Denise Mina - Resolution

He had changed in the year since she had seen him. He was dressed in a conservative suit, a white shirt and a dark tie. He was balder and had two long parallel white scars on his jawline below his ear. His shoes were highly polished. He looked at her helplessly, opened his limp hands towards her, pleading.

"Hey, Benny," said Josh, "come here."

Benny approached the table, circling Maureen as if he was afraid of her. Josh tried to start some showy banter with him, teasing him about his team, but Benny didn't respond. He was looking at Maureen. "Can I speak to you?" said Benny quietly, his teeth clenched tightly.

"I've got nothing to say to you," said Maureen, looking at her coffee.

Maureen and Liam didn't see Benny anymore, not since Angus Farrell had blackmailed him, threatening his golden future, using him to inveigle his way into Maureen's house and plant evidence. Liam beat up Benny so badly he spent two weeks in hospital. They lied to each other now and said they didn't miss Benny, didn't wonder what he was up to or think about him. There was some suggestion that Winnie had met him at AA but Maureen was afraid to ask Liam about it.

"I need to talk," said Benny. "It's about Monday."

Maureen looked at him. Benny had grown up. He had dips in his cheeks, under his eyes, Al Pacino pouches that made him look old. The last time she had seen Benny was after Liam beat him up: he had been lying in a bed at the Albert, his eyes purple and swollen like tennis balls, his wrist broken and his jaw wired together. She'd poked him in the eye and walked away. Had it been any other time, even a couple of days ago, she'd have snubbed him but now everything was coming to an end and Benny felt like part of a happier past. He knew Angus, had fucked her over for him before, and as far as she knew he was probably the source of the video and the pictures, but she wanted to talk to him. She wondered if Liam would see it that way. He probably missed Benny just as much as she did but he'd never admit it. She stood up slowly, and followed him to a nearby empty table, clutching her coffee and sitting down opposite him, waiting for him to speak.

"How have ye been?" he asked.

"Okay."

Benny looked around the tabletop. "I heard about Farrell's case coming up on Monday, I saw you in the papers."

"You've got scars." She gestured to his jaw and he raised his hand, touched the ridges of skin on his face.

"Aye," he said sadly. "Long-term reminder of the fact that I'm a skank." He tried to smile at her but she wasn't having it. He put his hands on the table, sitting one on top of the other. "Mauri, I'm so sorry. I know ye can never forgive me." He looked up to see how he was doing but she glared back and he dropped his eyes to his hands again. "I can't defend what I did. I didn't think Farrell was that smart, I didn't think he'd get away with what he did. He threatened to make my record public if I didn't help him. I'm sorry I hurt you."

"You didn't hurt me, Benny, ye put me in terrible danger-ye discussed aspects of my psychiatric history with a man so he wouldn't spoil your chances of a good job. Do you know why he killed Douglas?"

Benny looked at her. "I thought they fell out."

"Angus was raping catatonic patients in a psychiatric unit and Douglas found out. He killed him to cover up. That's what you were participating in, that's who you were helping."

Benny cringed, rubbing hard at his eyes, digging his fingers deep into the sockets.

"And you claim to be sober and leading a good life?" she said.

"I don't claim that," he said, sitting up to face her, looking like the Benny she used to know. "I just claim to be doing my best. At that time I didn't know what the consequences of my actions were. I lied to myself about what I was doing and why I was doing it. I thought ye'd be okay-I was lying to myself. I don't have an excuse but I'm sorry and I'm trying not to lie to myself now."

He sat back and dropped his head, showing her his crown as he rubbed his hand over the cropped hair. It wasn't a very satisfying explanation but it was honest and he wasn't pretending not to be responsible. She heard his hand rasp across his head and wondered if he was still in the same flat in Maryhill, how his sister was and whether he'd seen Winnie, what films he was into just now and why he was in court today. But he'd fucked her over for Angus before. He could have run up the road to her house in his lunch hour, dropped the video and been back here without anyone noticing.

"What videos are ye watching these days?" she said, watching his face carefully.

"Oh, man" – his face lit up, eager and enthusiastic – "Takeshi Kitano. Have ye seen anything by him?"

She shook her head.

"You should. Violent Cop, it's fucking brilliant. And Hana Bi . Get it out."

There was nothing in his face or manner to suggest that he knew what she was hinting at so she tried again. "You enjoy watching videos, don't you?" she said solemnly.

Benny looked at her dumbly.

"And looking at photographs."

His face twitched and he sat back, staring at her, baffled. "Wha'?"

She leaned in, watching him carefully. "Do I like to look at photographs, do you think?"

Benny laughed, puzzled. "Are you trying to find out if I'm a mason or something?"

Maureen realized that she sounded like a cold-war cliché. She snorted, trying not to catch his eye or guffaw at the preposterous-ness of it all.

"How's the big man these days?" he said.

It was an old joke. Liam was half a foot shorter than Benny. She didn't like him sounding so familiar. "Liam's studying," she said formally, claiming ownership.

"I heard he got into uni."

"He's making films."

"I see Winnie sometimes. She tells me you two aren't speaking."

"Well, she's lying out of her arse, I'm not speaking. She won't stop speaking."

They looked each other in the eye but it was too much too soon and they looked away to opposite sides of the room.

"See this Monday?" said Benny.

"Aye."

"This has to be in confidence. I heard this from someone in his lawyer's office. If it gets out they'll know it's come from me. Promise ye won't repeat it?"

She didn't trust him. "I won't repeat it," she said, uncertain that she was telling the truth.

"He's pleading automatism. D'you know what that is?"

"Sounds like a sci-fi disease from the thirties," she said, imagining a giant tin robot doing Angus's bidding.

Benny smiled. "It kind of is." He glanced cautiously up at her. "Automatism means he didn't have the mental intent to do it. He's bringing evidence that he was given drugs without his consent or knowledge and that the drugs made him do it."

Maureen was startled. "But that's crap," she said. She had fed him the acid long after he had killed Douglas and a good few days after he had killed Martin.

"They don't have much physical evidence against him for Douglas. They'd probably need to bring evidence of the rapes to get a conviction for killing him. I don't know who drugged him. I think it was you but-" Benny looked at her for a prompt but she didn't give him one. "They're going to make a big thing about you having a copy of Douglas's marriage certificate in your house as well, try to build on it, say you were jealous and stuff like that. Be careful what you say. You could find yourself on an assault charge."

Maureen had stopped listening. She was sitting upright, staring across the room, smiling to herself. She could get Ella McGee's death certificate from the registrar's office, just as she had got a copy of Douglas's marriage certificate. She noticed that Benny was watching her.

"They can't force me into giving evidence against myself, can they?"

"Yeah," said Benny. "Of course they can."

"Can't I plead the Fifth Amendment?"