Li Yu - The Carnal Prayer Mat

Lyric:

The full story of Honest Quan's vengeance is not yet over, but the greater part of it has been told, and the rest will be given after a brief interval. Let us now take up again the merry tale of Vesperus's triumphs. We may as well let him carry his enjoyments to the limit before they come back to confound him.

That night, as he held Cloud in his arms, he learned that all three beauties were her relatives and that the two younger ones were particularly close to her. But the night was short and every moment precious because of their desire to make love, so he never did ask the women's names, their husbands' sobriquets, or where they lived. Not until his visit the next night did he make good the omission.

"The one I call Aunt," said Cloud, "was born on Flowers' Birthday and was given the name Floral Dawn. Because she is our aunt and older than we are, we can't very well use her personal name, so we call her Aunt Flora. When her husband died ten years ago, she wanted very much to remarry but was prevented from doing so by the birth of her husband's posthumous child, and so she has had to remain a widow.

"The ones I call sister are married to two brothers, nephews of Aunt Flora's. The elder girl is named Lucky Pearl, the younger one Lucky Jade. Lucky Pearl 's husband is Scholar Cloud-Reposer, Lucky Jade's Scholar Cloud-Recliner. Although all three families live in separate houses, the houses are so interconnected it is as if they shared a common gateway, where they are constantly running into one another. I'm the only one who lives apart, but even I am only a few doors away. At least we all live on the same lane. When you and I met yesterday, I thought you must have moved here on their account and then waited a full six months before calling on me, which is why I got so angry with you. How was I to know you'd had nothing to do with them?"

At this news Vesperus became even more jubilant. He recalled the Knave's telling him about two sisters from a rich and distinguished family who were married to two brothers, and the brothers' sobriquets happened to match these. Obviously, a thief's eye is like a libertine's; it misses nothing.

"Yesterday you were so kind as to promise your sisters to me," he said. "I wonder when I'll be allowed to meet them?"

"It won't be long now. In three or four days I shall have to go over and explain matters, after which I'll take you to meet them. There's just one thing I should mention, though. Once I'm over there, I shan't be coming back here again. We'll not be making love in this bed anymore."

Vesperus was astonished. "Why is that? No sooner do I move in than you move out to avoid me!"

"There's a perfectly good reason for it. If I'm over there, you can come and see me anytime, and while visiting me you can visit them too. Two birds with one stone! You've nothing to worry about."

"I simply don't understand a word you're saying. Kindly explain."

"Well, my husband, as you know, is a tutor in their husbands' family, and both men are students of his. Their writing is poor, and they're afraid of the triennial examination they will have to face as licentiates, so they've bought places in the Academy, and are about to set off for the capital. Since they can't get along without their teacher, my husband has to go too. He's worried that I'll have no one to look after me while he's away and wants me to live with their families. I shall need to move within the next few days. That's why I won't be back again. We'll just have to meet over there."

At this news Vesperus's joy was redoubled. It was as if the Heavenly powers had put themselves out to please him, sending the three husbands off on a journey and bringing their three wives together in one place where he could indulge his every erotic desire with complete license.

In a few days, as Cloud had said, the teacher and his students departed, and she at once moved into the other house.

Her move came at the height of her affair with Vesperus, and she could not bear to be parted from him for long. She knew that somehow she would have to reveal her secret if she was to get her sisters' agreement to bring him over for sex. Her motivation was seventy percent self-interest, thirty percent altruism.

"Have you ever been back to the temple to burn incense?" she asked, after exchanging a few pleasantries with her sisters.

"No, we went there only once," said Lucky Jade. "Why would we want to burn incense all the time?"

"With such a handsome man kowtowing to you, a visit every few days would hardly be too much."

"We'd like to, but we have no fans to give him, and we wouldn't want to go empty-handed."

"Stop making fun of me, sister," said Cloud. "I got nothing in return for my fan, I know that. And although you may have gotten a few bows, I never saw any sign of him following you home. All he likes to do is perform a few meaningless kowtows and get you to fall in love with him."

"You never spoke a truer word," said Lucky Jade. "We were just talking about that incident, and there's one thing we still don't understand. Why did he fade away like that after such a brave beginning? From the crazy way he carried on, you got the impression he couldn't wait until the next day but would come over that very night. We waited and waited, but there was no sign of him. If he's so heartless, why did he bother to kowtow in the first place?"

"I've heard that he spends all his time longing for you, but is frustrated because he doesn't know where to find you."

"It may not be the two of us he's longing for. I suspect he's lovesick from looking at the fan and thinking of the one who gave it to him."

"He did feel lovesick over the fan, it's true. But fortunately the sickness was not deep-rooted and has yielded to treatment, and the account has now been settled. But as for his lovesickness over the kowtowing, that is a very serious matter indeed, and will take time to cure. If he dies of it, I'm afraid you two may have to answer with your lives."

This remark struck Lucky Pearl and Lucky Jade as highly suspicious, and they peered closely at Cloud to observe her expression. She did seem to have a supercilious air about her as she talked and laughed.

"You're looking so smug," they said in unison. "Don't say you caught him and settled accounts for the fan?"

"You're not far wrong. And I did it behind your backs."

At this the sisters resembled nothing so much as two failed candidates for the provincial examinations meeting a newly successful one-a mixture of humiliation and envy.

"Well, congratulations!" they said, forcing smiles to their faces. "You've given us a new brother-in-law to be proud of! But when do we celebrate?"

This last remark carried three distinct implications: jealousy, ridicule, and the suspicion that Cloud might not have caught him, after all, but be indulging in a little leg-pulling at their expense. If so, they thought, she would surely be disconcerted when they challenged her claim.

But Cloud was not in the least abashed; if anything, she was more smug than ever. "You may not have celebrated yet, but there will certainly be a wedding reception," she said. "One day I'll give a party and invite you both."

"In that case," said Lucky Jade, "where is our new brother-in-law? Would you permit us to see him?"