Рейчел Уэллс - Alfie And George

Finally a door sprang open and a scruffy lady emerged. As she ran at me screaming, Dustbin managed to sneak into house. Great, the first part of our plan had worked!

‘Get off my chickens,’ the woman shouted; she sounded a bit like the queen. ‘Get off them!’ Yeah, as if, I thought. I chased the chickens even harder, until I was sure Dustbin was safely inside. Thankfully the woman had forgotten to shut the door too. The idea was that he would tell all the cats to come out, so there could be no doubt that this person had the missing lamppost cats. I just hoped she did have them, after all of this. It would be a bit embarrassing otherwise.

‘We’re sorry,’ Jonathan said, his voice shaky as if he was nervous, when the woman noticed them. ‘Alfie, get out of there!’ I did as he asked, hopping into the woman’s garden to stand by her feet. I noticed she was wearing one boot, but the other foot only had a holey sock on it. She didn’t exactly look dangerous, although her grey hair was wild and she wore a huge jumper over what looked like pyjamas.

‘Right, well, I’m sorry about this but if you could open the front gate, then Alfie can come with us,’ Matt said, glancing at Jonathan. He and Jonathan turned around; they were looking for the police, I guessed.

‘I will do no such thing. This cat is mine now,’ she said, looking at me. ‘Ahh, I don’t have a British Blue and you are very handsome.’ I raised my whiskers — how kind of her to notice — but then I remembered where I was and why I was there.

‘He’s our cat,’ Matt said angrily.‘Give him back!’ He stood as close as he could to the fence and Jonathan joined him.

‘Yowl,’ I said angrily.

The woman stared at me, then at Jonathan and Matt before turning around and looking at her back door.

‘Arrrghhh!’ she screamed as Dustbin emerged, followed by a horde of cats. My heart quickened as I saw George next to Dustbin.

‘Miaow,’ I said, running up to him.‘Thank goodness you’re all right.’ I nuzzled him with all my might.

‘Dad, I knew you’d come,’ George replied.

‘Right, no time for that just now, we need to stick together.’ I saw Pinkie emerge with the others; there must have been about twenty cats there! She ran over to me.

‘Thank goodness,’ she said. ‘Alfie, thank goodness you’re here.’ She looked upset. ‘I’m so relieved to be out. I really didn’t like being there, not even her fridge was a comfort to me.’

‘It’s OK, you are all free now,’ I said.

Although I realised with a sinking feeling that actually none of us were; we were still stuck in the woman’s garden.

‘You really are the cat snatcher!’ Jonathan shouted above the noise, as cats of all shapes and sizes ran around the garden, miaowing loudly.

‘I most certainly am not,’ the woman replied.

‘But you’ve got our kitten, and you’re trying to take Alfie!’ Matt said.

‘They are all mine. Mine I tell you,’ she screeched. I looked at her, worried she was deranged. As she tried to round up the cats, including me, two things happened. We heard a police siren coming closer, just as Vic and Heather Goodwin ran up to Matt and Jonathan, with Salmon at their heels. I had never been so pleased to see them. Actually before now I had never been pleased to see them, so this situation really was very odd.

‘What is going on?’ Vic shouted.

‘She’s the cat snatcher,’ Matt said.

I snuggled close to George; we didn’t know how to get out but at least I had my boy. The other cats all seemed happy to be outside as they ran around in circles, enjoying their freedom.

‘What, this old lady?’ Heather asked, incredulous.‘Citizen’s arrest!’ she shouted, although how she was going to do that from the other side of the fence I wasn’t sure.

‘I am not the cat snatcher. These are all my cats,’ the woman maintained.

‘The police are on the way,’ Matt told them.

‘Good. And that’s not true, lady.’ Vic waved a bunch of papers at the woman. ‘All these cats have been reported missing.’

‘And George is one of them,’ Jonathan said.

‘You are a cat-napper of the worst kind,’ Heather shouted.

‘But …’ The woman looked defeated.‘I just wanted them to be mine.’

The police car pulled up and two policemen got out.

‘What on earth is going on?’ one of them asked, as Vic took it upon himself to explain.

In the ensuing madness, I was able to check that George was all right. He said that Pinkie had looked after him and the other cats were all very friendly. They were all very upset to have been kitty-napped, as they thought of it. But the cat snatcher, who it turned out was called Henrietta, was kind to them, although she wouldn’t let them go out, so the house was a mess and the cats were all stir-crazy. She hadn’t been mean though, which to me was the main thing.

It transpired that she had grabbed George from Tiger’s back step in the few seconds he had been there alone. She must have been watching us. I shuddered to think that I had been so careless.

‘Let us in,’ one policeman said.

‘I’d rather not,’ the lady replied uncertainly.

‘Either let us in or we will have to force our way in, and you’re in enough trouble as it is.’

As the police eventually gained entry, with Matt and Jonathan alongside them, Vic and Heather also barged in. They were doing their best to tell the bemused policemen what to do.

‘You should arrest her,’Vic said.

‘Lock her up and throw away the key,’ Heather concurred.

‘Well, perhaps first we should sort out what to do with all these cats. It’s not like we can take them to the station,’ one of the policemen said, looking slightly afraid.

‘No need,’ said Heather. ‘We can call all the owners and they’ll come and collect them. Look, I’ve got the posters. We took a copy of each so we knew what cats to look out for. We don’t run the neighbourhood watch for nothing, you know.’

‘Well that is good, Mr and Mrs Goodwin. Right, Ms …’

‘Babbington-Smythe. But you can call me Henrietta,’ the strange lady said. She even held out her hand to the officer, who looked confused but shook it.

‘Come with me,’ said one of the policemen.‘I’m afraid I’ll have to ask you to wait inside while we sort this out.’ The other policeman used his radio to inform someone that they had a cat situation which may take a while. As Matt scooped up George, Jonathan phoned Claire to tell her what was going on and I managed to get a quiet moment with Dustbin and Mr B.

‘I don’t know how to thank you, Mr B, you did a sterling job. And, Dustbin, you proved, yet again, what a great friend you are. None of these cats would be free without you.’

‘I dunno about that, Alfie, but I’m just glad the boy is all right,’ said Dustbin. ‘The other cats too, of course, but especially him.’ We nuzzled.‘And, Alfie, it took real guts to do what you did, that fence, your fear of heights, the hens. Good job.’

‘I’m sorry to interrupt, but I must get back, you never know when I’ll be needed next,’ Mr B said. They both managed to get away without anyone noticing or trying to rehome them, thankfully.

After what seemed like ages with the policeman, we were allowed to go. Heather and Vic agreed to wait for the other cat owners, only to help the police, of course. As I gave Salmon a grin, I realised the Goodwins were in their element. They were loving every minute, although possibly disappointed they didn’t get to make a citizen’s arrest.

As we made our way home, Matt carrying George, Jonathan carrying me, I realised that this plan had worked pretty well. No one was hurt, I hadn’t got more than a couple of scratches from the fence, no chickens had been harmed, and I had George safe and sound with me.