledge when Israel releases video of the meetings of the Islamic Liberation Council in the boardroom of Israel Discount Bank in Jerusalem. In their hurry to leave, the Russians neglected to remove the cameras they installed.

Ten days after the reception, Tupikov’s body is found by a jogger in Rock Creek Park, his penis stuffed in his mouth.

The Mossad launches an investigation in parallel with that of the District of Columbia Police Department and the FBI. The American cops come up with many suspects but no indictments. The Mossad immediately identifies the killer, but its objection is not to the crime but to the concomitant flouting of bureaucratic principle: no one authorized the hit. Rather than return to Israel to face disciplinary action, Misha elects to resign from the agency. He moves to Los Angeles to produce action films where the crooks invariably outsmart the police. Variety’s headline is succinct:

With Pinky retired, General Ido Baram takes over as IDF chief of staff, surprising everyone, considering his background in armor, by setting about building up the Israel Navy. Eight nuclear-powered submarines are ordered from a hastily formed shipbuilding conglomerate led by Isracorp. To head the effort, Yigal chooses a pragmatic engineer named Alon Peri.

Perhaps as a result of the shortage of available young men after the war, Alex finds a very understanding and enthusiastic girlfriend. She marries him on condition that he retire from the air force. Together they set up a fashion house based on designs Alex often sketched between flights. Within five years, the name Alex joins that of Dior and Chanel in the highest ranks of haute couture. Beyond high profits and praise from the fashion press, the House of Alex wins the ultimate in recognition: knockoffs appear in shops all over the world.

Of the three Super Hornet pilots at USMA Forward Base Wildcat, Captains Stanley Field and Christian Thurston re-enlist; Jimbo leaves the service to attend Yale Divinity School, where he speaks standard English.

Israel’s ambassador to the United Nations remains on the job in New York and later becomes director general of the foreign ministry. But Shai Oren’s career will never reach a higher point than on the day Jerusalem is liberated, when he stands before the General Assembly to deliver, in sixteen words, the shortest speech ever given at the United Nations, and perhaps in diplomatic history.

“Distinguished representatives,” Ambassador Oren says, before even one of his colleagues can reach the exit. “The State of Israel is pleased to confirm its existence. Get used to it.”

Based on a True Story

The Iron Will of Shoeshine Cats

The Lie

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THE SIEGE OF TEL AVIV. Copyright © 2019, text by Hesh Kestin. All rights reserved, except for brief quotations in critical articles or reviews. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without prior written permission from the publisher: Dzanc Books, 5220 Dexter Ann Arbor Rd., Ann Arbor, MI 48103.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Kestin, Hesh, author.

Title: The siege of Tel Aviv : a novel / by Hesh Kestin.

Description: Ann Arbor, MI : Dzanc Books, 2018.

Identifiers: LCCN 2018051981 | ISBN 9781945814839

Subjects: | GSAFD: War stories | Fantasy fiction

Classification: LCC PS3611.E87 S53 2018 | DDC 813.6--dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2018051981

First US edition: April 2019

Printed in the United States of America

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“Besides which, I am too.”

“Ten minutes. Go warm up the bed.”

“Who needs a bed?”

“Darling, the cabin is wired.”