Уолтер Мосли - Blue Light

“I am innocent, Inspector,” Claudia said with a shrug, staring intently at the wavering Bonhomme. He noticed the sweat on her forehead.

“You are not, Mrs. Zimmerman.”

“Call me Claudia Heart,” she commanded.

“I don’t know what power it is that you think you have over men, Mrs. Zimmerman. But I am going to have you up on charges of assault and murder.” Inspector Bonhomme turned quickly and went through the interrogation-room door. He knew that if the woman had stood up and approached him, he would have gladly let her go.

“Should I have her transferred to a holding cell, Christian?” Lonnie Briggs asked.

“No. No. Leave her right where she is. Open that door only to bring her meals. Don’t talk to her. You hear me, Briggs? Don’t say a word to her.”

“Yes, sir.”

After snapping his ankle chain, Winch Fargo slammed his hard and skinny body against the ironbound door in the darkness. No one heard the dull thudding deep under the desert floor.

Gray Man walked through the towering forest, unconcerned with the beauty of the redwoods, unconvinced by their grandeur. His leather dress shoes were broken, his black jacket torn. Gray Man’s clothes were spattered with mud, but he didn’t care. He was waging a war in his mind with Horace LaFontaine, the first soul he’d ever met that he could not easily destroy.

He’d built Horace out of leftover memories, scraps of a wasted life in the shell of a body that had died. The persona, a loose association of thoughts, had been useful when Gray Man wanted to understand what humanity demanded of its citizens. Humanity — like rutting shrimp in a shipwreck at the bottom of the sea. Humanity — globs of self-referential fats and amino acids that couldn’t know the source of existence even if they were spoon-fed that knowledge in the lap of their own pitiful God.

Horace was a perfect example of this primitive life-form. He’d absorbed the inaccurate language, shared the mindless lusts. He was seen as nothing even among the useless, and still his will had stymied the great Gray Man.

Grey Redstar, the Gray Man, the reaper of lost light. The one creature destined to cleanse the soul of its body. The harbinger of a newer and higher form of being.

But as powerful as he was, he could not stop the disease within him, this vague alliance of memories attached around the name Horace LaFontaine.

He’d crucified Horace, stripped his flesh down to the bone and crushed out the cells that remembered him. But every time, Horace had risen out of the depths of Death’s mind — whole again, though broken and afraid.

“Please let me alone,” Horace cried.

“Then die,” Gray Man answered. “Let your life stop and leave me to accomplish my own ends.”

“I cain’t die,” Horace cried. “I mean, I keep comin’ back. I don’t know why. I’m sorry. But if you leave Joclyn be, I won’t have to fight wit’ you no more.”

“You would threaten me?”

“I cain’t he’p it, man. I cain’t. It didn’t bother me when you kilt all them other ones. But I like Joclyn, and whenever she’s around, I just come up in your mind, like. An’ even if you wanna do sumpin’ bad to ’er, I still like ’er an’ don’t want that.”

Gray Man screamed in his mind, and for a moment Horace faded out of existence. But he was still there, there in the fabric of cells and light. Horace LaFontaine was like a mutating virus that had lodged itself deep in the cells of the god of death. The only cure would be to divest himself of the body and release the beautiful deep blue light into the heavens.

In the yawning space between earth and sky and the bright sun, she had stood for 734,906 mornings. From a sapling bole to branchling finger. From a straining prayer for light to the crashing death of her mother. And then that straight run upward and outward. Not even the black bear’s raking claws could stop her. Not gnawing worms or lightning bolts or shifting soft earth could hinder her stretching, yearning ascent...

... and then the different light, knifing down on her needles and sinking below the bark. Not for a year did she even feel it. Not for three did she know that she knew anything, and then she knew more than even the longevity of trees can witness. The tickling wings of butterflies and the nuzzling snouts of deer and lion and rat. She felt and knew the scrabbling claws of birds in her branches and among her leaves.

And then there was the sun shining. The pulsing story of creation humming again and again through her inner timber. So beautiful that it called a song from her depths, a song that flowed out through the atmosphere and deep into the soil and stone of the earth. She was calling to awareness the very atoms that composed the world. She purred and rumbled out the song of awakening that only a patient tree could know. She called and counted butterflies; she bathed in morning fogs and knew her sisters even though they were still unconscious as she was on the day before the light.

She reached down farther in the earth and stretched her leaves upward. Her seed fell barren to the ground, and she knew that she was merely a beacon. I say that she knew, but it was not knowledge as we hold it. The green cell is the engine in plants where blue light is purely mind. And blue light is knowledge, the truth before it is warped by perception of eyes and solitary minds. Plants, and some simple animals, are best suited for holding and sharing the light.

The unity of living flesh and divine light is still more a dream than reality. The light strains to reach the flesh that stretches toward it. But they are not yet one, not even for that woody giant. To reproduce herself, then, she could only sing, waiting for a mate to come. Waiting for the moment when she reached maturity.

He approached the ancient tree with no more concern than a woodsman.

“What are you doing here?” Esther the park ranger asked Gray Man. She’d just come from around the tree and was startled by the appearance of the hobo.

Ever since the day she came awake before the great tree, covered in butterflies, with the memory of those bright blue eyes in hers, she came to visit the tree at least once a week. She came to listen to a nearly subliminal thrumming and to watch the wild animals that came in almost religious obeisance. There is magic near that tree , that’s what the ranger thought.

Gray Man ignored her question, craning his neck to see the full height of the towering column.

“Excuse me, sir, but I’m doing research in this area and it’s off-limits to visitors. If you want to see trees, you have to stay on the paths as they are marked.”

Gray Man raised his hands and laughed. Sparks leaped from his fingertips.

“What are you doing?” Esther asked in a trembling voice.

Somewhere inside the tree the trembling was echoed, though not in fear.

Gray Man’s laugh died at the challenge, and suddenly Horace came back to life. He could see what Gray Man was doing, but he had no power to stop him. He had no desire to save a dumb tree.

“Stop it!” cried Esther O’Halloran as she ran at Gray Man with a dead branch for her club.

The electrical shock was enough to shatter the branch and throw the woman down a small incline into a stream. Gray Man gazed upon her with anger that he’d not felt toward a human before. But he was upset, upset by Horace LaFontaine.

Horace looked at the woman and thought, Fool, why you wanna go messin’ ’round and gettin’ yourself kilt like that anyway? I don’t wanna see you die, but I ain’t gettin’ skinned alive again just ’cause you a fool.

The timber of the redwood groaned, and Gray Man knew that this frail being meant something to the tree. He smiled at the possibility of inflicting pain before death and turned toward the park ranger. Her eyes were rolled up into her head, but still she struggled to rise.