Steven Harper - Trickster

"Nothing. I envy nothing."

"Did you wake up this morning with an erection?"

This question clearly caught the Alpha off-guard. "What? I… that's none of-"

"Computer records indicate that you awoke with an erection this morning and you masturbated in the shower," the Delta said. "But you have refused to confess your impurity. The N-waves course through your brain even as we speak. Only by confessing what you have done can you rid yourself of them and become one with Dream. Confess!"

Martina stared at the Delta in disbelief. They spied on the bathrooms? What "impurities" had she committed that had been caught and recorded?

The Alpha looked like he wished the floor would open up and swallow him. "I… I… "

"Did you wake with an erection?" barked the Delta. "Answer!"

"Yes," the Alpha said in a small voice.

As one, the Deltas pointed at him with green-gloved fingers. "Impure!" they boomed. The word echoed like thunder through the room.

"Did you masturbate in the shower?" snapped the Delta.

"Yes."

"Impure!" roared all the Deltas. Delta Maura elbowed Martina in the side and gestured sharply at the central Alpha. The other Deltas did the same with their own charges. The Alphas, including Martina, all pointed and said, "Impure," though without much force or conviction.

"Did you lust after women while you committed this impurity?"

"Yes."

Another nudge. "Impure!" everyone thundered.

"What other impurities did you commit?" the Delta asked.

Tears were leaking from the Alpha's eyes now. "I… I envied other people their freedom."

"Impure!"

"I was hungry and wished for more food," he said.

"Impure!"

"I envied Dreamer Roon's ability to enter the Dream without drugs."

"Impure!" By now, the chorus was strong and solid. Martina said it automatically, as did Utang across from her. The man confessed two more impurities, then broke down and cried, whether from simple humiliation or genuine sorrow at what he had done, Martina couldn't tell. Either way, she didn't blame him for the tears. The Delta got up, knelt next to his chair, and put an arm around him.

"It is finished for now," he said in a kind, fatherly voice. "You've confessed some of your impurities and they will bring you no more N-waves. You are that much closer to Irfan now. Come."

The Delta took the Alpha back to his chair and gave him a small chocolate snack cake. Martina's stomach growled and she found herself staring at the Alpha as he ate the cake. Her earlier craving for sweets awoke. Perhaps her current envy would be a good impurity to confess.

The Delta in charge chose another Alpha, a young woman, for the Confessional. She sat down, nervously gathering her voluminous yellow trousers around her.

"You reek of impurity," the Delta intoned. "The N-waves radiate from your mind and spread your filth to all those around you. You must rid yourself of these things. Confess!"

The Alpha twisted her hands in her lap, refusing to look up.

"What impurities have you committed?" the Delta demanded.

"I guess I… I envied Dreamer Roon his ability to enter the Dream so easily."

"Impure!"

"I wanted more food."

"Impure!"

The relentless confessions continued. Most of the Alphas broke down crying, and each got a small snack cake. Martina found herself shouting and pointing with full enthusiasm. At first the fervor had been pretended, an attempt to blend in, but the ritual gesture and shout began to take on a life of its own. The words rang through Martina's body, echoing around the bare room and banging against her very bones. The confessions came more readily. Alphas confessed to anger, greed, pride, unhappiness, and lust. One woman said she envied Martina her beauty. At every turn, the word "Impure" thundered through the room.

Finally Utang was chosen. He sat down without looking at Martina. Indeed, he didn't look at anyone. Misery was carved into his very posture. The Delta called out to him to confess.

"I woke with an erection," he said. This was a fairly standard confession among the male Alphas by now, though Martina found herself embarrassed again. The sound of his voice also brought her to the edge of tears. It was a sound from her childhood, and one she had thought she'd never hear again.

"Impure!" boomed the circle.

"I disbelieved Dreamer Roon when he said he could enter the Dream without drugs."

"Impure!"

"I became angry at my Delta."

"Impure!"

"I… I… " Utang seemed to cast about for something to confess. "I had lustful thoughts about that woman," he said, pointing at one.

A shock cracked through Martina's body. She cried out in pain, as did the other Alphas. Utang stiffened, then went limp with a moan.

"That was a lie," said the Delta. "In the Dream there are no untruths, and every lie you tell sends you further away from it than any other impurity. For that reason, all your fellow Alphas have suffered. You do not need to fabricate impurities, Alpha. You have plenty enough to confess."

Utang opened his eyes. They were glazed with sorrow. Several of the Alphas were rubbing their shackled wrists and glaring at him with undisguised anger. Martina found her own temper rising, though her ire wasn't directed toward Utang.

Utang was guided back to his seat. He sat staring down at his hands while the others continued to glare. The Delta didn't give him a snack cake.

"Your turn, dear," Delta Maura said with another elbow nudge. Martina was starting to find the woman annoying.

Martina got up and took the central chair. It felt strange. All eyes were on her, even the ones behind her where she couldn't see. Abruptly, she felt vulnerable and alone.

"Confess, Alpha!" barked the Delta. "What impurities have you committed?"

Martina decided to get it over with. "I envied the other Alphas their cake."

"Impure!"

Martina had to force herself not to shrink back into the chair at the shout. It was even louder and more forceful when she was sitting here, alone in the center of the circle. She felt naked despite her voluminous clothing.

"I disbelieved Dreamer Roon's writings," she said.

"Impure!"

"I questioned the wisdom of Delta Maura."

"Impure."

Martina cast about for more. Except for Utang, the other Alphas hadn't been allowed to leave the Confessional until they had confessed to at least four or five impurities. But Martina couldn't think of anything she had done that was impure. There had to be something. Think!

Inspiration struck. "I wanted to keep track of time."

"Impure!"

"I tried to disobey my Delta during Dreamer Roon's speech today."

"Impure!"

"I was proud of the fact that I was keeping my name." Martina blinked. Where had that come from?

"Impure!"

The word pounded at her body. To her horror, Martina felt a few tears leaking from her eyes. Then she decided to take advantage of it and pretend to be more upset than she already was. She dropped her face into her hands and let her shoulders shake in false despair. The bio-sensors in her slave shackles, the ones that had no doubt caught Utang's lie, wouldn't catch a falsehood she didn't vocalize-she hoped. Besides, the tears wetting her gloves were real.

She felt no shock, and after a moment, a light touch on her shoulder told her she could rise. Delta Maura seated her in the half-circle and gave her a snack cake. Martina tore the wrapping away and wolfed it down. The sugar raced through her, creating a momentary high that mingled with a sense of relief. She felt immeasurably better.

"Confessional has ended," the Delta said. "You may stand and speak to one another."

The Alphas all got up stretched. Martina almost bolted across the circle to Utang, but forced herself to move casually. He met her halfway.