Eric Courtney - The married sister

Dumbly he nodded then let out a low laugh. "Well, big sister is finally liberated."

Gail looked to check the traffic then snapped her head back to him. "Don't talk to me!"

They drove back to the apartment in utter silence, the two of them staring ahead and not looking at each other as they entered the apartment. Gail went directly to her room, slamming the door, leaving it unlocked as a gesture of defiance. She stripped quickly, took a long hot shower then toweled her body until it felt good and clean and dressed in a cotton nightgown, she stood by her bed and clicked out the light.

And listened.

No sound came from the living room except low music from the radio. She saw light coming in under the door and got into bed softly, closed her eyes and wished for sleep. Later, she was making a conscious effort to will herself to sleep. Then she prayed for sleep.

Then she lay staring up at the ceiling. Gail was going through those long night hours when there is no one to turn to. Her anguish and shame tore at her soul for long hours with only the clock ticking beside her, acting as a metronome to her agony.

Far into the night, the low music played on in the living room, punctuated only by Gail's sighs and mumbled commercials on the radio. A restlessness enveloped her. She sat up and squinted at the clock. It was two o'clock in the morning. She lay back, resigned. If HE should come through the door, she could not stop him. She was exhausted, red-eyed, yet she could imagine fucking him one more time.

The endless music and silence in the next room piqued her curiosity. She slipped out of bed, tiptoed to the door and opened it a crack. She could see Lee lying on his stomach on the couch, sound asleep.

It is part of Gail's character, part of the goodness in her that made her suddenly relax and step into the room as she had for so many years when they lived at home and she had stepped into his room, clucked her tongue and proceeded to clean up after her wild young brother. She clicked off the radio, went to a closet and got down a blanket and tenderly draped it over him, pausing to see that he had an angelic smile on his face.

She couldn't help smiling, remembering him when he was the angel of the family, when he was her wild laughing kid brother, when she used to tease him and love him so. And now, her face twisting, she realized the love was now a secret obscene thing; an attraction that she loathed and loved, gloatingly, greedily, both at once and at the same time. The more disgusted with herself she became, the more excited was her mind and her body.

Kneeling beside him, thinking of what they had done at the drive-in and what Lee had wanted her to do with all those other boys, Gail grimaced as she fought against the rising tide of her lust. Twisting her hips, she could feel the slippery moistness in her vagina and wildly she thought of undressing him, licking and sucking his prick while he was asleep and of what could have happened had she gone to the trailer, the camper? What would it have been like, she wondered, her hand stealing under her cotton nightgown and stroking the insides of her thighs as she looked down at his face. Could I do that, she wondered. Could I go in there, be naked with them? Cocks all around. Do whatever they want? Could I? She straightened up and shook her head and turned out the light.

She stood for a minute, listening to his deep regular breathing in the darkness, thinking: Could I? What would it be like? Could I? Still, it wouldn't be so different. No. I can't think like that!

She fled the room almost as if chased by some ghostly watchdog. She huddled in her bed, curling up and shivering. The thought of those six boys excited her and she tried not to admit it. She fell into a deep troubled sleep murmuring "No," and "Never," over and over.

Seven more days until Rod came home. Then it was six. Then five. And four. Three, two one. And she was wide awake, opening the drapes in the bedroom to allow the first rays of morning sunshine in and, today, Rod would finally be home.

The time had passed so fast and Gail had tried to cut down on her nightly drinking but found it impossible. To compensate, she became maniacal about cleaning the house and having everything neat and in its place. She made endless trips to the laundromat and spent hours scrubbing and polishing the floor. She sat, drinking, planning the home coming meal in her mind with endless changes. She polished what silver they had for three nights running. And tried to decide what she would do.

And, now, she stood in her nightgown, rubbing her eyes and looking at the morning sun over the city. In the year since Rod had seen her, she had changed. Her face was somehow older with the beginnings of hard lines on her cheeks and an odd look in her eyes. It seemed sad at times. Other times it seemed to smoke with a repressed emotion. A kind of masochistic smile on her lips when she looked that way.

And Rod had changed. Driving to the airport, she didn't know what to expect. Rather, she imagined they would see one another and rush into each other's arms. Or, she would see him and rush at him, that old feeling for him real when she was in his presence. Somehow, it wasn't at all like that. She had stood in the airport lobby, listening to the great whoosh of incoming planes and the rising, screaming whine of the great jets taking off and absently glanced around and saw him, Rod, standing looking at each other.

They walked towards each other slowly, each intent on the other, each knowing that the other had changed. They walked toward each other like people who had dated once years before. Gail's smile was warm and friendly "hi".

Rod stood looking down at her. His face was older, harder, thinner. Also, he seemed taller. "Hi."

"You've lost weight," she said.

"So have you." And, for the first time, he smiled, crow's feet appearing at the corners of his eyes.

"Welcome home, Rod."

"Good to be home, darling."

"Are you all right?"

"Of course I am," he scoffed. "How about yourself?"

"I'm fine now that you're here."

"Same here." He stepped forward to take her in his arms.

"Rod?" And her hand shot up, stopping him.

"What?" he asked, squinting.

Gail hesitated, opened her mouth, closed it and, as glimmers of tears danced in her eyes, she said, "I love you."

"And I love you, honey," he said as he took her in his arms and kissed her.

"Rod?"

"Yes?" he murmured, fighting for her lips.

"I need you!"

Rod gave a satisfied little laugh and hugged her tight. "And I need you too. Boy, did I miss you!"

"I mean I really need you!" she sobbed.

"Okay. I'll never go away again."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

They left the terminal arm-in-arm laughing. Rod drove home with Gail snuggled close beside him, trying not to think of what she had done in the car.

Rod insisted on carrying her into the apartment and put her down, taking off his tie and coat. "Wow. I don't believe it. Fix me a drink after a nice long kiss."

She had stepped into his arms and felt his kiss and sensed his lack of ardor. Something, a little indefinable something told her that all was not right. Fearful that she might, in some way, some reserve, give away the all consuming lust she had had for her brother, she rubbed her hips against him and brushed her thighs back and forth.

Now, it was he, who pulled away. Her first numbing fear was that, in some way, he knew about her and his brother-in-law. If Lee had told him! She stood frozen by fear, waiting for the scalding word to come out of his mouth. Incest!

Instead, he waved a hand and said, "I'm sorry, it's me. Look, a lot has happened and it was a long flight and I'm dead on my feet. How about that drink?"

She exploded in relief. "Of course! How would you like it? On the rocks with a little soda?" That was the way he used to like his drink.