Stuart Woods - Short Straw

As he did, a police car rolled slowly around a corner and toward the border crossing. Another patrol car was already parked next to the line of pedestrians, with two officers inside, watching them shuffle past.

Vittorio was glad he had the.45 Colt on his belt, and then he wasn't glad. He wasn't going to get into a shoot-out among all these people, and neither was he going to attempt to carry the pistol across the border; he had to get rid of it.

The second police car came to a stop next to the first, and Vittorio could see his friend, the police captain, sitting in the rear seat, less than twenty feet from where Barbara, then Cupie, would pass him.

Vittorio had to do something now.

VITTORIO PICKED UP HIS BAG AND WALKED STRAIGHT toward the police car, moving to put himself between the police captain and Barbara. He wanted her for himself.

The captain leaned toward his open car window. "Senor Vittorio," the policeman said, smiling broadly and displaying his gold teeth. "You are leaving us?"

"Yes, capitan," Vittorio replied, putting down his bag and placing his left hand on top of the car, bracing himself as he bent down to talk.

"I see you have reunited with your friend Senor Dalton," the policeman said, nodding toward the line.

"Where?" Vittorio asked turning to look at the line, but still keeping himself between the captain and Barbara. "Oh, yes, there he is. Perhaps I'll buy him a drink on the other side." The line was moving more quickly now. "Capitan, I wonder if you might accept a small gift?"

The captain smiled again. "I would not be so rude as to refuse your generosity, Senor Vittorio."

Vittorio pulled back his jacket to reveal the.45 in its holster. He removed it, popped the magazine, handed it to the captain, then locked the slide back and inspected the pistol to be sure it was unloaded, then handed it to the captain.

The broad smile continued. "It is a very beautiful weapon, Senor Vittorio," he said, slapping the magazine home, releasing the slide and thumbing back the safety. "I am most grateful."

Vittorio unbuckled his belt and handed over the holster, as well.

"And surely there must be something I can do for you, Senor Vittorio," the captain said, being well informed in the business of tit for tat.

Vittorio decided to surprise him. "Nothing, capitan. Perhaps some other day when I am back in Mexico you will remember me."

"How could I forget after so generous a gift," the captain replied, offering his card. "Here are all my numbers; please do not hesitate to call on me at any time you are in my country." He offered his hand.

Vittorio shook it, then glanced over his shoulder. Barbara was speaking to the American border patrol officer, and Cupie was half a dozen people behind her. "I hope to see you again soon, capitan," he said. "And now I think I'll catch up to Senor Dalton and buy him that drink in El Norte."

"Vaya con Dios," the captain said, giving him a little wave.

"And you, capitan," Vittorio replied. He picked up his bag, turned, and walked toward Cupie, still keeping himself between the policeman and Barbara, who was putting her passport back into her handbag.

Cupie spotted him. "Well, hello, Vittorio," he said. "Somehow, after I found your bag gone from the car, I expected you might turn up."

Vittorio shook his hand and glanced at Barbara. "Oh, I couldn't let her get away."

"What happened on the ferry?" Cupie said. "For a while, I thought you were a goner. When I couldn't find you aboard, I went to the captain, and he started a search of the ferry and radioed the coast guard."

"I was picked up by a fishing boat," Vittorio replied, staring at Barbara. Suddenly she turned and their eyes locked for a moment. She grabbed the handle of her suitcase and walked quickly into the United States.

"I want her," Vittorio said.

"What happened on the ferry?" Cupie asked again.

"She did her very best to murder me," Vittorio replied. He waited impatiently while the line moved forward, then he presented his passport to the border patrolman.

"You are a citizen of the United States?" the man asked.

"Native born," Vittorio replied.

"What was the purpose of your visit to Mexico?"

"Business and pleasure."

"Are you carrying any firearms?"

"No, sir."

"Did you purchase any gifts for people at home?"

"No, sir."

The patrolman handed him back his passport. "Welcome home."

Vittorio took the passport and hurried across the border, just in time to see Barbara get into a taxi and pull away. Vittorio cursed; the taxi stand was empty; she had taken the last cab.

Cupie hurried up to him. "What are you going to do?"

"Find her," Vittorio said. "Just as soon as I can get a taxi. She was giving me a blow job, and she grabbed the bottom of my trousers and tossed me over the rail. She knew I didn't swim."

"Well, Vittorio," Cupie said, "I don't think I'll want to be there when you two meet again. I'll bid you good-bye." The two men shook hands. "Maybe we'll work together again sometime."

"That would be my pleasure, Cupie," Vittorio replied, then watched the older man walk away toward a bar, towing his suitcase. He looked back toward the taxi stand in time to see two cabs pull into it and discharge passengers, and he ran for the first one.

EAGLE LAY NAKED in bed, Susannah's head on his shoulder. They were both panting and sweating copiously. "That was wonderful," he said.

"It was better than that," Susannah replied. "But at least I was able to begin to repay you for all your kindnesses."

"You mean there's more to come?"

"Oh, yes."

"I'm not sure if my health can stand it," Eagle said.

"You're pretty healthy."

The phone rang, and Eagle jerked reflexively toward it, then sank back onto his pillow. "Fuck 'em," he said, "whoever they are."

"No," she said, "fuck me."

"You're going to have to give me a few minutes," he said.

"Oh, all right, a few minutes."

The answering machine clicked on, and a voice said, "Mr. Eagle, it's Cupie. If you're there, please pick up."

"Excuse me," Eagle said to the woman on his shoulder, "but I really have to get that."

"Go ahead," she said.

Eagle picked up the phone. "Cupie? Where are you?"

"In San Diego," Cupie said. "I crossed the border right after Barbara, but she got the only cab available and lost me."

"I've been trying to reach you. What happened?"

"Lots and lots," Cupie said. "Barbara was being chased by the Mexican cops, because of an incident with a knife a few years back. The victim was the nephew of a police captain. She asked Vittorio and me to get her back to the States, and since I didn't think you wanted her dead, we helped her. On the ferry across the Gulf of California, she took the opportunity to shove Vittorio overboard; she knew he couldn't swim. I thought we had lost him, but he was picked up by a fishing boat and caught up with us at the border. He's after her now; when he finds her, it isn't going to be pretty."

"Swell," Eagle said. "When he finds her, I hope the authorities don't think I hired him to kill her."

"You're okay on that point," Cupie said. "I can testify what the arrangement was and why Vittorio went after her. I'm sorry it took so long to call you, but my cell phone disappeared-I suspect Barbara. I'm calling from a bar."

"Where are you headed now?"

"Home. I'm exhausted, and I have no idea where Barbara went, so I can't chase her any more. If you hear where she is, I'll go after her again."

"I got the papers I thought I wanted, but they were blank. Why?"

"Blank? Vittorio got her to sign them, and I watched him FedEx them to you. I guess Barbara must have…"

"Yeah, I guess she did. Go home and rest, Cupie, and send me your expenses. I'll call you if I need you."