Dorsai - Jan and I

I felt like crap. I tried to explain "Trouble, I really hope that you don't mean it when you say you think I don't love you. I really, truly do love you. It's just that if I do anything to help you have an orgasm, it means that we would be having physical contact to do it – sexual contact. Not like the anatomy lesson we had, or anything like that, but actual sexual contact.

That's something that it's real difficult to explain or have a reason for.

Because of your age and mine, it's flat-out against the law: if anything happened and people found out, the best I could hope for would be losing everything I own, and being marked as some kind of sex offender. The worst that would happen would be that I'd go to jail first – and from what I hear, guys in jail don't much care for sex offenders: I'd likely wind up being a wife to some big redneck, if I wasn't killed by someone or didn't have someone beating the living crap out of me every day."

Through her sniffles and tears, she managed to tell me "Uncle Dan, I know that already. But there's only two of us here now, and I hoped that you trusted me enough to believe that I'd never tell*anyone* about it. Besides, all the other stuff we've done had been kind of sexual, too. I mean, when I got so wet during the anatomy lesson, like you called it, wasn't that sexual? And when you got an erection – and told me that you were sexually aroused – wasn't that sexual, too?"

In a way, she was right. But I still had to try telling her "That's all true enough, Jan. But there's still the problem that taking this next step is something that we can't take back – once we've had that kind of contact or experience with each other, the way we see each other with never be the same again. Do you understand that?"

"Of course I do. Why are you talking to me like I'm stupid or something?"

"Honey, it's not that I think you're stupid. I'm just trying to make sure that you really do understand that what you're talking about is forever, and if we did that, we'd never be the same again."

"But we're not the same NOW. I mean, after you saw me in my room that time" – I didn't know she could cry and blush at the same time, but she did – "do you think I'm going to believe that things weren't different between us?"

I had to admit to myself that she was right, there. But I still wasn't ready to give in.

"Jan, you're right. When I saw you then, it really sank in for me that you were really growing up, and not the little girl that I used to carry around on my shoulders when we went to the zoo. But I'm still having trouble believing that you really understand what it is you're asking, and that you really do want help from me with that particular problem."

"Uncle Dan, sometimes you are*such* a big dummy. Don't you think I know what it is I'm asking? Even after I showed you my boobs that first time? Or after our 'anatomy lesson'? Or even the other night? Remember, it was ME that took your hand and put it on my breast! Didn't you wonder how your hand got inside my blouse? Didn't you wonder why I wasn't wearing a bra in the morning, even though I had it on the night before?" – that was one I hadn't caught at the time, but thinking back on it, she was right. "Do you really think that I would have been playing with your penis yesterday morning if I didn't really want to? Or that I would be letting you play with my boob if I didn't like it, and wanted you to?"

By this time, she had (mostly) stopped crying, and was starting to get a little pissed at me. Then she stood up, and put an end to all the discussion.

"Dammit, Uncle Dan, do you think I'd do*this*" – she pulled off her blouse to reveal a braless torso, and continued stripping as she finished with "if I wasn't SURE, and it wasn't my idea?". By the time she finished talking, she was naked as the day she was born – but a hell of a lot better looking.

"Uncle Dan, I'm not asking you to have sex with me. I just want you to help me find out what an orgasm is like, and how to have them myself. If you'll do it, I want to learn about the other things, too, the ones that don't involve actual sex." She continued to stand there in front of me, leaving me a view that was most definitely distracting. But, I expect she knew that.

"What do you mean 'the other things'?"

"I mean some of the stuff that I've read about. You know, the stuff like oral sex and masturbating each other, and like that. I want to find out what it feels like when*I* have an orgasm, and I want to know what happens when a man – like YOU – has an orgasm, too."

By this time, I was finally ready to concede that she was not only serious, but reasonably aware of what it was she was asking. But I was still hesitant – somehow, I really didn't think this would be the end of it, and I wasn't sure if I was happy or sad at the prospect.

She just stood there, looking at me, as what seemed like a million thoughts ran through my mind, and I argued with myself about what to do. Finally, though, I reached a decision.

"Okay, Trouble, I agree. But you've got to remember that this doesn't mean that we're boyfriend and girlfriend, or anything like that. It's not that I don't love you and want to do what I can to make you happy, it's just that if we start paying too much attention to each other after this, people might get suspicious – and then I'd be in trouble. Besides, I think you've probably got a couple of guys at school that you'd rather have as boyfriends, than an old fart like me!"

"I understand what you mean, and no, I don't want us to be a couple or anything. And I'm not mad or upset that you had to say that stuff – you're just saying in words what I was already thinking."

After saying that, she stepped forward, took my hands, and gently helped pull me to my feet. Once I was standing, she quietly started undressing me.

I stopped her, and suggested that she get us a blanket on the floor, so that we wouldn't get too cold. She agreed, and by the time she'd gotten it, and had it spread on the floor in front of the fireplace (where we had a small, but warm fire going), I had finished undressing, and was standing in front of her, just as nude as she was – if more obviously excited.

Jan turned to me, and after a long look at my semi-erect penis, stepped over in front of me. She pulled my hands around her waist, and then started hugging me – pressing herself tightly against me. For my part, I hugged her back, and started caressing her back, much as I'd done before – but this time, I was willing to do a little more exploring. It wasn't long before I was softly caressing her: from her sides up near her breasts, to her shoulders, back down to her firm little ass that I enjoyed caressing and squeezing, and back up to her sides. She, however, was a bit more direct: she had both hands on my ass cheeks, squeezing them, and pressing her breasts and pelvis against me. Naturally enough, I started to become more erect, and it wasn't long before she had my penis trapped between her legs, and was softly rubbing her pubic bone and mons against it. In very short order, I could feel her lubrication starting to spread across the part of my penis that she was rubbing herself against.

I gently pried her away from me, and as my now-erect penis cleared her groin, it apparently brushed against the outside of her clitoris, because I heard her make a sudden gasp. I looked down, and could clearly see the hood of her clit peeking out from the top of her cleft, and the tops of her inner lips not far below it. I was also greeted by the sight of her crinkled areolas, and very erect nipples. To my surprise, I could see that her knees were a bit wobbly, and that she had already started to develop a bit of blush on her face and across her shoulders and the tops of her breasts from her arousal. She looked at me though half-lidded eyes, clearly very excited, and willing to continue. I teased her by saying "We'd better sit down, before you fall down, don't you think?" She could only nod her agreement as I gently guided her to a seated position next to me.