Lawrence Sanders - Private Pleasures

"Well, I don't understand why you drink so much alcohol when it makes Mother and me so unhappy, and you say you love us and all." a golf He stood up. "I've got to go, baby, I'm late for date. Tell your mother not to expect me for dinner."

Then I knew he was just going to keep on doing like he was and nothing was going to be different. So I decided I better run away with Chet Barrow.

Chet didn't have much money and neither did I, but I thought that maybe if I left home my parents would be worried and Daddy would be so sorry for the way he had treated us that he really would change. Then even if the police found me and brought me back, Mother and Daddy would be so glad that everything would be better.

It was like a book I read that my uncle wrote. It was called The Adventures of Tommy Termite. It was about this boy termite who runs away because he thinks his parents don't love him and sometimes they are mean to him. A lot of things happen to him, some good and some bad, but finally he decides to go home and he finds his folks were worried sick about him, and now they love him and treat him nice.

I went looking for Chet, and he was in their garage. He was sitting on an old wooden box and looking at a folding map of the entire country.

I sat down on the box next to him.

"What are you doing, Chet?" I asked him.

"I've been thinking, " he said. "Look at how big the country is. See here-this dot? That's our town. just look at all the places I've never been-the whole rest of the map."

"Are you looking for a place you want to go when you run away?"

"Not so loud," he said. "My dad went to the lab, but Mom's still in the house. Your father's in there, too.

"He is? He told me he had a golf date."

"Maybe he does. I heard him say he just stopped by to bum a cigarette.

Hey, look here-this is the Intracoastal Waterway.

You know where that is, don't you? "

"Of course. It's near Federal Highway."

"That's right. And it goes all the way up the coast. You get on a boat down here and you can go all the way up to Maine.

Isn't that neat?"

"Uh-huh. Is that what you're going to do?"

I'm just planning things."

"I haven't decided yet.

"Did you do what you promised?"

"What did I promise?"

"That you'd think about letting me go with you."

"Yeah, I been thinking about it. But I don't know… It could be dangerous.

You might get hurt

"I don't care. I want to go."

Well, I'll keep planning about it. That don't mean I'm leaving tomorrow."

"Doesn't. I don't care how long it takes to decide. I talked to my father this morning, and nothing is going to change in my house so I might as well go."

"Your mother will cry-"

"She cries now, Chet, and I'm still there."

He tried to fold up his map but he made a mess of it so I took it from him and folded it up right. We sat there awhile without talking. Chet scratched his ankle. ,You know," he said, "grown-ups are supposed to be so smart.

I don't think they're so smart, do you?"

"Sometimes they can be dumb," I said. "Like this morning my father told me he couldn't stop drinking alcohol. You know that film we had at school about taking dope? It was like that, like he was addicted and couldn't stop."

Maybe he is. Addicted, I mean."

"He could stop if he wanted to- Like I used to eat candy bars all the time. I got so fat. Remember that?

"Yeah, I remember."

"Well, I decided I'd just quit and I did. Once I make up my mind to do something, I do it."

"But that's you. People are different."

"Well, I don't see why my father can't just decide to quit, and then he would."

"I don't know," Chet said. "Ernie Hamilton wants to stop picking at his zits and he's still doing it."

"Because he's a stupid boy."

"You really think so?"

"Yes. I do."

"Do you think I'm stupid, Tania?"

"Of course not. I think you're very smart. You get all good marks, don't you?"

"Well, maybe not all, but a lot of them. You're smart, too."

"Thank you," I said.

He turned to face me. Suddenly he leaned forward and kissed me right on the mouth. It was the first time a boy had ever kissed me. I pulled back.

"You shouldn't have done that," I told him.

"Sure I should," he said. "Did you like it?"

"Yes," I said. reg went in to work on Saturday-he does that a lot-and Chester was outside when Herman Todd stopped by to ask if I could spare a cigarette.

He looked sharp in a plaid sport jacket and lime green slacks. He said he had a golf date but he didn't seem to be in any hurry.

I was in the kitchen making a meat loaf we were going to have for dinner that night. And I was watching a travelogue about Baluchistan on the little portable TV I keep on the counter. But I turned it off when Herman came in and gave him a cigarette.

"You look very snazzy this morning," I told him.

"And you don't look like Mother Hubbard yourself," he said, grinning.

"Now those are really short shorts.

"I like to be comfortable around the house," I said.

"There's no point in dressing up to make a meat loaf or run a vacuum."

"It's a wonder Greg can get any work done if you dress like that," he said. "Is he around?"

"No, he went to the lab."

"All work and no play," he said. "Doesn't he ever relax?

"Not very often."

"Too bad. He doesn't know what he's missing. How about you, Mabel?

What do you do for kicks?"

"Watch Baluchistan on television."

"That sounds tame. Don't you ever get an urge to take a walk on the wild side?"

I was working at the sink and didn't look at him. "Such as?"

I asked.

"Oh, this and that," he said. "There's a big, wonderful world out there, Mabel. A lot of fun, a lot of laughs. You should be getting your share."

"Someday," I said. "Maybe."

He came up close behind me and put a hand on my fanny.

"Don't wait too long, sweetie," he whispered in my ear. "You and I could have a great scene together.

"Yeah?" I said. "How could we do that?" I don't know why I said it.

"It could be worked," he said, stroking my can. "Trust me.

It would take some finagling, but it could be done. Will you think about it?"

I nodded, still not looking at him. He gave my butt a final pat and then he left. I held the edge of the sink because I was shaking. It was the first time a man had come on to me since my marriage, and I was all bollixed up. I decided I better tell Dr. Noble about it. That's what I was paying her for, wasn't itadvice.

I had a session with Cherry on Tuesday and told her how I had been propositioned. I didn't say who it was, but I had already mentioned Herman Todd so she probably guessed.

"How do you feel about it?" she asked me.

"Shaky," I said. "I want to and I don't want to. Oh, shit, I don't know how I feel. Tickled in a way because I can still turn a man on.

What do you think I should do?"

She looked at me a moment, not saying anything. Then, "Mabel, how often do you and your husband have sex?"

"Infrequently," I said. "And that's one word, not two.

She didn't even smile. "Were you sexually active before your marriage?"

"Very. And I do mean very."

"What made you decide to get married?"

"Oh, I just figured it was time to settle down."

"Were you in love with Gregory?"

"Oh sure, I liked him. But to tell you the truth, doc, I liked all the men I dated, one way or another. I like men.

That's no sin, is it?"

"Of course not. But of all the men you liked, you picked Gregory. Was there something special about him? " I laughed. "Sure there was. He had a good job and good chances for promotion. You can't blame a girl for being practical, can you?"

"Mmm. Do you want to save your marriage, Mabel? "