James Bell - Deadlock

The next heading was “Morality.”

What has been said of beauty may also be said of morality. We all behave as if there is a standard, a real right and wrong. Somebody who cuts me off in traffic either believes he has that “right,” or wants to “get away with it.” In either case, he believes in a moral standard.

This is true of all morality, in all cultures. As historian Will Durant writes in The Lessons of History, one who studies history will see “the universality of moral codes.”

As with the sense of beauty, the sense of morality must come from outside nature, and it must be given by a Being who gives us morality, a set of laws designed for our own benefit, intentionally. A moral lawgiver, in fact.

Millie shook her head. At least he got to the heart of matters quickly. Verbose counsel never impressed the justices. Holden was clipped and assured.

But his assurance was still bothersome. Okay, she told herself, be objective about it. When she considered a case, Millie always spent at least a little time in the shoes of each party to better understand the opposing viewpoints.

So she asked herself, What if I really did change my mind about God? And her initial reaction was a kind of muted fright.

She breathed deeply. What would a belief in God actually do to her after so many years? Would it affect her judicial philosophy? Now wouldn’t that be opening a can of political worms.

A loud crash interrupted her thoughts – the unmistakable percussion of metallic kitchenware falling on the hard tile of the kitchen floor.

“Mom?” Millie called out. She waited. No answer came. She called out again, louder this time.

No answer.

“Sarah Mae,” Charlene said gently, “how old are you?”

This was it. Sarah Mae’s testimony from the witness stand would be the deciding factor in the case. Winsor had undermined her expert witness. Now the story had to be told by the one who lived it.

There was no turning back. Charlene had used all of her persuasive powers to get Aggie to go along with continuing the trial. It was greed that did it. Aggie’s. Eight hundred thousand could become at least a million, Charlene had said. They increased the first offer. They would easily go into seven figures next. You can trust me, Aggie.

But greed was not why Charlene was continuing the trial. The case was God’s will, Granddad notwithstanding. Charlene was taking this trial to the limit, and there was no way she could lose. No way. Sarah Mae’s testimony was too compelling. God’s will was too clear. Charlene Moore was God’s woman.

And the next few minutes were the key to the whole thing.

Big doe eyes looked back at Charlene. “Eighteen,” Sarah Mae said.

“And where do you live?”

“Dudley.”

“With your mother?”

“Yeah.”

“And brothers and sisters?”

Sarah Mae nodded. Judge Lewis said, “You need to answer out loud, so the reporter can hear you. Do you understand?”

Again Sarah Mae nodded. Then quickly added, “Yeah.”

Charlene paused to let Sarah Mae recover a bit. “Sarah Mae, tell us about that day two years ago when you found out you were pregnant.”

The girl swallowed and took a deep breath. “I started to feeling sickly. But there wasn’t nothing wrong with me. Least I didn’t think there was. But I got sickly and threw up. I didn’t want to tell Mama because I knew why I was doing that, throwing up. So I went to that place that I saw on the telephone pole.”

“Was that the National Parental Planning Clinic?”

“Objection,” Winsor said. “Leading.”

“Sustained.”

Charlene said, “What was the name of the place you saw on the telephone pole?”

“National… what you just said.”

“Do you remember it in your own mind?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“It was in Dudley?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“You went there because you thought you might be pregnant?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Sarah Mae, without mentioning names, tell the jury why you thought you were pregnant.”

Sarah Mae Sherman looked at her hands. Her fingers were locked together. “I saw this boy for a spell. I thought we was in love. Turns out I was. He weren’t.”

Charlene paused. She caught a quick glance of Aggie Sherman, seated in the front row. She was also looking at her hands.

“Now, when you went into the clinic, what was the first thing that happened?”

Sarah Mae’s chest went up and down as she breathed. “They was all friendly at first. They had a lady behind a desk and she sat me down.”

“Do you remember this lady’s name?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Continue then. What happened next?”

“I told her what I thought. She said I could have a test to see. I asked her if I had to tell my mama, and she said no, I didn’t have to tell my mama nothin’, and there’s no law said I had to.”

Charlene paused. “And did you have a test?”

“Yes.”

“What kind was it?”

Sarah Mae looked embarrassed. “Of my urine.”

“What was the result?”

“I was pregnant.”

Charlene paused a moment, letting the story take on a natural flow. “When it came time to talk to the lady about what to do, Sarah Mae, can you tell us what she said?”

Beau Winsor said, “Objection. Hearsay.”

“State of mind, Your Honor,” Charlene said.

“Overruled. The witness may answer.”

Sarah Mae looked from the judge to Charlene. “She asked if I was wantin’ to have an abortion.”

“That was the first thing she said?”

“Uh-huh.”

“What did you say?”

“Said I didn’t want no abortion. Said I wanted to keep my baby.”

“And what was her response?”

“She said it weren’t no baby yet.”

Again Charlene paused. This was crucial. “What did you say?”

“I said weren’t it gonna be a baby?”

“And the response?”

“She said did I know what I was getting myself into, having a baby when I was sixteen? And then I was thinkin’ that maybe she was right and all. I was gettin’ scared. She told me everything would be all right if I got it.”

“The abortion?”

“Yeah.”

“Did this lady ask you any questions about your past medical history?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Your background?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Anything about your past at all?”

“No.”

“Did you think about talking to your mama about all this?”

Sarah Mae looked to the first row, her eyes starting to tear up. “No, ma’am.”

“Can you tell us why?”

“’Cause…”

“It’s all right, Sarah Mae. Take your time.”

“I was afraid she’d get mad.” Tears started from the corners of Sarah Mae’s eyes. Her voice warbled. “I was afraid she’d think I was a bad girl.” Sarah Mae put her face in her hands and sobbed.

“Miss Moore,” Judge Lewis said. “Do you want to take a short recess?”

Charlene did not want to if she could avoid it. Sarah Mae’s emotion was important for the jury to see.

“Sarah Mae,” Charlene said softly. “Do you need to stop?”

The girl sniffed and wiped her eyes with the back of her right hand. “No, ma’am.”

The judge told the clerk to put a box of tissues on the witness rail. Sarah Mae took one and daubed at her eyes.

“All right,” Charlene said. “Tell us what happened next.”

“Dr. Sager gave another test, where they look at what’s inside.”

“Did he call this a sonogram?”

“Uh-huh.”

“And that’s where the doctor puts a device right on your stomach, so he can see a picture of the baby inside you?”

“Object to use of the word baby ,” Winsor said.