Jonathan Kellerman - Self-Defence

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Dr Alex Delaware doesn't see many private patients any more, but for a young woman called Lucy Lowell he's prepared to make an exception. Referred to him by the police detective Milo Sturgis, Lucy had been a juror at the harrowing trial of a serial killer, and having survived that trauma is now being subjected to further emotional stress: a recurrent nightmare of a young child in a forest at night, watching something as furtive as it is disturbing.
Now Lucy's dream is starting to disrupt her waking life, and Alex believes the power of the dream and its grip on her emotions may be a repressed childhood memory of something very real.

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"You didn't find his wanting to meet that late strange?"

"I found lots of things strange. He was strange, always yakking; most of the time he made no sense. The party was strange. He wanted to give us money, I didn't argue."

"Did he come alone?"

Nod. "He was waiting when we got there, sitting in his car."

"What kind of car?"

"A Mercedes, I think. I told you I'm not into cars."

"Just a casual midnight meeting to pick up some money."

"It would have had to be late because Tom and I were working at the restaurant. Some people have to earn a living. "

"What happened after you got there?"

"He stayed in the car, told us we'd done a great job at the party and he was giving us a bonus."

Twisting her fingers.

"What else?"

"He said there was something else we needed to talk about. He wasn't sure, but he thought one of the girls who'd worked for us had gotten into some kind of fight with a guest and had walked off."

"Did he name Karen?"

"He called her the pretty one."

"Did he say which guest?"

"No."

"You're sure."

"Yes!"

"Did he mean a physical fight?"

"I assumed he meant just an argument- he might have even said "argument,' I can't remember."

Moisture in her eyes. She stared at me, flaunting the tears.

"What else?"

"Nothing, he just said the girl hadn't behaved properly, had really stepped out of line, but he wouldn't hold it against us or complain because, other than that, we'd done a really good job. Then he said we also had to promise not to say anything about the fight. Because the press was out to get him, and any scandal would cause a giant hassle for him. Even if the girl disappeared and people came asking for her. Because when she'd cursed out the guest, she'd said something about being disgusted and splitting town."

"Did that sound like Karen? Cursing?"

She shrugged and dried her eyes. "I didn't know her all that well."

"At the Dollar did she ever have problems losing her temper with customers?"

"No, just getting orders wrong. But the party was different- lots of pressure."

"So supposedly she pulled a fit, left the party, and said she was splitting town."

"That's what he said."

"Did you believe him?"

"We didn't think about it one way or the other."

"Then he gave you the money."

"Our bonus."

"How big of a bonus?"

She looked at Travis, then down at the desk. "Five," she said, very softly.

"Five what?"

"Thousand."

"A five-thousand-dollar bonus?"

"The catering bill must have been fifty, sixty thousand. It was like a tip."

"Cash?"

Nod.

"In a suitcase?"

"A paper bag- big one, like from a supermarket."

"Five-thousand-dollar tip in a bag."

"It wasn't all for us. He told us to distribute it to the others."

"What others?"

"The other servers."

"The people from the Sand Dollar?"

"That's right."

"Names."

"A guy named Lenny-"

"Lenny Korcik?"

Nod. "And Doris and two other women, Mary and Sue."

"Mary Andreas and Sue Billings."

"If you know, why are you asking?"

"Korcik's dead and Doris lives in Ventura," I said. "Where are Mary and Sue?"

"I don't know. Both were temps- hippies. I think they hitchhiked into town together. They stuck around maybe another month or two, then split, no notice."

"Together?"

"I think Sue ran off with a truck driver who came into the restaurant, and a couple days later Mary joined up with some surfers driving up the coast. Or maybe it was down the coast, I don't remember. We weren't close or anything. They were hippies."

"But you split the money with them."

"Sure, they worked."

"Even split?"

Long inhalation. "No, why should we? I contracted the whole thing. And Tom and I ended up doing all the cleanup."

"How much did you give them?"

She mumbled something.

"What's that?"

"Two-fifty."

"Two-fifty for each of them?"

Nod.

"Leaving four thousand for you and Tom."

"They didn't complain. They were happy to get anything."

"Doris, too?"

"Why not?"

"She doesn't seem like a very happy person."

"You'd have to ask her about that."

"We will, once we find her. Where did Tom take her, two nights ago?"

She wrung her hands and let loose a stream of filthy words. Cursing Sherrell Best for spying on her.

"Where?" I said.

"She needed a ride to the airport, so he took her."

"Vacation for her, too?"

She didn't answer.

"Gwen," I said wearily, "if you want to talk, fine. If not, you're on your own."

"Give me a chance," she said. "This is hard, remembering all this stuff… Okay, she decided to split town. She got nervous after you came asking around. She thought you were Best's son- we all did. Raking things up again. She didn't want the hassle."

"Nervous about her role in the cover-up."

"It wasn't like that. Like I said, there was no big plot. We just…"

"You just what?"

"Kept our mouths shut. Can't catch any flies that way."

Bitter smile.

"Did Doris see something the rest of you didn't?"

"Maybe- okay, okay, but it's not any big deal. She wasn't even sure herself. It was probably nothing."

Another tug at the bodice.

"What did she see, Gwen?"

"It was- she put the kids to sleep, left to get a drink. When she got back, one of the kids was gone and the door to the outside was open. She went out looking, finally found the kid wandering around in back; there were a lot of trees, paths. And all these other cabins. Like a big summer camp- it used to be a nudist colony. The kid was spaced out. When Doris picked her up, she started babbling. About bad men, monsters, hurting a girl, something like that. Doris figured she was having a bad dream and took her back. But when she put her in bed, the kid started screaming, woke up the other kid, and got that one crying too. Doris said it was a real hassle, they were really making noise. But with all the music from the party, you couldn't hear it. Finally got them both quiet."

"What made her suspect the kid might have really seen something?"

"When Karen didn't show up and I told her the same story I told the others."

"What was that?"

"That she hated her father and he was coming out to bring her back home, so she was going to split town."

"The others believed it, but Doris didn't?"

"She said Karen had told her she liked her father."

"Did Doris tell the others that?"

Headshake. "Lenny was into plants, real stupid; he'd believe anything. Mary and Sue were hippies; they hated their folks."

"So Doris kept her story to herself."

Shrug.

"Why didn't you tell them Lowell's story about the fight?"

"I told you, he didn't want any of that getting out. Nothing that could connect Karen to him. Actually, he made up the other story as a replacement. At first he said to say her father abused her. I didn't make it that strong."

"Why not?"

"It just wasn't right- too much."

Looking at me, as if for praise.

"So the others bought it," I said, "but Doris didn't. And she started to wonder if the little kid had seen something happen to Karen."

"She didn't know anything for sure, but she came to me and told me about finding the kid. Kind of thinking out loud."

"Wanting more than two fifty."

Silence.

"How much did you give her?"

"Seven fifty more."

"One thousand total. How much did she think Lowell gave you?"

Hesitation.

"It's just a matter of time before we find her and ask her, Gwen."

"Two and a half thousand," she said very softly.

"So she thought she was getting more than you. When did she realize you'd held back on her?"

"She didn't."

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