Alane Ferguson - The Circle of Blood

“I’m not hiding. I’ve just been busy.”

“You can’t stop taking your pills. You know better.”

She dropped back into the chair. “Those pills make me feel flat. It’s like… it’s like my head is all wrapped up in cotton. It’s like the color has bled out of my life and all that’s left is black and white. I wanted to experience Cameryn without the meds.” She leaned forward, her face flush with excitement as her voice rose, almost shrill. “Justin, since I stopped I’ve felt so much better. I’m on fire again. All those years of doing what the doctors told me. They were wrong. I stopped medicating myself and something woke up inside. I’ve got my energy and I feel like I’m alive! ”

The knowledge twisted through Cameryn like a snake. Her mother had stopped taking medication because of her.

“Is that why you came to see me?” Hannah asked. “To make sure I’m on my meds? As far as I know, failure to take medication is not a crime.”

“That’s not why, Hannah.” Justin’s voice was gentle. “I came because of our Baby Doe. We’ve got a name for her now. The victim was Esther Childs.”

“Esther?” Hannah paused. She sat back in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest tight, as if to hold herself in.

“Have you ever seen this girl before? I’m talking about Saturday, December ninth. Here’s what she looks like.” Justin handed Hannah a picture.

Hannah glanced at the photograph and gave an exaggerated shrug. “No. I’ve never seen her.”

Justin paused. “We have a witness who saw the two of you together. You and Esther. Our witness said you were talking to the girl in your blue Pinto shortly before she died.”

Cameryn’s heart beat wildly as she watched her mother’s face go through a range of expressions. Cocking her head, Hannah pulled the photograph within an inch of her eyes.

“Who told you they saw me?” she asked. "A man from town. Don’t lie, Hannah. Just tell me what happened.”

“I was confused because of the hair. The girl I picked up had long hair.”

“So you recognize her now?”

“I think she might be the child I found at the gas station. But then she ran away and I never saw her again.” Hannah returned the picture. “That girl’s death has nothing to do with me.”

“I’m sure it doesn’t,” replied Justin. “But I need to ask you some questions, and I want you to answer honestly. This has turned into a homicide investigation. The rules have changed.”

“Homicide.” Hannah’s hands grabbed her elbows so hard Cameryn could see the jut of every knuckle. “Cameryn told me it was a suicide.”

“That’s what we thought at first. But we were wrong.”

“So you were wrong.” Hannah jumped to her feet. Still clutching her arms she began to pace the room. “Talking to a girl isn’t a crime. All I did was talk to her. What are you saying, Justin? What are you implying?” Her voice had become high and frightened. “I thought you came as a friend and you’ve come as a deputy. You’re here thinking-Why are you here?” She caught Cameryn’s eye and shrieked, "Cammie! ”

Cameryn felt her skin jump at the sound of her name. The door swung open. Justin stared at her, his eyes electric, but he didn’t get up. In his hand he held a notebook and a pen.

“Cammie called me right before you came, Justin,” Hannah insisted. “Right before you came. She says she knows who committed the murder.”

“What do you know about this?” he asked her quietly.

Her mind worked furiously. Hannah didn’t know that the clues had tied together through the ring. How could she? But the truth had to come out, so there was nothing to do now but tell it.

“Esther left this ring in my mother’s car,” Cameryn said, pulling it from her pocket. “Here, take it.”

With thumb and forefinger, Justin lifted it from her open palm. He peered at it, then at her, stunned. “When did you get this?”

“Yesterday.”

"So you knew-? ” But Cameryn cut him off with, “Look at what it says. ‘Keep Sweet.’ I wrote Jo Ann Whittaker. She did some research-”

His eyes flashed. “You shared information about an active homicide case-”

“Justin, please, let me finish.” Cameryn took a breath. Hannah had stopped moving and was staring. Everything had become suddenly still, as if the room itself were holding its breath. “Jo Ann found out that ‘Keep Sweet’ is a saying used by Fundamentalist polygamists. If Esther had that ring, she was from a polygamist family.” Cameryn turned to her mother. “What did she say to you when she put it in the cup holder?”

“She said she didn’t need it anymore.”

“Right. She was running away. Girls her age are married off, and I bet she didn’t want to be. Except they’re not allowed to leave. Remember, Justin, how strange her underwear looked? We saw the polygamists on the street, how the women were dressed… I think Esther was running, and she got caught. And her hair was cut off. I’ll bet that’s something they would do.” Cameryn looked from Justin to her mother. “We need to check it out.”

“Tell me this again,” Justin said. “Slowly this time.”

She did, filling in each detail as she repeated everything. There’d be trouble ahead for her, she realized that, but as her words tumbled over each other, it felt so good to free herself from the guilt she’d been carrying. Every part of the story came out, even about the wallet. “Esther must have been pretty desperate. I mean, I don’t think she looked like a thief, but she was. Justin, when I thought it was a suicide I didn’t see any reason to tell.”

“So, Esther stole your mother’s wallet.”

“Yes.”

“And you think she must have chucked it in a garbage can before the polygamists shot her.”

“Or maybe they took it. I don’t know. It wasn’t at the autopsy.”

“You mean this wallet?” Justin stood and walked to her mother’s dresser. The oak top was covered with a lace doily, and there, on top, lay her mother’s brown leather wallet. Cameryn had seen it before. It had a small gold tab with the words DOONEY & BOURKE stamped above the image of a goose.

Behind her, Cameryn heard her mother’s voice cry, “Oh my God, Cammie. I promise, I can explain.”

Cameryn, her muscles growing tight as wires, stared at the wallet as Justin picked it up.

“No, look at me, Cammie,” Hannah begged, the skin on her face blanching to the same sickly color Mariah’s had taken in death. “I can explain,” Hannah cried wildly. “Cammie-all right-you’ve found my wallet and I know it looks bad. That’s why I didn’t tell before. I wanted to but I couldn’t.”

Too stunned to speak, Cameryn blocked her mother out. Justin undid the wallet’s clasp and there was her mother’s driver’s license, the credit cards shining from their plastic sleeves. There was no mistake. It belonged to Hannah. All the other noise of the world seemed to have gone silent; the only sound was blood pulsing through her ears.

“Cammie, look at me.” Her mother gripped Cameryn’s arm, but Cameryn’s eyes dropped to the floor. “Please, Cammie! Justin.” Riveting her gaze on the deputy, she cried, “I know how it looks, but you have to understand. I kept searching for Mariah and I thought I saw a patch of blue, so I went down that alleyway. I swear to God when I saw her, Mariah-Esther-she was already dead. I swear to God.” The eyes were back on Cameryn now; she could feel the intensity of her mother’s stare. Hannah cried, “I swear on Jayne’s grave and on anything else. You’ve got to believe me! I saw the backpack and I thought”-her grip became iron-“I thought-this girl is already dead. I didn’t want anyone to know. So I took what was mine.”