Amy Thomson - The Color of Distance

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Juna is the sole survivor of a team of surveyors marooned in the dense and isolated Tendu rainforest, an uninhabitable world for humans. Her only hope for survival is total transformation—and terrifying assimilation—into the amphibian Tendu species. Now she speaks as they speak. She fears what they fear. And in surviving as they survive, Juna will come to fathom more about her own human nature than ever before…
Nominated for Philip K. Dick Award in 1996.

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She missed Eerin already. Eerin had acted so differently when she was with the other new creatures. Her skin was strangely still while she made the mouth noises that passed as communication among the humans. Only when she translated what Dr. Bremen had said did her skin come alive. It felt like Eerin was gone even before she walked out of the jungle and got on the new creatures’ raft.

Moki was taking this hard. A ripple of regret passed over Anitonen’s skin, and she touched his shoulder reassuringly. He shrugged off her touch, his eyes never leaving the floating island. Orphaned bami his age almost never recovered from the loss of their sitik. Even with the kindest of care, they wasted away and died, or vanished into the forest, never to be seen again. Moki was exceptionally intelligent and fiercely determined, but the same determination that drove him to follow them through the jungle worked against him now as he clung to his sitik.

Anitonen laid a hand on his shoulder. He turned to look at her. “Eerin isn’t dead, Moki. You’ll see her tomorrow,” she told him.

Moki turned to look at the ship again without responding.

Ukatonen touched Anitonen on the shoulder. “Go on, we’ll sit here together for a while.”

Anitonen nodded and swung off into the trees. She settled on a high branch and looked out at the humans’ island, watching the new creatures come and go. How was she going to fit all of these strangers into her world?

Anitonen shook her head. First she had to deal with the problem of Lyanan. Their resentment of the humans had softened, thanks to Eerin’s patience, hard work, and skill, but it could flare again if the negotiations went badly.

She needed to find some form of exchange that would satisfy both humans and Tendu. It needed to be valuable and easily divided, so that it could be used to help excuse the obligations that Lyanan had incurred while they were replanting the forest. It also had to be something that the humans were willing to trade.

Eerin had explained that there were very strict limits on what the humans would give to the Tendu. The humans couldn’t give the Tendu anything that they didn’t already have or use. This seemed like a strange rule to Anitonen. Why trade for something that the other person already had? Eerin had explained that the humans were afraid that the Tendu might hurt themselves with the gifts that they gave them. Too many new things might make the Tendu change too fast. Anitonen shook her head. Why should the humans worry about what the Tendu might do with their trade goods? That was the enkar’s concern. If the enkar didn’t like the way things were going, it was up to them to stop it.

It wasn’t going to be easy to find trade goods that would settle the issue. She shook her head again, rippling frustration, and set off to find Lalito. They needed to discuss what Lyanan wanted to get out of the negotiations.

The humans arrived for the meeting shortly before noon the next day. Anitonen watched with Ukatonen and Moki as the humans headed toward the beach in their strange self-propelled rafts. As they drew closer, Anitonen saw Eerin sitting in the bow of the first raft. Her body was covered with clothing. How was she going to be able to talk when she was all covered up? Moki scrambled down the tree and out onto the cliffs, eager to greet his sitik. Anitonen lifted her ears inquiringly at Ukatonen.

“I told him he could escort the humans to the meeting. He’ll get to see Eerin, and be quieter during the negotiations.”

“Shouldn’t you keep Moki away from her?”

“It would be like keeping the ocean away from the beach. Those two need each other too much.”

“But you’re supposed to become Moki’s sitik now.”

Ukatonen shook his head and looked away. “Moki won’t accept me,” he said, grey with sadness. “Some other solution must be found.”

“What other solution is there?” Anitonen asked.

Ukatonen shook his head. “I don’t know.”

Anitonen looked at him. He had rendered the judgment that Juna should be allowed to adopt Moki. If Moki died, so would he. Someday she might face a similar threat. For a moment she longed to be back in Narmolom, where life was simple. But her people needed her here.

The humans reached the top of the cliff. Eerin carried Moki on her shoulders. He was radiantly turquoise with happiness. Eerin seemed pleased as well, though it was hard to tell through all that alien clothing The other humans paused just outside the forest while Eerin stepped behind a bush. Anitonen"rippled relief as Eerin emerged, naked and familiar, her clothing in a bundle under her arm.

Anitonen and Ukatonen followed the humans through the forest. A few humans glanced up as branches bowed and rustled, but none of them appeared to see the two enkar. They were too busy trying to look at everything, and as a result, they saw very little.

At last they neared the river bank, where the meeting was to take place. They hurried ahead, and were waiting with Lalito and the other Tendu on the soft, damp sand when the humans arrived.

Moki came in first, head high, obviously proud to be entrusted with the duty of escorting his sitik and the other humans through the forest to this meeting.

“Greetings to the people of Lyanan, and to the enkar who have kindly agreed to attend this meeting,” Eerin said in flawless formal skin speech. “May I present Dr. Bremen, the chief elder of the humans who have come here. Dr. Wu, whose atwa is learning about the Tendu; Dr. Tanguay, who has the same atwa; Dr. Nazariefj, whose atwa is learning about the Tendu’s world; and Captain Edison, whose atwa is the floating island.”

It was a fine introduction. Eerin’s time among the enkar had not been wasted. Anitonen suppressed a flare of pride and stepped forward to reply.

“We are honored to meet you. I hope we can achieve harmony between our two peoples,” Anitonen replied in equally formal skin speech. “May I present Lalito, chief elder of the village of Lyanan, and her bami, Lani. This is Sarito, who is on the village council, and his bami, Ehna. This is the enkar Ukatonen, and his bami, Moki"—Moki flinched at that—"and this is the enkar Garitonen.” She felt silly introducing Ukatonen and Garitonen as enkar, when it was implicit in their names, but Eerin had said that it was a good idea. “I am the enkar Anitonen,” she continued. “My atwa concerns Eerin and the other humans, so I will be guiding these talks toward harmony.”

Anitonen waited while Eerin translated her speech into the noisy sound talk that the new creatures used. It took a long time. Then Dr. Bremen got up and said something.

“Greetings,” Eerin translated for Dr. Bremen. “We are honored to meet you. I hope that we can achieve harmony between our people.”

Lalito stepped forward and delivered a speech about the conditions at Lyanan, describing how her people had suffered from the destruction of the forest. Eerin asked her to pause several times while she translated her words into sound talk for the humans.

When the speech ended, the humans conferred noisily among themselves. It reminded Anitonen of a flock of kidala birds, and she suppressed a ripple of amusement. Then the one called Dr. Wu stood up to speak.

“Eerin has told us of the damage that we caused to your people, and we wish to make reparations. We want to meet our obligations in this matter. As a pledge for reparations, please accept this gift from us.” He gestured, and one of the others brought forward a large coil of rope of very fine quality. It was a handsome gift.

“We thank you for this gift,” Anitonen replied, “and we hope that these talks bring our people into harmony.”

“It is our wish to keep the disruption our people cause to a minimum,” Wu said. “We want to introduce the things that we make very slowly. We are afraid that certain trade goods might cause changes that you would not like, and we don’t want that to happen. Though this limits the ways we can fulfill our obligations to you, I believe harmony can be achieved in this matter. It may take longer, but everyone involved will be happier with the decision. We hope that these agreements will last for many generations. Therefore we need to think everything through very carefully. I ask for your patience and understanding as we bargain.”

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