Stephen Cannell: Runaway Heart

"Jack," Herman said. "I was serious about wanting you to join the Institute for Planetary Justice."

"Really?" Jack didn't think he wanted to join the Institute unless they could rename it.

"I'm serious," Herman said. "Right now I'm working on a new class action suit against the Department of Energy and six oil companies. I could use some.help."

"Gee, Herm, I don't know. My car uses lots of oil. I count on those guys."

"This is big," the heavy attorney said waving his hands around like he was cleaning a plateglass window. "Get this, Jack, I think the government conspired with the oil companies to steal the patent rights from the estate of a man who designed a paint that acts as a solar panel. I don't have to tell you what would happen if they used solar-energy-generating paint on cars."

"They'll get hot and explode?" Jack said, trying to look unsophisticated and dumb, something he could usually accomplish without effect.

"No, no. They'd run forever without fuel. Think what that would do for the economy, for the environment… for the planet.

"Right… right, for the planet. Yeah, I can see that."

"You and Susan and I could make a difference here. You could be a part of this. We could reverse global warming."

"I'll give it some thought," Jack said.

Then Susan took his hand and led him up to the front door of the clinic where a tall, thin woman named Elizabeth Donovan was waiting for him. Jack had been expecting the other Betty.

'Til be right in," Jack assured her. Elizabeth left and he turned to Susan.

"I'm so proud of you," she said. "And Dad is serious, you know. He really wants you with us."

"Is he always like that? I mean, does he always look like he's selling used cars?"

"Yeah, even though his ticker got fixed he still has a runaway heart."

"Right," Jack said. "I can see that."

"So gimme a kiss and call me every day."

Jack did as he was instructed: he took Susan Strockmire in his arms and kissed her. His love for her poured over his tortured body, soothing everything, making him whole again.

"I want to do it," he said.

"Do what?" she looked puzzled.

"Marry you." He was still holding her. "I want you to be my wife. I want us to grow old together. I want Izzy to sing at our wedding."

"I accept, but wouldn't Barbra be a better choice?" Then she smiled and kissed him again. This one lasted a long time. She pulled back and studied him. "You're my hero," she said softly. "Now, get in there and kick some ass."

So Jack Wirta, newly engaged hero, turned, but instead of riding into the sunset he walked into the Betty Ford Clinic. The door closed and Elizabeth Donovan took his arm.

"Mrs. Ford is in her office and wants to meet you. You'll really like it here. This month will just fly by."

Month? Nobody said anything about a month! But she had a death grip on Jack's arm and was leading him down the hall. There was no turning back. He had a job to do.

He'd ride off into that damn sunset later.