Eoin Colfer - Artemis Fowl - The Eternity Code

‘Cube, are we gonna have to raid the video room on our way out?’

‘It ain’t gonna happen,’ said Foaly, the method actor. ‘I wiped your patterns from the video.’

Artemis was suspended by the armpits between Pex and Chips.

‘Traitor,’ he muttered. ‘I gave you life, Cube. I am your creator.’

‘Yeah, well, maybe you made me too much like you, Fowl, aurum potestas est. Gold is power. I’m just doing what you taught me.’

Spiro patted the Cube fondly. ‘I love this guy. He’s like the brother I never had.’

‘I thought you had a brother?’ said Chips, puzzled, which was not unusual for him.

‘OK,’ said Spiro. ‘He’s like a brother I actually like.’

The Phonetix server was located in the centre of the lab. A monolithic hard drive, with python-like cables rippling out to various workstations.

Spiro undipped his new best friend from his belt.

‘Where do you need to be, Cube?’

‘Just pop me down on the lid of the server, and my omni-sensor will do the rest.’

Spiro complied and, in seconds, schematics were flickering across the C Cube’s tiny screen.

‘I have them,’ crowed Spiro, his hands two fists of triumph. ‘That’s the last snide e-mail with stock prices I get from these guys.’

‘Download complete,’ said Foaly smugly. ‘We have every Phonetix project for the next decade.’

Spiro cradled the Cube against his chest.

‘Beautiful. I can launch our version of the Phonetix phone before they do, make myself a few extra million before I release the Cube.’

Arno’s attention was focused on the security monitors.

‘Eh, Mister Spiro. I think we have a situation here.’

‘A situation?’ growled Spiro. ‘What does that mean? You’re not a soldier any more, Blunt. Speak English.’

The New Zealander tapped a screen as if that would change what he was seeing.

‘I mean, we have a problem. A big problem.’

Spiro grabbed Artemis by the shoulders.

‘What have you done, Fowl? Is this some kind of. .?’

The accusation died before it could be completed. Spiro had noticed something.

‘Your eyes. What’s wrong with your eyes? They don’t match.’

Artemis treated him to his best vampire smile.

‘All the better to see you with, Spiro.’

In the Phonetix lobby, the sleeping security guard suddenly regained her senses. It was Juliet. She peeped out from under the brim of a borrowed cap to make sure Spiro had not left anyone in the corridor.

Following Artemis’s capture in Spiro’s vault, Holly had flown them both to Phonetix to initiate Plan B.

Of course, there had been no sleeping gas. For that matter there had only been two guards. One was taking a restroom break and the other was doing the rounds of the upper floors. Still, Spiro wasn’t to know that. He was busy watching Foaly’s family of sim security snoring all over the building, thanks to a video clip on the Phonetix system.

Juliet lifted the desk phone and dialled three numbers.

9. . 1. . 1

Spiro reached two fingers delicately into Artemis’s eye, plucking out the iris-cam. He studied it closely, noting the microcircuitry on the concave side.

‘This is electronic,’ he whispered. ‘Amazing. What is it?’

Artemis blinked a tear from his eye. ‘It’s nothing. It was never here. Just as I was never here.’

Spiro’s face twisted in sheer hatred. ‘You were here all right, Fowl, and you’ll never leave here.’

Blunt tapped his employer on the shoulder. An act of unforgivable familiarity.

‘Boss, Mister Spiro. You really need to see this.’

Juliet stripped off her Phonetix Security jacket. Underneath she wore a Chicago PD SWAT uniform. Things could get hairy in the R&D Lab, and it was her job to make sure that Artemis did not get hurt. She hid behind a pillar in the lobby and waited for the sirens.

Spiro stared at the lab’s security monitors. The pictures had changed. There were no more guards slumbering around the facility.

Instead, the screens played a tape of Spiro and his cronies breaking into Phonetix. With one crucial difference: there was no trace of Artemis on the screen.

‘What’s happening, Cube?’ spluttered Spiro. ‘You said that we’d all be wiped from the tapes.’

‘I lied. It must be the criminal personality I’m developing.’

Spiro smashed the Cube against the floor. It remained intact.

‘Tough polymer,’ said Artemis, picking up the microcomputer.

‘Almost unbreakable.’

‘Unlike you,’ retorted Spiro.

Artemis looked like a doll between Pex and Chips. ‘Don’t you understand yet? You’re all on tape. The Cube was working for me.’

‘Big deal. So we’re on tape. All I have to do is pay the security booth a visit and take the recordings.’

‘It’s not going to be that simple.’

Spiro still believed that there was a way out.

‘And why not? Who’s gonna stop me? Little old you?’

Artemis pointed to the screens. ‘No. Little old them.’

The Chicago PD brought everything they had, and a few things they had to borrow. Phonetix was the city’s biggest single employer, not to mention one of the top five subscribers to the Police Benevolent Fund.

When the 911 call came in the duty sergeant put out a citywide summons.

In less than five minutes there were twenty uniforms and a full SWAT team beating on the Phonetix doors. Two choppers hovered overhead and eight snipers lined the roofs of the adjacent buildings. No one was leaving the area, unless they were invisible.

The Phonetix security guard had returned from his rounds and just noticed the intruders on the monitors. Shortly after that he noticed a group of Chicago PD uniforms tapping the door with their gun barrels.

He buzzed them in. ‘I was just about to call you guys,’ he said.

‘There’s a buncha intruders in the vault. They musta tunnelled in or somethin’, ‘cause they didn’t come past me.’

The security guard on a restroom break was even more surprised.

He was just finishing off the sports section of the Herald Tribune when two very serious-looking men in body armour burst into the cubicle.

‘ID?’ growled one, who apparently did not have the time for full sentences.

The security guard held up his laminated card with a shaking hand.

‘Stay put, sir,’ advised the other police officer. He didn’t have to say it twice.

Juliet slipped out from behind the pillar, joining the ranks of the SWAT team. She pointed her gun and roared with the best of them, and was instantly assimilated into the group. Their assault was cut short by a tiny problem. There was only one access-point to the lab. The lift shaft.

Two officers prised open the lift door with crowbars.

‘Here’s our dilemma,’ said one. ‘We cut the power, then we can’t get the lift up here. If we call the lift up here first, then we tip off our intruders.’

Juliet shouldered herself to the front of the group.

‘Excuse me, sir. Let me go down on the cables. I blow the doors and you cut the power.’

The commander did not even consider it. ‘No. Too dangerous. The intruders would have plenty of time to put a hundred rounds into the lift.

Who are you anyway?’

Juliet took a small gripper from her belt. She clipped it on to the lift cable and hopped into the shaft.

‘I’m new,’ she said, disappearing into the blackness.

In the laboratory, Spiro and Co. were hypnotized by the monitors.

Foaly had allowed the screens to show what was actually happening on the upper levels.

‘SWAT,’ said Blunt. ‘Helicopters. Heavy armament. How did this happen?’

Spiro smacked his own forehead repeatedly.