Stuart Woods - Kisser

“Yes, I’m very pleased with it,” Mitzi said.

“Oh, by the way,” Hildy said, “I ran into Ralph Lauren this morning; he sends his regards.”

“That’s sweet of him,” Mitzi said. “Do you like the lamps?”

“Very much,” Hildy said, and Sharpe murmured an assent.

“Ralph found them at one of the Paris flea markets,” Mitzi said.

“Wonderful places,” Patti Larsen interjected.

“Aren’t they?” Mitzi said.

Conversation continued along these lines until they finally made their way downstairs. Stone and Mitzi got into the Bentley, and the other two couples boarded their own black Town Car.

“How did drinks go?” Tom asked from the front seat of the Bentley.

“Just as you’d expect,” Mitzi said. “We’re all squared away on the Hockney and Ralph Lauren.”

“ Lexington and Seventy-sixth, please, Tom,” Stone said.

SETTE MEZZO WAS, as always, crowded with the voluble, so Stone reckoned their conversation would be subdued at a table for six, since they wouldn’t be able to hear each other. They were shown to a corner table, which helped. Sharpe revealed himself as never having been to the restaurant by ordering martinis for everyone. If he had been there before, Stone thought, he would have known that the restaurant served only wine, except for secret bottles of Scotch and vodka kept for more demanding guests. Stone now knew that he would be buying dinner.

Mitzi was seated between Sharpe and Sig Larsen, and Stone between Patti Larsen and Hildy Parsons. This meant that Stone would have difficulty, in the noisy restaurant, understanding what Sharpe and Larsen were saying to Mitzi, not that she would have any difficulty handling them.

“So, Stone,” Patti Larsen said, “what do you do?” Her hand crept onto his knee.

“I’m an attorney,” Stone replied. “I sue people.”

She removed her hand. “How nice for you.”

“Usually,” Stone replied.

“Where is your office?”

“I’m of counsel to Woodman & Weld, but I work from offices in my home.”

“That’s cozy,” she said. Her knee was now rubbing against his.

Stone turned to Hildy and made conversation.

WHEN THE CHECK came, Stone picked it up and signed it, avoiding a scene where Sharpe and Larsen would be short of cash. What the hell, he thought, Bill Eggers would be getting the bill anyway.

BACK IN the Bentley, Stone asked Mitzi how it had gone at dinner.

“They were pressing me about Sig giving me financial advice,” Mitzi said.

“Was that true about the financial people in your father’s office?”

“Yes, but there’s only one; I made up the other two.”

“Why don’t you call him and ask him to make up a fictitious financial statement and stock portfolio?” Stone suggested. “Something that will water Sharpe’s mouth?”

“What a good idea,” she said. “I’ll do it first thing Monday morning. That should thicken the plot.”

“I think that, after they see your statement, you should broach the subject of drugs. I’d advise you to tell them the stuff is for friends, not for you. You don’t want to get into a situation where you’re pressed to actually use something around witnesses. That could blow your case.”

“I’m way ahead of you,” Mitzi said.

“Believe her,” Tom added.

Stone did.

STONE GOT A CALL from Bob Cantor the next morning. “Hey, Bob.”

“Hey, Stone. Willie Leahy thinks he and his brother should be back on Carrie’s case.”

“Yeah, he told me he followed us to Atlanta.”

“And he told you about the P.I. with the loaded gun and the silencer?”

“Yes.”

“Doesn’t that make you think the Leahys should be back on the case?”

“But the P.I. was in Atlanta, not New York.”

“Max has already made one stab at her, so to speak, in New York. Why wouldn’t he try again?”

“Because Carrie settled everything with him in Atlanta. He even wrote her a check.”

“Has the check cleared?”

“We’re working on that.”

“And why, if it clears, do you think Max would lose interest in hurting her?”

“Well…”

“In my experience, guys who hate their ex-wives go right on hating them, even after giving them the money. In fact, they hate them more after giving them the money.”

“You have a point,” Stone admitted.

Joan buzzed him. “Carrie Cox on two.”

“Hang on, Bob.” Stone put him on hold and pressed the button for line two. “Carrie?”

“Hi. I’m at the bank, and they’ve put a hold on the funds in Max’s account. The check will clear tomorrow.”

“That’s good news. Hang on a minute, will you?” Stone went back to Cantor. “Bob, let’s put them on her for another week.”

“It will be done,” Cantor said and then hung up.

Stone went back to line two. “I’ve got some news,” he said. “Good news, I hope.”

“No.”

“Oh, God, what now?”

“Willie Leahy followed us to Atlanta on Friday, and he caught an Atlanta private investigator following us.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

“Bob Cantor makes the point that ex-husbands hate their ex-wives even more after giving them money, and the P.I. was carrying a loaded gun and a homemade silencer.”

“And what does that mean?”

“It means that he planned to shoot us-or at least, you-quietly, so nobody would notice.”

“That doesn’t sound like Max.”

“Who else hates you?” Stone asked.

“Nobody-at least not enough to actually have me murdered.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“Of course, I’m sure.”

“Then it’s Max. I’ve put the Leahys back on you; cooperate with them, will you?”

“Oh, Stone!”

“Do you want to make it to opening night? Someone who hates you might love to prevent your dream from coming true.”

“Oh,” she said. “I see your point. All right, I will welcome Willie and Pete back into my life.”

“Give them a nice gift, a necktie maybe.”

“I’ll give them some new cologne-the one they wear is toxic.”

“Good idea.”

“Gotta run; I’m due at rehearsal. Dinner tonight?”

“Come over here, and I’ll cook you something.”

“Done. Seven?”

“Good.”

She hung up.

FIFTY FEET from Carrie Cox’s front stoop, Willie Leahy sat in his car surveying the street. He got out of the car and looked both ways, then crossed the street and looked again.

The speaker/microphone for the radio on his belt popped on. “We’re ready. Everything okay?”

“Everything okay,” Willie replied. He crossed the street, got into the car, and drove up to Carrie’s stoop. Peter hustled her into the car. “Where we off to?” Willie asked.

“To Stone Barrington’s house,” she replied.

“Gotcha.” Willie headed for Turtle Bay.

As he turned into Stone’s block, he slowed. “A guy I don’t like, across the street from Stone’s,” he said. “Black raincoat.”

“Drop me here,” Peter replied, “and go around the block.”

Willie did so. “Carrie, lie down on the backseat,” he said.

“Will do. Are there bad guys?”

“Maybe. We’ll know soon.” Willie drove slowly past the man and made mental notes: five-eleven, two hundred, suit and tie under the raincoat, forty to forty-five. He drove around the block.

PETER LEAHY PUT his hands in his coat pockets and walked down the block at a normal pace. As he came up to the man in the black raincoat he stopped behind him and whispered in his ear, “Don’t turn around.”

The man froze.

“The guy who lives in that house doesn’t like loiterers,” he said.

“It’s a free country,” the man replied, not moving.