Julia Karr - Truth

“I didn’t say that,” I said. The tears welled up inside me. I couldn’t make this choice. “I need time to think.”

“Maybe you should learn to think on your feet. But as I told Kasimir, in all fairness—and you can thank me for this later—you should have twenty-four hours to give him an answer. It’s classic film noir, isn’t it? Always give the poor sap time to squirm.” He tucked his PAV back in his pocket. “I’ll be in touch. Twenty. Four. Hours. Six p.m. tomorrow.” Straightening his jacket, he said, “Oh, I nearly forgot. If anything out of the ordinary happens—if the Jenkinses should happen suddenly to disappear, or if anything else suspicious happens—your grandfather’s a dead man. I’ll show myself out.”

I crumpled to the floor. What was I going to do? The Jenkinses had taken in Dee and me without hesitation. They’d treated us like family—they were family, practically all I had. Burying my face in my hands, all I could see was Pops’s limp form.

I couldn’t betray them—could I?

I don’t know how long I sat there, staring at the carpet. A rap on the door brought me back to reality.

Chris peeked in. “Your company gone?”

Before I could get a word out, a tear trickled down my face. Then another.

Chris came in and sat on the floor next to me. “This doesn’t look good. You want me to get Wei or Mom?”

I shook my head.

“Who was that guy?”

“Kasimir Lessig’s assistant.” I could barely get the words out.

“About your grandfather?”

That did it. I burst into tears. Chris took me in his arms, rocking me until I was cried out. I stayed there, my head against his chest, listening to the rise and fall of his breath, the beating of his heart.

“How can I help?” he asked softly, his arms holding me tight.

I turned my face to him, and the next thing I knew, my arms were around his neck and I was kissing him. And he was kissing me. Warmth seeped into me, and I felt myself floating somewhere outside of my head, in an ether that both surrounded and filled me with a sense of infinity and awe. Losing all sense of where I was, the unknown teemed with goodness and truth. I wanted to stay wherever I was forever. But reality intruded.

“Hey! You guys down there?” Wei called.

“Yeah.” Chris stood and helped me up. “We’ll be right there.”

At the door, he leaned down and whispered, “I’ll do anything to help you, Nina. Anything. Look, I know that you and Sal… Dammit, Nina. Do I have a chance with you?” I started to speak, but he put his finger on my lips. “Don’t answer yet. Let me think I do for at least a little while longer.”

After dinner, I got Wei alone in her room. Ignoring the major guilt I felt about kissing her brother while I was supposed to be in love with one of her best friends—who hadn’t contacted me in days—I figured life and death were more important than love. If I looked too closely, that seemed to be the story of my family’s life.

I took a deep breath, praying I wasn’t signing Pops’s death warrant. Several minutes later, I finished with, “That’s it. There is no way in hell I will betray you and your family.”

“Damn.” Wei stared at me for a good minute, before saying, “Did you tell Chris?”

“No, I wanted to tell you first. And, Wei, Brie called me earlier. She and Dorrie and Mag got the whole rescue plotted out for Joan. It’s set for Tuesday. But what are we going to do?” It was hard enough not to tell the Jenkinses about the rescue, and now this so-called deal from Lessig was making everything so much worse. “Pops—I can’t let him die. And I can’t give Lessig information about your dad. What do I do?”

“Correction. What do we do? It’s time for a meeting. A family meeting.”

“What about Dee? I can’t put her in danger.”

“Okay.” Wei pondered for a moment. “Not Dee. Let me get Mom up here. We need to tell her everything—even about Joan. Dad will go along with whatever she says.”

“And Chris?” I was already worked up, so any blushing went unnoticed.

“He’ll make his own decision. I’ll go get Mom.”

I hoped she was right. I’d already lost so much of my family. I couldn’t afford to lose them all, too.

“Nina, I respect your decision,” Mrs. Jenkins said. “A hard one to make, but I believe it is the right one.”

“Thank you.”

“I’ll get ahold of the Sisterhood about the change in plans for tomorrow,” Wei said. “Don’t worry, it will work out.”

I tracked down Dee in the kitchen, helping Chris clean up. I glanced at the cook center clock. It was nine. There was something about nine o’clock on Sunday. Skivs! The interruption with my drawings! With everything that had happened, I’d almost forgotten.

“Do you ever watch Vacation Destinations of the Ultra-Riche ?” I asked.

“I’ve been known to.” Chris smiled. “You planning on becoming ultra-rich? ’Cause you just had your Holiday vacation.”

“May I turn it on?” I asked.

“Sure. Something special going on?”

“Actually—yes.”

Wei came downstairs. “Mom’s having that conversation,” she said when everyone’s attention was on the FAV.

The wheels were in motion, and I was powerless to stop them. Might as well enjoy my artistic triumph. It could be the only one I’d ever have.

“You guys all watch this with me,” I said.

Dee, Chris, Wei, and I sat around the kitchen table watching as top-tier families traveled to the week’s themed resorts. This Sunday was tropical fantasy islands. Right in the middle of a mid-twentieth-century Hawaiian luau, the picture flickered. The next image was the first of my homeless series, with music I’d never heard before backing it.

“Nina!” Dee grabbed my arm. “Those are your pictures!”

“I know.”

Chris leaned over and whispered quietly in my ear. “You keep amazing me,” he said. “Like no one else.”

As we watched my sketches broadcast on the FAV, with the haunting music Dorrie’d chosen behind them, I wondered how amazed he’d be if he knew what I was planning.

First day back to school after Holiday, and Mr. Haldewick gave us a pop quiz. I glanced over at Wei, who was doodling with her rapido, already done with the test. Up the aisle, Mr. H scrutinized the class, most of whom were bent over their desks, writing furiously. Like Wei, I was finished, and… my life as I knew it was about to be finished. The meeting the night before hadn’t gone like I thought it would. There were things I had to do that I wasn’t sure I could do. But Lessig had given me no choice. And lives were at stake.

Then there was the whole Chris thing. How could I have kissed him like that? I’d gotten so lost in his kisses that I hadn’t wanted to find my way out. The thought of his lips on mine made my cheeks burn and my insides tingle.

Sal wasn’t in school at all today. And I hadn’t heard from him in days. I fingered the half heart dangling from my necklace. We were in love. Weren’t we? I mean, I loved him. Didn’t I? Whether or not he loved me, I wasn’t sure anymore. I didn’t love that he thought I needed protecting. I did love how it felt when he held me. I didn’t love that he was gone all the time. I had no idea what we were anymore.

I wondered if that’s how Ginnie had felt when my dad “disappeared.” She’d had to go through years of having the world believe he was dead. Seeing him only at clandestine meetings in the park, when he could get away from whatever Resistance work he was doing. Then, when she got pregnant with Dee, she’d had to… Ugh, Ed. That was the beginning of Ed. And then my dad was out of her life forever.