Olan Thorensen - Cast Under an Alien Sun

A polite feminine cough from behind him interrupted Culich’s reverie. His attention riveted back to the eleven men at the table looking at him, waiting for him to say . . . what?

Oh yes, first the routine matters before we get to the Narthani.

He cleared his throat and turned in his chair toward Maera, holding out a hand to receive two sheets of paper. “As usual, let’s review the last meeting.”

In the next hour the men summarized the results of action they were to have taken, then moved on to new items: reviews of crop status, sightings of larger predators shadowing herds of horses (three boyermen from the region agreed to coordinate hunting parties), a landslide blocking the mountain pass to Dornfeld Province for a sixday (dug out from both ends), a renewed request from the Elwyin boyerman for help in building a new abbey complex for their growing population (granted), a missing family from a farm in Wycoff (fruitless intensive search and no answer to what happened), the announcement of an agreed-on marriage of a daughter of Boyerman Funvir to a Hewell Province boyerman’s family—on and on, for the next two hours.

Culich’s attention drifted as the meeting moved into less pressing items, when once again he was aware of silence. He glanced down at the agenda Maera had outlined and saw that his finger rested on the last item. Oh yes, finally to the Narthani.

“As you all know, Boyerman Dornfeld sent a report that one of his fishing boats came on a new Narthani fleet heading to Preddi City. The fishermen ran for our coast, but from their descriptions, the Narthani ships included both warships and cargo vessels. At least some of the vessels had decks crowded with armed men. I’m afraid we must assume the Narthani brought in even more fighting men.”

The men shifted uneasily in their chairs and murmured to themselves and one another. Tilston of the Brums District spoke first. “If they are fighting men, do we have any idea if they intend staying? Maybe they’re just passing through. Perhaps re-provisioning for a further voyage.”

“Possible,” said a dubious Culich, “though we should assume not. As the Word says, ‘ Plan for hard times and not the best . ’ I believe we must assume the Narthani made a permanent increase to their forces here on Caedellium.”

“To what purpose?” queried Boyerman Lanthan of the Elwin District. Lanthan already knew Culich’s answer. He was one of the boyermen who equally shared Culich’s fears about the future intentions of the Narthani.

“Since they have an iron grip on Preddi, and since Selfcell and Eywell seem firmly under their control, we have to continue to consider the possibility the Narthani aren’t satisfied with the part of Caedellium they now control. While there’s so far been no sign of Narthani action against other clans, we need to be alert to the danger. I’ll continue to discuss this with the other hetmen at every opportunity.

“I’ve asked Vortig Luwis to make another assessment of the clan’s strength and to make plans for increased patrols of our northern border with Eywell. He’ll report back to us at a future meeting. For now, you all need to be sure of weapons preparation and that every able-bodied man knows how to use them. I know both weapons practice and the patrols take the men away from their work, so do the best you can.”

The meeting continued for another two hours, with midday meal served in the room. There were no other major decisions made, but the time allowed every boyerman, representative, and aide to express himself and be listened to, such that by the time the meeting adjourned, all attendees understood the clan’s future intentions and were satisfied their own views had been heard.

With the formal conclusion of the meeting, Culich mingled with the other men as they prepared to depart for home, while Kennrick, Luwis, and Maera went over her notes, from which she would prepare the written account of the meeting. Culich was about to leave when he noticed Boyerman Arwin sitting and looking his way.

God’s curse on it! I forgot about Belman .

He stopped and berated himself for using God’s name in such a manner. Chastised and forgiving himself, he approached the instigator to see what he had to say for himself. In a way, it was a relief to deal with something as irritating as Arwin. At least, it was a problem he could deal with, whereas the Narthani might need a miracle from God to solve.

Yozef’s plan to find ways to use his chemistry knowledge without getting in trouble gave him a focus, but no solution. A sixday later, he still groped for a practical first introduction. His being pleased with himself to have a plan—any plan—was fading on the evening he looked forward to a session at the Snarling Graeko. He hadn’t the faintest clue what a graeko was or why it should be snarling. The sign hanging in front of the pub depicted a creature resembling a cross between a warthog and a hyena. Carnigan had never seen one, didn’t know anyone who had ever seen one, and didn’t know whether they were real or mythical. All Carnigan knew was the pub had the best beer.

Carnigan always went straight to the same corner table. If the table was occupied, it always became available on Carnigan’s approach, the current occupants suddenly finding another table more to their liking.

When Yozef first came to the pub with Carnigan, the two of them drank alone, but over time, a few regular customers joined them, as if seeing that Yozef had survived had emboldened them. On this night that everything changed for Yozef, they were joined by two other regulars, and by the second beer, the three Caedelli told Anyar jokes, some of which Yozef had already heard before, sometimes more than once, sometimes so many times he could have told them from memory. One advantage of the strength of Caedellium beer was that by the second stein, even an old joke was hilarious. Yozef figured he got about a third of the jokes, understood the references but didn’t get the humor about another third, and had no clue why the other third were amusing.

The three Caedelli started their third stein to Yozef’s nursing of his second, when Filtin Fuller, a cheerful man in his mid-twenties sitting next to Yozef, decided it was the turn of the newcomer to contribute.

“Yozef, it’s your turn! We’ve never heard jokes or stories from you. Since you aren’t from Caedellium, you must have new ones. Let’s hear some!”

“Good idea,” declared Carnigan, with a mighty fist to the tabletop. “Let’s hear something, Yozef.”

Yozef sat frozen for a few seconds before Carnigan urged him again. Jokes? He wasn’t good at remembering jokes. And what would be a joke here? It couldn’t have any Earth references, and what he knew about the local style of humor wasn’t encouraging. What if he told a joke that turned out to be offensive? Yet this wasn’t an interview for a guest spot on the Tonight Show . Most likely, what would happen was that with the ones he remembered, they either wouldn’t get them or wouldn’t think they were funny.

The three men looked at him expectantly, quaffing their steins while they waited.

He took a deep breath and launched in. “There’s this man in the village working in his shop when suddenly an angel appears before him. Naturally, the man is startled, but, being a devout person, he kneels before the angel and asks why he is so honored. The angel tells him, ‘Because you are such a good man, God has granted you a great favor. Unfortunately, there is good news and bad news.’ ‘Oh, please tell me the good news first,’ said the man. ‘God knows that when most people pass on from this life, they leave many tasks undone and many people to whom they did not say their last goodbyes. God has granted you to be told one year in advance that your time has come, and that is why I have appeared to you.’ ‘You mean it’s good news that I have a year to live?’ said the shocked man. ‘Well,’ said an embarrassed angel, ‘the bad news is that I’ve looked for you since a year ago today.’”