Robert Heinlein - The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress

While helped Earthside, greatest good was in Luna. Loonies become more unified over this silly huhu than had ever been before. They took it personally and "Adam Selene" and "Simon Jester" pushed it. Loonies are easygoing except on one subject, women. Every lady felt insulted by Terran news stories--so male Loonies who had ignored politics suddenly discovered I was their boy.

Spin-off--old lags feel superior to those not transported. Later found self greeted by ex-cons with: "Hi, jailbird!" A lodge greeting--I was accepted.

But saw nothing good about it then! Pushed around, treated like cattle, fingerprinted, photographed, given food we wouldn't offer hogs, exposed to endless indignity, and only that heavy field kept me from trying to kill somebody--had I been wearing number-six arm when grabbed, might have tried.

But steadied down once I was freed. Hour later we were on way to Agra; had at last been summoned by committee. Felt good to be back in suite in maharajah's palace but eleven-hour zone change in less than three did not permit rest; we went to hearing bleary-eyed and held together by drugs.

"Hearing" was one-sided; we listened while chairman talked. Talked an hour; I'll summarize:

Our preposterous claims were rejected. Lunar Authority's sacred trust could not be abandoned. Disorders on Earth's Moon could not be tolerated. Moreover, recent disorders showed that Authority had been too lenient. Omission was now to be corrected by an activist program, a five-year plan in which all phases of life in Authority's trusteeship would be overhauled. A code of laws was being drafted; civil and criminal courts would be instituted for benefit of "client-employees"--which meant all persons in trust area, not just consignees with uncompleted sentences. Public schools would be established, plus indoctrinal adult schools for client-employees in need of same. An economic, engineering, and agricultural planning board would be created to provide fullest and most efficient use of Moon's resources and labor of client-employees. An interim goal of quadrupling grain shipments in five years had been adopted as a figure easily obtainable once scientific planning of resources and labor was in effect. First phase would be to withdraw client-employees from occupations found not to be productive and put them to drilling a vast new system of farm tunnels in order that hydroponics would commence in them not later than March 2078. These new giant farms would be operated by Lunar Authority, scientifically, and not left to whims of private owners. It was contemplated that this system would, by end of five-year plan, produce entire new grain quota; in meantime client-employees producing grain privately would be allowed to continue. But they would be absorbed into new system as their less efficient methods were no longer needed.

Chairman looked up from papers. "In short, the Lunar colonies are going to be civilized and brought into managerial coordination with the rest of civilization. Distasteful as this task has been, I feel--speaking as a citizen rather than as chairman of this committee--I feel that we owe you thanks for bringing to our attention a situation so badly in need of correction."

Was ready to burn his ears off. "Client-employees!" What a fancy way to say "slaves"! But Prof said tranquilly, "I find the proposed plans most interesting. Is one permitted to ask questions? Purely for information?"

"For information, yes."

North American member leaned forward. "But don't assume that we are going to take any backtalk from you cavemen! So mind your manners. You aren't in the clear on this, you know."

"Order," chairman said. "Proceed, Professor."

"This term 'client-employee' I find intriguing. Can it be stipulated that the majority of inhabitants of Earth's major satellite are not undischarged consignees but free individuals?"

"Certainly," chairman agreed blandly. "All legal aspects of the new policy have been studied. With minor exceptions some ninety-one percent of the colonists have citizenship, original or derived, in various member nations of the Federated Nations. Those who wish to return to their home countries have a right to do so. You will be pleased to learn that the Authority is considering a plan under which loans for transportation can be arranged... probably under supervision of International Red Cross and Crescent. I might add that I myself am heartily backing this plan--as it renders nonsensical any talk about 'slave labor.'" He smiled smugly.

"I see," agreed Prof. "Most humane. Has the committee--or the Authority--pondered the fact that most--effectively all, I should say--considered the fact that inhabitants of Luna are physically unable to live on this planet? That they have undergone involuntary permanent exile through irreversible physiological changes and can never again live in comfort and health in a gravitational field six times greater than that to which their bodies have become adjusted?"

Scoundrel pursed lips as if considering totally new idea. "Speaking again for myself, I would not be prepared to stipulate that what you say is necessarily true. It might be true of some, might not be others; people vary widely. Your presence here proves that it is not impossible for a Lunar inhabitant to return to Earth. In any case we have no intention of forcing anyone to return. We hope that they will choose to stay and we hope to encourage others to emigrate to the Moon. But these are individual choices, under the freedoms guaranteed by the Great Charter. But as to this alleged physiological phenomenon--it is not a legal matter. If anyone deems it prudent, or thinks he would be happier, to stay on the Moon, that's his privilege."

"I see, sir. We are free. Free to remain in Luna and work, at tasks and for wages set by you... or free to return to Earth to die."

Chairman shrugged. "You assume that we are villians--we're not. Why, if I were a young man I would emigrate to the Moon myself. Great opportunities! In any case I am not troubled by your distortions--history will justify us."

Was surprised at Prof; he was not fighting. Worried about him--weeks of strain and a bad night on top. All he said was, "Honorable Chairman, I assume that shipping to Luna will soon be resumed. Can passage be arranged for my colleague and myself in the first ship? For I must admit, sir, that this gravitational weakness of which I spoke is, in our cases, very real. Our mission is completed; we need to go home."

(Not a word about grain barges. Nor about "throwing rocks," nor even futility of beating a cow. Prof just sounded tired.)

Chairman leaned forward and spoke with grim satisfaction. "Professor, that presents difficulties. To put it bluntly, you appear to be guilty of treason against the Great Charter, indeed against all humanity... and an indictment is being considered. I doubt if anything more than a suspended sentence would be invoked against a man of your age and physical condition, however. Do you think it would be prudent of us to give you passage back to the place where you committed these acts--there to stir up more mischief?"

Prof sighed. "I understand your point. Then, sir, may I be excused? I am weary."

"Certainly. Hold yourself at the disposal of this committee. The hearing stands adjourned. Colonel Davis--"

"Sir?" I was directing wheel chair around, to get Prof out at once; our attendants had been sent outside.

"A word with you, please. In my office."

"Uh--" Looked at Prof; eyes were closed and seemed unconscious. But he moved one finger, motioning me to him. "HonorabIe Chairman, I'm more nurse than diplomat; have to look after him. He's an old man, he's ill."

"The attendants will take care of him."

"Well..." Got as close to Prof as I could from chair, leaned over him. "Prof, are you right?"

He barely whispered. "See what he wants. Agree with him. But stall."