Carol Clark - Laced

Anna’s mother lived in upstate New York. They had promised to visit her and stopped at the mall to buy her Christmas present. Explaining to her why they suddenly couldn’t make it home for Christmas had been a challenge, but explaining Bobby’s missing teeth would have been harder. They decided to head across the country and put as much distance as possible between the scene of the crime and a trip to the dentist. They dropped off their rental car at the after-hours lot in New York City and boarded a bus to Pennsylvania, where they rented a four-door sedan. Christmas dinner was eaten in a truck stop. Bobby dined on soup and apple sauce. They arrived in Los Angeles to find everyone gone for the holidays and spent a week in a hotel waiting for the highly touted Dr. Favorman to return from St. Bart’s.

All for a necklace that meant so little to them.

Bobby really wished he could turn the nitrous back on. He was feeling depressed and scared. There was nothing remotely cheery in the harsh little treatment room, nothing at all to lift a patient’s spirits-except, of course, the tank of nitrous, that was now off-limits.

“Your dentist has talent,” Sharkey allowed. He was bent over a side table, stirring a grayish paste with a steel utensil. Bobby thought he looked like a mad scientist. “Where did you say the man is based?”

I didn’t, Bobby thought, but he had to give an answer. “He’s in New York.”

“‘New York, New York, what a wonderful town,’” Sharkey sang. “Mother and Dad and I went there years ago. It was a brilliant trip. Brilliant.”

“Um-hmmm,” Bobby said.

“If I get back there, I’d love to watch your dentist in action. He’s a master.” Sharkey straightened up. “I’ll fix you up with this temporary cap. It should hold you till you get home. Now open wide…”

Bobby closed his eyes while Dr. Sharkey pushed the cap up against his stub, then picked and poked and prodded inside his mouth.

“Voila!” Sharkey finally announced. “Take a look.”

With great trepidation Bobby opened his eyes. Dr. Sharkey held up a mirror to his face. Bobby grimaced at his tired reflection, made worse by the harsh fluourscent light overhead, and then smiled. A big bulky chunk of matter, resembling an oversized and slightly faded kernel of corn, stood in stark contrast to the rest of his Hollywood smile. He had to squelch the impulse to scream, jump out of the chair, and throw Dr. Sharkey against the wall. I look like Goofy, he thought desperately. But he knew he couldn’t make a scene. It was too dangerous with Jack Reilly on his tail.

Dr. Sharkey was smiling expectantly. “Now I have to remind you that this is temporary. If you want me to complete the job and make you a permanent cap, I’d be more than happy to. The lab work will take a little time.”

“No,” Bobby said immediately. “Thank you, but no. We’re flying to Los Angeles, and I’ll see my dentist-”

“Didn’t you say your dentist was in New York?”

“He is,” Bobby insisted. “He is. We had plans to go to Los Angeles first.” Get me out of here, he thought. He yanked the bib off his chest. “Thank you, Dr. Sharkey.”

“Take a sample of this paste,” Sharkey instructed. “If it falls out, and I don’t think it will, just…”

If it falls off, I’ll consider myself lucky, Bobby thought desperately.

Sharkey opened the door to the waiting room. “Mother will take care of you.”

Anna jumped up from her rickety chair. One look at Bobby’s face, and she knew things weren’t good.

“He’s all set to go,” Dr. Sharkey said cordially, walking over to the reception desk.

“They’re paying cash,” Mother Sharkey announced.

Dr. Sharkey scribbled on a form and handed it to his mother. “We don’t accept cash!”

His mother nodded almost imperceptibly, having heard this joke at least a thousand times. “We have an emergency coming in. Don’t put away your special paste. It’s another broken tooth.”

“This is our day for emergencies!”

Anna quickly paid the bill and escorted a strangely silent Bobby out to the car. Before turning on the ignition, Anna turned to him. “Let’s see.”

With a crazed look in his eye, Bobby lifted his upper lip.

Anna tried to keep a straight face. “It’s okay-” she began.

“It’s not okay!” Bobby yelled. “It’s horrible. I look like Goofy. We’ve got to get a flight out tonight.”

“No!” Anna said. “You’ll be fine for the next few days. I have something very exciting to tell you.” She started the car. “We have one more job in Ireland that will make us very happy and”-she added with a laugh-“Jack Reilly very unhappy.”

“I want to go to Los Angeles,” Bobby insisted as they drove down the block.

“No, Bobby. Listen to me for a minute. They recently discovered priceless Claddagh rings…”

Inside the dental office, Dr. Sharkey poured himself a cup of tea from the shamrock-covered thermos.

“How’s Daddy?” he asked his mother who, surprisingly, was engrossed in a program offering tips on home decorating.

“I checked on him a little while ago. He’s fine.”

Upstairs in the living room, Seamus Sharkey was sitting near the window, unseen by people in the street. He passed his time reading detective novels and watching the clients who ventured in and out of his son’s dental practice. Ever since a walk-in client had bolted without paying six years ago, he made sure to write down the license plate numbers, makes, and models of every patient’s car. He also recorded his impressions of the patients themselves.

Too many dishonest folks in this world, he thought. You can never be too careful. During dinner he liked to hear about all the people Danny had treated that day. Danny told such funny stories about them. He couldn’t wait to hear about the two who had just left, but he didn’t think their story would be funny. It looked as if the guy had started yelling at the woman he was with as soon as they got in the car.

Seamus leaned forward. Another car had pulled into the driveway, and an older woman was being helped out of the backseat. It seemed odd that a casually dressed yet upscale-looking young couple would be driving around in such a beat-up old wreck. Once again Seamus picked up his notebook and pen from the table next to him.

They don’t need a security camera with me around, he thought proudly. Danny boy is so good to us, I wish I could be of more help to him. Who knows? he thought. Maybe one day, even if it’s after I’ve passed, these notes will be helpful.

Keith Waters had been at the office since early morning. He had slept fitfully, aggravated by the fact that Jane and John Doe were ruining Jack’s honeymoon. I’m going to do everything I can to track them down, he told himself.

The results of the inquiry into the credit card the couple had used at Hennessy Castle weren’t surprising. It was another case of stolen identity. The Does, armed with the social security number of one Earl Norton, had ordered a credit card in Norton’s name and had it sent to a P.O. box in Suffern, New York, last month. Suffern was less than an hour’s drive from New York City.

So they were in this vicinity not very long ago, Keith thought. But there’s no chance they’ll darken the doorstep of that post office again. They have probably cut the credit card in half by now. He sighed. Identity theft was becoming an epidemic, making it that much easier for people like the Does to keep on the move.

Keith looked over their file. Besides the event at the Metropolitan Museum of Art that Regan and Jack had attended last year, the Does had also left behind their calling cards after heists in Chicago, Miami, Birmingham, Dallas, Atlanta, London, and Sydney. I guess they’re not multilingual, Keith thought. It appears they’re only comfortable operating in English-speaking cities. Let’s hope for the Parisians’ sake that they don’t take up French.