Anonymous - The Nunnery Tales

“To this the king shook his head doubtfully and replied that I might be telling the truth, but that he feared he could not trust me. The temptation was too strong. If I desired to have the honor of continuing in his service, he suggested I submit to castration. To this I humbly objected, replying that I was as my maker had been pleased to make me, and much as I coveted and appreciated the honor of continuing in his royal service, I considered that at my age, castration might cause death. Well, on this the king was very angry and said that he had no doubt the suspicions about me were founded on fact. Since I seemed to be unworthy of the honor of continuing in his service, I should be made a monk, and enjoy myself in the seclusion of a monastery of the strictest order. But in some things, the cowl is even stronger than the crown, and I had some friends in the church who interfered. I was placed in a monastery of exceedingly easy discipline, where there were a considerable number of young monks of good family. From them I learned that monastic life has its charms and privileges as well as those of any other life, and in fact, that was the way I became a monk.”

I had been rather curious to know how it was that a fine, handsome, strong man had adopted a line of life for which he was apparently so ill suited. Apparently, his proper sphere would have been at the head of a troop of heavy dragoons or a company of musketeers. I suggested to him that some of his penitents must have made exceedingly interesting confessions to him, and that some pleasant adventures must have occurred in consequence.

“You are right, my son,” he replied, “and according to our strict rule, I ought not to divulge any such stories. But the fact is, our rules are growing weaker and weaker day by day, and I shall not be at all surprised to find very soon that there are no more rules or convents, or nuns, or priests in existence. So, by way of concluding your education, I shall have no hesitancy in divulging whatever in my experience I have found entertaining. Only, I think in common fairness to our beautiful and accommodating companions, they should hear this as well. Good Lord!” he continued in a musing tone, “what a series of adventures that girl Emilie did relate to us! For a girl of her age, she has seen and experienced a great deal! And what a splendid young lady she is. I am glad to hear that she has been thoroughly well-fucked, both back and front, for, as you may have noticed, my son, I am rather well hung and I don't like hurting either my pretty companion, or myself.

“Adele also makes a very tidy fuck, I dare say, and I know she has acquired the art of satisfying the Superior, so she pleases somebody even if she is not big enough for me. Only, my son, if in the course of your innocent familiarity, you should happen to penetrate the precincts of her rump,” here he winked knowingly, “just inform your spiritual director, will you?” He laughed.

“And apropos to this subject, my son,” he continued, “whom do you propose to make your partner for the evening, or you bed-fellow for the night. What sort of a girl have you a fancy for? You shall have her if she is in the establishment, for my influence here is unlimited. The girls you have seen are all very pretty and sweet. But Agnes and Louise are undoubtedly sore, and will be better off sleeping alone. The Lady Abbess will want Adele. Emilie I mean to keep for myself; she has raised my lusts to a very high pitch by her spirited narrative, and I hope to fuck her in every shape and way, and in such positions as were never done either by Victor or the Vicomte de Merville!”

I replied that if my aunt wanted me again, as she had the night before, I was bound in duty and in gratitude for her hospitality to give her the benefit of my humble performances.

But the monk here interrupted me with, “Duty hah! Gratitude – bosh! Her handsome ladyship must not be too greedy. If she is, I will send for my friend, Father Ambrose, from the Franciscan Monastery closed by, and he shall serve her to her heart's content. It is not the first time that he has done so.”

“No indeed,” said I. “I have heard of her first adventure, struggling and straddling between Father Ambrose in front and your Reverence behind!”

“Ah,” said he, smacking his lips, “that was nice! How young and active and tight she was.” Then he sighed. “Yes, my son, enjoy yourself in the full bloom of your youth: Lord knows it comes to an end quickly enough and you can barely raise your cock with the urging of your own hand.”

I smiled at this and thanked him, knowing that my stay at the Convent of St. Claire would be memorable indeed. Then we adjourned to the Lady Superior's apartment, where supper – and more – awaited us.