Tess Gerritsen - Die Again

“It’s you,” says Johnny. “You’re the one doing this.”

Richard takes another step toward him. “I’m the one who’ll stop you.”

“Richard,” I plead. “Don’t do this.”

“It’s time to choose sides, Millie.”

“There are no sides! We have to talk about this. We have to be rational.”

Richard takes another step toward Johnny. It’s a dare, a contest of nerves. The bush has stripped him of reason, and he’s acting on raw fury now, at Johnny his rival. At me, the traitor. Time slows down and I register every detail with painful clarity. The sweat on Johnny’s brow. The snap of the twig under Richard’s boot as he rocks forward. Johnny’s hand, his muscles twitching taut, preparing to fire.

And I see Keiko—small, frail Keiko—as she slips silently behind Johnny. I see her raise her arms. I see the rock slam into the back of Johnny’s head.

HE IS STILL ALIVE.

Minutes after the blow, his eyes flicker open. The rock sliced open his scalp, and he’s shed an alarming amount of blood, but the look he gives us is clear-eyed and fully aware.

“You’re making a mistake, all of you,” he says. “You have to listen to me.”

“No one’s listening to you,” says Richard. His shadow moves across Johnny, and he stands staring down at him. He’s the one with the rifle now, the one in control.

Groaning, Johnny tries to rise, but it’s a struggle for him just to sit up. “Without me, you’re not going to make it.”

Richard looks at the others, who stand in a circle around Johnny. “Shall we take a vote?”

Vivian shakes her head. “I don’t trust him.”

“Then what are we going to do with him?” says Elliot.

“Tie him up. That’s what.” Richard nods to the blondes. “Go find some rope.”

“No. No .” Johnny staggers to his feet. Even though he’s swaying, he’s still too intimidating for anyone to tackle. “Shoot me if you want, Richard. Right here, right now. But I won’t be tied up. I won’t be left helpless. Not out here.”

“Go on, tie him up!” Richard snaps at the blondes, but they stand frozen. “Elliot, you do it!”

“Just try it,” Johnny growls.

Elliot blanches and backs away.

Turning to Richard, Johnny says: “So you’ve got the gun now, hey? Proved you’re the alpha male. Was that the whole point of the game?”

“Game?” Elliot shakes his head. “No, we’re all just trying to stay the fuck alive .”

“Then don’t trust him ,” says Johnny.

Richard’s hands tighten on the rifle. Oh God, he’s going to fire it. He’s going to kill an unarmed man in cold blood. I lunge for the barrel to yank it downward.

Richard’s slap sends me sprawling. “You want to get us killed, Millie?” he screams. “Is that what you’re trying to do?”

I touch my throbbing cheek. Never before has he hit me; if this were anywhere else, I’d be on the phone to the police, but out here there’s no escape, no authority to call. When I look around at the others, I see no sympathy in their faces. The blondes, Keiko, Elliot—they all side with Richard.

“All right,” says Johnny. “You have the firepower, Richard. You can use it anytime. But if you’re going to shoot me, you’ll have to do it in the back.” He turns and starts to walk away.

“If you come back to camp, I’ll kill you!” yells Richard.

Johnny calls over his shoulder: “I’d rather take my chances in the bush.”

“We’ll keep watch! If we see you anywhere near us—”

“You won’t. I’d as soon trust the animals.” Johnny pauses, looks back at me. “Come with me, Millie. Please , come.”

I glance back and forth between Richard and Johnny, paralyzed by the choice.

“No, stay with us,” says Vivian. “There’ll be a plane looking for us any day.”

“By the time the plane comes back, you’ll be dead,” says Johnny. He holds his hand out to me. “I’ll take care of you, I swear it. I won’t let anything happen. I’m begging you to trust me, Millie.”

“Don’t be crazy,” says Elliot. “You can’t believe him.”

I think of everything that’s gone wrong: Clarence and Isao, their flesh ripped from their bones. The truck, suddenly and mysteriously out of commission. The viper in Elliot’s newly slashed tent. I remember what Johnny revealed only a few days ago, about how he’d collected snakes as a boy. Who else but Johnny knows how to catch and handle a pit viper? None of what’s happened has been merely bad luck; no, we were meant to die out here, and only Johnny could execute such a plan.

He can read the decision in my eyes, and he reacts with a look of pain, as if I have delivered a mortal blow. For a moment he stands defeated, his shoulders slumped, his face a mask of sorrow. “I would have done anything for you,” he says to me softly. Then, with a shake of his head, he turns and strides away.

We are all still watching as he vanishes into the bush.

“DO YOU THINK HE’LL come back?” says Vivian.

Richard pats the rifle lying beside him, the rifle that’s now never out of his reach. “If he tries, I’ll be ready for him.”

We’re sitting around the campfire, which Elliot has built into a raging inferno against the darkness. The flames are too high and too hot for comfort, and a foolish waste of firewood, but I understand why he felt compelled to feed it so extravagantly. Those flames hold off the predators that even now are watching us. We’ve spotted no other campfires, so where is Johnny on this black, black night? What tricks does he have to stay alive when teeth and claws are everywhere?

“We’ll keep watch in pairs,” says Richard. “No one should be out here alone at any time. Elliot and Vivian will take the first watch. Sylvia and I will take the second. That will get us through the night. We keep this up, keep our wits about us, and we’ll be fine until the plane comes looking for us.”

That he’s left me out of the watch schedule is painfully obvious. I understand why Keiko’s not expected to contribute; after her startling takedown of Johnny, she’s retreated once again into silence. At least she’s eating now, a few spoonfuls of tinned beans and a handful of crackers. But here I am, able-bodied and ready to help, and no one even glances my way.

“What about me?” I ask. “What should I do?”

“We’ll handle this, Millie. You don’t need to do a thing.” The tone of his voice allows no protest, certainly not from the woman who once dared to take Johnny’s side. Without a word, I leave the fire and slink into our tent. Tonight I’m back with Richard because Keiko doesn’t want me in her tent anymore. I’m the pariah, the traitor who might stab you while you’re sleeping.

When Richard crawls in beside me an hour later, I’m still awake.

“It’s over between us,” I say.

He doesn’t bother to argue. “Yes. Obviously.”

“So which one are you going to choose? Sylvia or Vivian?”

“Does it matter?”

“No, I guess not. Whatever her name, it all boils down to screwing someone new.”

“What about you and Johnny? Admit it, you were ready to leave me and join him .”

I turn to Richard, but all I see is his silhouette, framed by the glow of firelight through canvas. “I stayed, didn’t I?”

“Only because we control the gun.”

“And that makes you the winner, does it? King of the bush?”

“I’m fighting for our fucking lives . The others understand that. Why can’t you?”

My breath comes out in a long, sad sigh. “I do understand, Richard. I know you think you’re doing the right thing. Even if you have no clue what to do next.”