Ann Mayburn - Sodom and the Phoenix

Still, she wasn’t sure if they even had a relationship to be fighting over. She’d been so full of emotion during their argument that she honestly couldn’t be clear on everything Bryan had said. Now that she was cooling down a bit, she didn’t know if she’d imagined that he’d hinted he wanted something more or if it was just her wishful thinking.

Then again, that came right back around to her original problem with their geographical differences, in addition to the fact that she really didn’t know much about him at all. So they had fantastic sex and he made her feel like the most beautiful, cherished, and desired woman in the world. That didn’t mean she was going to introduce him to her sons.

She stood and searched for her purse, her eyes now adjusted enough to the darkness that she easily found it on top of the dresser. After a few moments of digging through the pockets, she found her cell phone. Holding the cool plastic in her hands, she stared at the screen with the images of flowers eternally blooming. She had the number to the airline programmed into the phone, and knew there were flights going to and from Wisconsin at all times of the day and night. It would be easy to just change her flight plans. Yeah, it might cost her a couple hundred dollars, but that money was well worth it if it meant she didn’t have to feel like this anymore.

As the blooming flowers morphed from roses to orchids on the small screen, she found that she couldn’t make herself press the button to connect her to the airline. Part of it was because she couldn’t help feeling like a coward for running away, but another part of it was the fact that she didn’t want to lose Bryan…if he was even hers to lose.

Taking a deep breath, she closed the phone and slid it into her pocket. She switched on the small lamp next to the bed and walked over to the dresser, avoiding looking into the mirror as she looked through one of the drawers. After turning her back on her reflection, she quickly changed out of Bryan’s shirt and into one of her own, folding his into a neat square.

Before she could chicken out, she left her room and shoved her cell phone into her pocket. Nervous energy filled her as she rode the elevator to Bryan’s floor. Maybe she should have called Bryan first to let him know she was coming to drop the shirt off. Then again she wasn’t very good at talking on the phone when she was upset; she tended to freeze up and stumble over her words. No, she needed to see him face-to-face. At least then she could talk to him and hopefully find out one way or another how he felt about her.

The bing of the elevator doors opening snapped her out of her musings, and as she stepped into the hallway, her heart dropped into her stomach. There at the end of the hall stood Bryan, exchanging a hug with a beautiful, young brunette with deeply tanned skin in jean shorts and a pale blue top. He smiled at her and led her into his room without seeing Tanwen gaping at him. As his door shut, Tanwen wanted to run down there and beat on it, demand he tell her who the hell that woman was and what the hell she was doing in his room.

The elevator doors closed behind her, and she stood there, stunned that he could be so callous. They’d just made love—no, they’d had sex—in that bed mere hours ago, and he was already looking for someone else to take her place. Someone young and pretty who wouldn’t push him for more than he wanted to give. She couldn’t bear to have him open the door and face the humiliation of seeing another woman in his bed, endure his words as he told her to go away.

With a numb finger, she pushed the button for the elevator and closed her eyes against the tears that threatened. She took a deep breath and bit the inside of her cheek, hard enough that the pain cleared her mind and chased back the sorrow a bit. By the time the elevator arrived, she had her phone out and was talking with the airline. Before the doors closed, she balled up Bryan’s T-shirt and threw it against the hallway wall, wishing she could do the same with her foolish broken heart.

Two months later, Tanwen smiled up at the handsome radiologist as they walked out of the hospital elevator together. Their shift had just ended, and Vince was once again trying to convince her to grab dinner with him.

“Come on, Tanwen, just a bite to eat at the diner. Nothing fancy, just a couple of buddies from work hanging out together.”

Rolling her eyes, Tanwen plucked at her scrubs. “I’m hardly dressed for dining out.”

Vince shrugged and gave her a heated look. “You make those scrubs look good.”

She looked away, discomforted by his flirting rather than attracted. Every nurse on her floor drooled over Vince, so why didn’t her stomach fill with butterflies at the thought of having dinner with him? No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t find herself seeing him as anything other than a friend.

“Really, Vince, you should ask Beth if she wants to go.” They paused to let an elderly woman in a wheelchair pass. “I know she’s been dying for you to ask her out.”

He cocked his head and examined her closely. “I don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell with you, do I?”

A flush heated her cheeks, and she scrubbed at the floor with the tip of her shoe. “I-I’m… I think you’re a great guy, but I’m just not interested in you like that.”

She peeked up and caught the look of sadness in his expression, but he nodded. “I understand.” He took a deep breath and plastered a strained smile on his face. “So, Beth wants my hot body, huh?”

She grinned, thankful he hadn’t caused a scene. “You’ll need to ask her that.”

The nurse in question, a pretty blonde with generous hips and breasts, came out of one of the elevators behind them. Her blue eyes sparkled as she spied Vince. His voice turned thoughtful as he said, “Gotta run, Tanwen.”

She laughed softly and hitched her bag over her shoulder. By the time she reached the main doors, her laughter had fled, leaving behind the familiar empty ache. For the hundredth time, she both chastised and congratulated herself for leaving her vacation two days early.

As soon as she’d returned to her room after the humiliating scene at the elevator on Bryan’s floor, she packed her bags and checked out, spending five hours at the airport waiting for her flight to leave. She’d left a note at the front desk for Margo and Greg with her cell phone number, asking them to contact her about how Margo and the baby were doing. She’d received a call from Margo four days later, and the women had chatted about how close Margo had come to having the baby in the ambulance and how their newest bundle of joy was doing.

Margo had asked why Tanwen had left early. She’d made an excuse of one of her son’s being ill and needing her home. She felt like a bug turd for lying, but she didn’t want to tell Margo the real reason she’d left. Margo had warned her about Bryan, and it was her own fault that she’d ignored that warning. Still, she couldn’t help but wonder if things would have gone differently if she’d just agreed to stay the night with him. Would she have returned to his room after dealing with Margo? Would she be the one he’d welcomed with a hug instead of that woman?

The late-afternoon sun warmed her face as she exited the lobby, and she took a moment to close her eyes and try to let the tension of the day go. She’d been getting better at that, better at relaxing and enjoying the simple things in life. In her heart, she knew she had Bryan to partially thank for that, but she refused to admit it. Most of all, she refused to admit how much she wished she could go back in time and do things over.

Lost in her own thoughts, she jumped when a horn beeped at her as she crossed the circle in front of the hospital where patients were picked up and dropped off. Shielding her hand against the sun, she started to say she was sorry, but the words died in her throat. At that instant, a semi could have run her over and she would have scarcely noticed.