Dave Zeltserman - Blood Crimes Book One

The story ended and the next story up was about the local baseball team’s recent six-game losing streak. Jim turned off the set. He sure as fuck did dodge a bullet. The police found Posey’s body only an hour after the killing thanks to a prostitution sweep. Forget about how they could’ve been entering that alley while Jim was feeding; with them there so quickly after the killing all they would’ve had to find was one homeless person hidden in a doorway who had spotted Posey grabbing Carol and that could’ve led them to finding out about Carol and Posey meeting in that bar, and then a police drawing of Carol being splashed across the news. The thought of that made him wince. While there was never any risk of these predators hurting Carol-he was never more than a heartbeat away from her-he had been in denial over the police somehow tying her any of his killings. He made a decision then. He wasn’t going to use Carol as bait anymore.

He had quit smoking when he joined the Army, but right then he could’ve used a cigarette. Or more accurately, he could’ve chain smoked through a carton. The thought of how close he came to putting Carol in jeopardy left him jittery as hell. Over the last three years he had selfishly rationalized that she wanted to be part of what he did. It wasn’t anything they ever talked about, but he knew that this was tied to her being attacked in Newark; that being involved with killing these predators gave her a release from the anger that she carried. Because of that, he went along with it, but it still wasn’t right for him to include her. Fuck. A shiver went down his spine. Never again. Never fucking again. He knew she was going to fight him tooth and nail over it, but he was never going to subject her to that type of risk again. He would just have to suck it up and stop tormenting himself over what he needed to do. He knew what these people were, he could smell it off of them, fuck his conscience. He would just do what he had to, and be satisfied with knowing that in his own way he was making the world a better place. That police spokesman was full of shit.

Another shiver ran through him.

What the fuck did he almost do to Carol?

He shook his head as if by doing so he could shake those images of what could’ve happened out of his brain. Never again. Yeah, Carol was going to put up a stink about it, but never fucking again.

He breathed in deeply, held it, and tried to calm the noise buzzing through his mind. It was over. They dodged the bullet. Carol was safe. Time to move on.

He picked up the money roll from where he had tossed it the other night and peeled off several hundred dollars from it. The roll was still thick enough to choke a bull. He got off the bed, lifted it and stashed the roll underneath the wooden frame. Unless someone was going to drain the mattress, the bed weighed a good five hundred pounds, and no one was going to look under it for any money.

He couldn’t shake this his restlessness. He walked over to the window, pushed the curtains away so he could peek outside. The sky was gray, overcast, as if it were going to start raining later that afternoon. With the sun mostly hidden, he could probably go outside without getting sick, or at least not as sick as the sunlight usually made him. He didn’t feel like staying cooped up in this dingy motel room, but he also didn’t want to miss Carol when she got back. He closed his eyes and tried to decide what to do. Finally, he came to a decision and headed to the shower. The water was lukewarm and came out in a drip, but he cleaned up as best he could, although he couldn’t help feeling that no amount of scrubbing would ever remove the smell of death from his skin; that even if he scoured himself with steel wool, traces of his killings would still be left behind. While he dried off, Carol came back, found him in the bathroom, and got on her toes so she could kiss him hard on the mouth.

“That was really nice last night,” she said. “You had my head pounding. I thought I was going to pass out.”

It was always like that after a killing. She’d get so turned on, so excited, so much stuff pent up that needed to be released. All that rage inside needing an outlet. And here he was, using her as bait for predators so she would be perpetually feeding her anger and never able to move past it. What the fuck was wrong with him? What the fuck could he possibly have been thinking?

“I can’t take all the credit for last night,” he said, a tentative smile moving across his face as he tried hard to keep his self-loathing hidden from her. “The waterbed helped a lot.”

“No, Hon, it wasn’t the waterbed.”

She moved her hands from behind his neck and rested them on his hairless chest. Before becoming infected, he had a small forest growing there. He smiled sickly to himself thinking how if the infection spread it would put all the laser hair removal outfits out of business.

“You feel good, Hon,” Carol breathed lightly. “So cool and so good. I’m burning up right now. Why don’t we go back to bed so you can cool me off.”

Jim gave her a quick kiss on her lips, his smile weakening as he slipped past her so he could get to his clothes.

“We’ve got nine grand burning a hole in my pocket,” he said. “I was thinking you deserve a shopping spree. It’s been a while. We could save the other activity for later.”

Her eyes turned guarded. “I don’t feel like being away from you right now,” she said.

He slipped on a pair of jeans and a tee shirt, both of which he had washed in the sink the night before and left hung up to dry. They were both damp, and with his body temperature at around seventy degrees, they were going to stay that way.

“I was thinking we’d make this a date. Do some shopping, catch a movie, you know, typical couple stuff.”

“I don’t want you to have to go outside. It was tough enough seeing you suffer yesterday.”

“It’s overcast. I’ll be fine. What do you say we go out and spend some money and have some fun?”

She didn’t say anything.

“Come on.”

She nodded without much enthusiasm. “Sure, okay.”

“Great, let’s go find us a mall.”

Jim squeezed her hand and felt a moist heat from her skin. He was always amazed at how much heat she produced. It was like a furnace working overtime inside her. They continued to hold hands as they left their motel room. Even with a gray and murky sky there was enough sunlight filtering through the clouds to make him nauseous. He pulled his baseball cap down further over his head and tried to keep his discomfort from Carol. It didn’t take long for them to find a mall, and once they were inside among the artificial fluorescent lighting he was fine. Carol quickly loosened up and got into her shopping. Most of her purchases were really for Jim; black stiletto pumps, sheer negligee, a perfume that she had him pick out, but he also convinced her to buy a few things for herself, CDs from bands he had never heard of, bath salts, lotions and a few other small luxury items. The mall had a California Pizza, and after they had gotten seated, Carol was absolutely buoyant, maybe happier than Jim had ever seen her. It was like all the hard years together had been stripped away from her, and it made him realize the type of life he was stealing from her when a day like this was an unusual extravagance for them.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, arching an eyebrow.

Jim shook his head, forcing a smile. “Nothing, it’s just nice to see you so happy.”

She grinned at that, her brown eyes gleaming. “It’s been a fun day. I’m glad you suggested it. And look at all my loot!”

She lifted her shopping bags in triumph. Jim nodded, still forcing the same rigid smile, all the while feeling sick to his stomach realizing this couldn’t go on much longer. She deserved a normal life, at least far more normal than what he was dragging her through. It was about time he quit being such a fucking selfish prick. Yeah, right, she wouldn’t be able to survive without him. Who the fuck was he kidding? Over time she’d get over him and move onto something closer to normalcy. He was the one who wouldn’t be able to survive a separation, but that was the way it was going to have to be. At least he’d be leaving her with close to nine thousand dollars. At least she’d have that to help her get started. He felt both relief and an unbelievable emptiness welling inside once he accepted that he would be leaving her. He would do it later that day. Make it like a Band-Aid that needed to be ripped off. Afterwards he would head to New York to finally finish old business. Finally do his last mission. Whatever heartache he was going to suffer wasn’t going to last long.