Dave Zeltserman - Small crimes

'Get what over with?' He was smiling his pleasant smile. 'I've got good news. Manny died this morning of respiratory failure. You're going to be walking out of here alive.'

I almost burst out crying then. I had to bite my lip to hold it back.

'Don't you have anything to say, Joe?’

‘Get these cuffs off me,' I said.

'I can't do that. It's not over yet. But I'll cuff you in front. Just don't try anything stupid.'

He placed the paper bag next to me, and then got on his knees so he could uncuff me. I couldn't have tried anything even if I wanted to, my arms were too stiff. It took some effort but I moved my hands in front of me so he could cuff me.

'Goddam it, you smell ripe, Joe. There's a sandwich in that bag. Also a bottle of water. It's all you're going to get today so you might want to save some for later.'

'Awfully considerate of you.'

He chuckled and gave me a thoughtful look. 'Not really. After everything I've been through, I don't want you dying on me now.'

'Why isn't it over yet?’

‘Be patient.'

I reached into the bag and got out the water. I fumbled a bit before I was able to get the top off. After taking a long drink, I put the water down. Dan watched with amusement sparkling in his eyes.

'Anyone looking for me over what happened at Junior's?'

He shook his head. 'Junior didn't mention you.'

'How about Earl? Did he file a complaint against me?'

He shook his head again. 'No. I wouldn't worry about that either. From what I understand he'd be sending himself to prison if he did.'

I picked up the water again and drank almost half of it. When I put the bottle down, I forced myself to meet Dan's eyes. 'You forced Charlotte to kill Manny,' I said. He just smiled at me.

'Damn it, why isn't it over?’

‘Bye, Joe.' He left then.

The day dragged on. My mind kept racing over what must've happened. Dan must've approached Charlotte, showed her the picture he took, and gave her a choice – have me die and her exposed, or get rid of Manny. It must've been something like that. But why wasn't it over? I racked my brains trying to think of why, but I couldn't come up with anything.

It had been dark for hours when I heard a car drive up. It seemed to take forever for the footsteps to approach the door and for Dan to walk in. He was carrying some clothes and he gave me a grim look as he nodded towards me.

'It's over now, Joe.'

I didn't say anything. I just sat still as he took the cuffs off me. I sat for a while trying to rub the aching out of my joints.

'Why don't you put those clothes on, Joe,' he said.

'I need some help standing up.' He gave me his hand. It took some effort but I got to my feet. I had to move like an old cripple as I got out of my shirt and pants and put on the clothes Dan had brought me.

'How is it over now?' I asked.

'You're going to hear about it anyway,' Dan said, shrugging. 'Somehow Junior figured out that your nurse friend was responsible for Manny's death. Early this afternoon he abducted her. My office got a tip on it. I got a search warrant and me and my boys raided his playroom. He was there with a couple of his boys. We ended up shooting it out. It was really something, Joe. Bottom line, Junior's dead.'

'What about Charlotte?'

He shrugged uneasily. 'She was half chopped up when we got there. There was no way of saving her.’

‘You killed her.'

'Be careful, Joe. This is over now.'

'You tipped Junior off to her,' I said, my words sounding distant and hollow. 'You followed her and watched Junior take her. You waited until you knew she'd be dead before you raided that room.'

'Look, it's over, okay? And don't start playing all high and mighty with me!' A hot anger flushed his face. He clenched his fist and took a step towards me. With his other hand he grabbed my shirt collar and pulled me forward so my face was inches from his. 'You could have done what you kept promising, but shit, no, you left it up to me.'

He let go of me and took a step away. The anger had drained from him, leaving his face sickly pale. 'What was I going to do? That woman was a loon. You could see it in her eyes. I wasn't going to let her hang around and hope she'd keep her mouth shut. And I needed Junior dead. But Christ, Joe, you've got no one to blame but yourself for any of this.'

'You killed her.'

'Shut up, Joe. It's over now. Just shut up. Anyway, what's the big deal? You told me she murdered four people. It was only justice catching up to her.'

It wasn't justice. Not to die like that. I tried to think what it must've been like for Charlotte, but I was too numb to think. Too numb to really feel anything.

'I talked to Simpson this afternoon,' Dan said. 'Your relocation to Albany is all set. Call him next week and he'll give you a name and number of a parole officer there to contact. I had your car towed to Bradley. I'll drive you over and that will be it. You'll get in your car, drive to Albany, be with your daughters, and I'll never see or hear from you again, right?'

I nodded. I followed him to his car. During the ride back he tried some small talk, but after a while it was like listening to the wind.

After Dan dropped me off at my car, I got out the bottle of aspirin that I kept in my glove compartment and chewed on a handful of them. I then found a twenty-four-hour convenience store, bought some food, a six-pack of beer, bandages, and antiseptic ointment. I headed off to Eastfield after that and stopped off at the first motel I came across. The desk clerk didn't look like he wanted to give me a room. I couldn't blame him, but I paid him cash and he handed me a key.

I spent some time trying to clean out the gash under my cheek and my other cuts and scrapes. It stung like hell when I put the antiseptic ointment on. After bandaging up my wounds up as best I could, I filled up the tub with hot water. When I took off my shirt and looked at myself in the mirror, I saw my side was one big purple bruise. I had no doubt that I had some cracked ribs. It didn't matter, though. Over time they'd heal.

I ate the food and then gingerly lowered myself into the tub. As I lay in it, I had two of the beers. For the most part they were tasteless, or at least they seemed that way. After I got out, I dried myself off, and lowered myself onto the bed. I tried to picture Charlotte, tried to imagine how she looked when her eyes were calm and not jumping around like ping-pong balls. I tried to concentrate, but I couldn't picture her. She was gone. As much as

I wanted to mourn her there was nothing left for me to mourn. My memory of her had faded away. After a while I gave up trying. Then I closed my eyes.

Next thing I knew it was two thirty in the afternoon. I had been asleep over fourteen hours. I felt groggy, disoriented. It was as if the world had shifted somehow. I lay there for another half-hour. I felt this sense of disquiet that I couldn't shake. I just felt so damn alone.

I got up and found Tina's business card in my wallet. I was able to get her at her desk.

'Hi,' I said, 'I think I've waited long enough.’

‘Really?'

'Can I stop by later, maybe at seven, and we could have dinner?'

'I'd like that, Joe. I can't wait to see you.'

I felt better then. Her voice had sounded so sweet. I just hoped I'd be able to talk her into moving to Albany with me.

I checked the clock and saw that it was a quarter past two. With a forty-five-minute drive to Burlington that left me four hours to do what I needed to do. I took a shower, dressed, grabbed my duffel bag and got out of there.

I still had the paperwork for the police pension on me. I hadn't thrown it away yet. I looked it over, signed it, and took it over to the post office. I figured I'd collect the thirty-four sixty a month while training for a job, but once I got settled I'd drop it.