Рейчел Уэллс - A Friend Called Alfie

‘Welcome to my house, Snowball,’ Harold said, picking her up and stroking her. George’s eyes widened and then he looked at me. The pilchard finally dropped.

‘It was a bit heartbreaking,’ Jonathan said. ‘They are really going to miss her but at least they know she’s going to a good home and of course a familiar street with friends,’ he added. ‘With Alfie. They were so pleased that these two were being reunited,’ he added. And I would be too, if it wasn’t for George.

‘Oh Snowball, please don’t be sad, we’ll be great company for each other and you have your old friend Alfie here too,’ Harold said, petting her. She snuggled into him. I guess she had accepted the move with her usual grace.

‘Snowball’s family, Tim and Karen Snell, are moving overseas,’ Claire explained. Although to who I wasn’t sure, it seemed only George and I were in the dark on this one. ‘And it wasn’t suitable for her to go with them, so when they told me and I mentioned that we were looking for a cat, it all fell into place.’

‘I still can’t believe you told them we were looking for a cat the exact time they were looking for a family for Snowball,’ Marcus said. ‘It’s like it was fate,’ he added.

‘That’s what I said,’ Claire said, excitedly. ‘Snowball and Alfie were inseparable before they moved away, he was so devastated when she left,’ she added. George did not look best pleased.

‘And I’m very pleased to meet you,’ Harold said. ‘You really are gorgeous.’ He sounded delighted, but I was still trying to process all the information, and there was so much to figure out. Snowball seemed a little less shocked than me, but when Jonathan and Matt turned up she would have known what was going on, and her family had probably explained it to her, but I had a feeling she’d miss them. She had lived with them since she was a kitten and that broke my heart. However, it seemed that their loss was our gain.

I had a million questions but seeing the thunderous look on George’s face, I realised he had too.

Snowball and I were trying not to look at each other. George was ignoring me. The humans were all making a massive fuss of Snowball and all I wanted to do was to speak to her alone.

‘We’ve even got a cat flap for you,’ Harold said, ‘so you can come and go as you please.’ He was clearly smitten but then Snowball had that effect on people, and cats actually. I tried to get George’s attention – he was sulking under a chair, clearly not himself.

I took a breath. I needed to speak to Snowball, I needed to know what happened and if she was alright. I couldn’t tell from her impenetrable gaze which she had trained on Harold right now. I also needed to talk to George, because of all the questions I was sure he wanted to ask. But at the moment we were stuck here, in the most awkward welcome party known to cats.

It felt so strange, all those years apart and I could still read her. It was, in some ways, like she’d never been away. My unwarranted fear of being given to Harold was replaced with a new fear. And that was that George would never accept Snowball. Claire said to Jonathan that she was surprised by our reactions, she thought we’d both be so happy to see each other, but of course I couldn’t explain that to her. How could I expect a human to understand the complexities of a cat relationship?

George and I broke away from the others on the way home and went to the park at the end of Edgar Road.

‘How are you feeling?’ I asked, accepting how inadequate my words were. We were crouched behind a bush together, George was angrily swiping at leaves.

‘I don’t know,’ George said sadly. ‘They said Snowball was your girlfriend?’

‘I know and, George, I was just as shocked as you were to see her,’ I said.

‘But, Dad, she can’t replace Tiger,’ he said. I supposed I should be grateful for him getting straight to the point.

‘Of course not, George, and you can’t think of her like that. We were together before Tiger and I were, when your mum and I were just friends, but I don’t want you to worry about that. We haven’t even had the chance to say hello properly yet,’ I pointed out.

‘I was excited for Harold to get a cat and I thought we’d all be best friends but now I don’t know how I can be friends with her, it feels like I would be betraying Tiger mum,’ he said. He looked pretty forlorn.

‘And I understand that. You must feel incredibly confused, and I know I do too. But Snowball is here because she lost her family, or was about to lose them, and because we persuaded our families that Harold needed a cat. We need to remember that.’

‘But, I can’t ignore the fact that she and you have history, and that makes me feel funny,’ he said.

‘I understand, George, I do, but I don’t have the first clue what to say to you. Snowball will never replace Tiger in my heart. I need you to know that. We’re different cats now, we’re older and hopefully wiser …’ While I was trying to reassure George, I was also trying to reassure myself, or at least organise my emotions.

‘But you might love her like you used to.’

‘I honestly don’t know how to answer that at the moment. George, please understand me when I say that I won’t do anything to hurt you and I would never ever do anything to tarnish my feelings for Tiger.’

‘I hope that’s true and I hope you know that I am going to have to tell Snowball that she can never be my mum.’ He was getting riled now.

‘You don’t need to say that because she never would try to do anything like that. George, remember when Oliver moved into the Barkers’ house, and I felt funny about that? You said that the Barkers needed him because they were lost without Tiger and mentioned that Oliver needed a home. Well Harold needs Snowball and Snowball needs Harold by the sounds of it and if you can be friends with Oliver, then you can be friends with Snowball surely.’

‘No, because Oliver was never your girlfriend, and didn’t try to replace my mum. Anyway I can’t talk about this anymore right now, I’m going to go and see Hana.’

There was nothing I could do as I watched him stalk off.

My heart felt heavy as I went home. I thought about going back to see Snowball but then I realised I needed a bit of time alone.

I crept into the house and into my bed. I fell asleep and tried not to think but after about only forty blinks, I woke up, everything felt unsettled. I decided that it was time to bite the bullet, because I wouldn’t settle until I had a proper chat with Snowball. I needed to know she was alright. So I made my way back to Harold’s house, hoping George was happily with Hana and didn’t get mad at me if he found out. I had no idea how to do the right thing. Firstly I had to worry about George’s feelings, then Snowball’s and finally my own.

I let myself in the cat flap and found Snowball in the living room sitting on Harold’s lap. He was asleep. It was strange, seeing her evoked myriad emotions. In some ways they looked as if they belonged together and had been together for years, they seemed so comfortable. Yet, also I couldn’t help but remember how much pain I had been in when I said goodbye to her years ago, and how much had happened since. I’d become a father – albeit initially reluctantly – I’d fallen in love with Tiger, I’d been on holiday a number of times, we’d met Harold, there was almost a whole life between when I last saw her and now. And I was a very different cat from the one who tried to woo her by climbing a tree with dug up flowers. That had ended in me getting rescued by the fire brigade and was so humiliating, by the way. I would never do that now! Especially as that was how I discovered my fear of heights.

Snowball peered at me and I thought ‘I still know you.’ It was in her eyes. I tilted my head and hoped that she would follow me as I made my way to the back door.